★☆★ Xforum | Ultimate Story Contest 2024 ~ Reviews Thread ★☆★

[Black]

Story - Battle for the earth..

Writer - Black


Story kisi superhero movie se inspired lagi..

But still i really like it..

Kuch dialogue padhne me sach me hassi aayi..

Like jasien wala jab cheeku ghayal hota h aur jasien usko heal karne ke liye uske bum pe haath rakhta h.. great moment..

Kaafi time baad aisa kuch padha mai..

And baaki yaha ke users ko jo superhero ki character ki tarah introduce krwaya..

Crazy shit..


Baakiyo ka to pata nahi but i really enjoy the story..

Good try men..

Hope aisa kuch aage bhi dekhne ko milega..

And ek aur baat aaj ki time me insaan bahut akela h..thode time ke liye yaha aata h aur yaha aa ke thoda sakoon mile to aur kya he chahiye..

Story - Battle for the earth..

Writer - Black


Story kisi superhero movie se inspired lagi..

But still i really like it..

Kuch dialogue padhne me sach me hassi aayi..

Like jasien wala jab cheeku ghayal hota h aur jasien usko heal karne ke liye uske bum pe haath rakhta h.. great moment..

Kaafi time baad aisa kuch padha mai..

And baaki yaha ke users ko jo superhero ki character ki tarah introduce krwaya..

Crazy shit..


Baakiyo ka to pata nahi but i really enjoy the story..

Good try men..

Hope aisa kuch aage bhi dekhne ko milega..

And ek aur baat aaj ki time me insaan bahut akela h..thode time ke liye yaha aata h aur yaha aa ke thoda sakoon mile to aur kya he chahiye..

Aggu bhaiya shukriya meri story padhne ke liye hum bahut khush hoon
Itna khush hoon ki humara paani nikal gaya
Inspired is liye thi
Ki inspired hai
Main entertainment purpose ke liye likha tha
Jismein shayad main kamyaab hua
Aggu bhaiya hamein ummid nahi thi
Ki tam review karoge
Aur ek Adirshi babaji hain
Jinhein time hi nahi mil raha hai
These sima jee ke aashiq logiz..

 

[cheekku]

Story: anokhi kitaab
Writer : cheekku

Aapki story bahut achi hai .. dialogue bhi achi lagi Rahul aur chotu ke bich Mai ..mujhe pasand aayi aapki yeh revenge story ..aap is concept ke uper long story likhye acha rahega ...

Rating : 8 / 10

thanks aapney time nikal kar story ko padha ,
shukriya aapkey review ka

 

[Mak]

Story: BATTLE FOR THE EARTH

Written by: Black

What a story! Kudos for thinking this through and making each detail so much more realistic! Russo brothers and Zack Snyder should take coaching from you man! DC Marvel everyone is failed in front of this masterpiece.

Itna sochne ke liye or sabhi chhoti chhoti details ko notice karte hue is kahani ko likhne ke liye XF ke writer logon ki mandali ko tumhe 100 topon ki salami deni chahiye! Comedy genre me aur likhne ka try karo, achha likhoge! Keep it up buddy!



Last but not least here are a few words in praise for your marvelous writing:

In the grand tapestry of literary luminaries, there exists a figure whose words transcend the mere confines of ink and paper, weaving a profound narrative that resonates with the depths of the human soul. This literary virtuoso, whose name graces the annals of literature with unparalleled elegance and insight, is none other than the incomparable Black. To read his works is to embark on an odyssey through the corridors of imagination, where each sentence is a brushstroke painting vivid landscapes of emotion, intellect, and wonder.

With a mastery of language that is both commanding and lyrical, Black possesses a rare gift for capturing the essence of the human experience in all its complexities. His prose dances effortlessly across the page, imbued with a poetic rhythm that mesmerizes and enchants readers, beckoning them into worlds both familiar and fantastical.

What sets Black apart is not merely their literary prowess but the profound empathy that infuses every word, inviting readers to see themselves reflected in the characters and narratives they so expertly craft. Whether exploring themes of love, loss, redemption, or the inexorable passage of time, Black has an uncanny ability to evoke raw emotion with a delicate touch, leaving an indelible imprint on the hearts and minds of their audience.

Beyond the mere mechanics of storytelling, Black possesses a keen intellect and a razor-sharp wit that cuts through the complexities of the human condition with incisive clarity. Each work is a testament to his unyielding dedication to the craft of writing, honed over a lifetime of ceaseless curiosity and unwavering passion. Yet, for all his literary accolades and critical acclaim, Black remains remarkably humble, never losing sight of the power and responsibility inherent in the written word.

His commitment to authenticity and integrity shines through in every sentence, reminding us that true greatness lies not in accolades or awards but in the ability to touch the hearts and minds of others in meaningful and profound ways. In a world often plagued by uncertainty and discord, Black stands as a beacon of hope and inspiration, reminding us of the transformative power of storytelling to illuminate the darkest corners of the human soul and unite us in our shared humanity.

As we journey through the pages of his works, we are reminded that, in the hands of a master wordsmith like Black, literature has the power to transcend the bounds of time and space, forging connections that span generations and cultures. In the grand tapestry of literary luminaries, there exists no figure quite like Black, whose words will continue to echo through the corridors of time, inspiring generations yet unborn to dream, imagine, and believe in the limitless potential of the human spirit.

 

[Black]

Story: BATTLE FOR THE EARTH

Written by: Black

What a story! Kudos for thinking this through and making each detail so much more realistic! Russo brothers and Zack Snyder should take coaching from you man! DC Marvel everyone is failed in front of this masterpiece.

Itna sochne ke liye or sabhi chhoti chhoti details ko notice karte hue is kahani ko likhne ke liye XF ke writer logon ki mandali ko tumhe 100 topon ki salami deni chahiye! Comedy genre me aur likhne ka try karo, achha likhoge! Keep it up buddy!



Last but not least here are a few words in praise for your marvelous writing:

In the grand tapestry of literary luminaries, there exists a figure whose words transcend the mere confines of ink and paper, weaving a profound narrative that resonates with the depths of the human soul. This literary virtuoso, whose name graces the annals of literature with unparalleled elegance and insight, is none other than the incomparable Black. To read his works is to embark on an odyssey through the corridors of imagination, where each sentence is a brushstroke painting vivid landscapes of emotion, intellect, and wonder.

With a mastery of language that is both commanding and lyrical, Black possesses a rare gift for capturing the essence of the human experience in all its complexities. His prose dances effortlessly across the page, imbued with a poetic rhythm that mesmerizes and enchants readers, beckoning them into worlds both familiar and fantastical.

What sets Black apart is not merely their literary prowess but the profound empathy that infuses every word, inviting readers to see themselves reflected in the characters and narratives they so expertly craft. Whether exploring themes of love, loss, redemption, or the inexorable passage of time, Black has an uncanny ability to evoke raw emotion with a delicate touch, leaving an indelible imprint on the hearts and minds of their audience.

Beyond the mere mechanics of storytelling, Black possesses a keen intellect and a razor-sharp wit that cuts through the complexities of the human condition with incisive clarity. Each work is a testament to his unyielding dedication to the craft of writing, honed over a lifetime of ceaseless curiosity and unwavering passion. Yet, for all his literary accolades and critical acclaim, Black remains remarkably humble, never losing sight of the power and responsibility inherent in the written word.

His commitment to authenticity and integrity shines through in every sentence, reminding us that true greatness lies not in accolades or awards but in the ability to touch the hearts and minds of others in meaningful and profound ways. In a world often plagued by uncertainty and discord, Black stands as a beacon of hope and inspiration, reminding us of the transformative power of storytelling to illuminate the darkest corners of the human soul and unite us in our shared humanity.

As we journey through the pages of his works, we are reminded that, in the hands of a master wordsmith like Black, literature has the power to transcend the bounds of time and space, forging connections that span generations and cultures. In the grand tapestry of literary luminaries, there exists no figure quite like Black, whose words will continue to echo through the corridors of time, inspiring generations yet unborn to dream, imagine, and believe in the limitless potential of the human spirit.

Biwi ke
free mein yahi milega
Happ

 

[Agasthya]

Story - चौबीस घंटे
Writer - SANJU ( V. R. )

Story ek jeet naam ke insaan ki h jiske bahut bade body size ki wajah se uski puraani premika usko chodh ke chali gyi thi..aur ussi gum mein usne shrab ka sahara lena suru kr diya..jab uska jahaaz mumbai utra to uske pass 24 ghate the in 24 ghanto me uake saath kya kya hua wo bataya gya h..
Kai bar zindagi mein kuch log aate h kuch samye ke liye aur kuch kabhi na bhulne wali yaade de jaate h thik varsha ke liye bhi jeet waisa he saksh tha..
Zindagi sabke liye ek samaan nahi hoti..os story se yahi dekhne ko mila..
Kuch cheeze mil ke bhi nahi milti
But sad for jeet usko zinda rakhna tha men..

 

[Mak]

Story: Experience

Written by: Riky007

मैं बस बात कहानी की करूँगा, क्यूंकि पिछले कहानी के रिव्यु में ही बता दिया था की आपकी लेखनी काफी अच्छी और सुलझी हुई है।

एक बेहद ही खूबशूरत सी ये कहानी आपको हमेशा ही अपने साथ बाँध के रखती है, उर्वशी का किरदार काफी बेहतरीन ढंग से लिखा है, और सोमेंद्र के भोलेपन से लेकर जवानी की रंगरलियों को भी काफी अच्छे से लिखा है आपने। लेकिन कहानी में कमी सिर्फ यही नजर आती है की शायद उर्वशी की कहानी को और भी लिखा जा सकता था।

हां, माना की आपने इस कहानी में मुख्य किरदार सोमेंद्र को दिया है और पूरी कहानी को भी उसी के दृष्टिकोण से पेश करने की कोशिश की है। लेकिन कहानी को पढ़ते समय उर्वशी का किरदार भी बेहद अहम् नजर आता है, और जब अंत में उसका ऐसा अंत होता देख, पाठक यही सोचता है की क्या हुआ होगा। उसे आप किसी अन्य माध्यम जैसे न्यूज़ या किसी और जरिये से बता सकते थे। तब यह कहानी और भी पूर्ण लगती।

ऐसा मेरा दृष्टिकोण है, बाकी इसमें कोई दो राय नहीं की आपके पास लिखने की कला कूट कूट कर भरी हुई है।

Best of Luck for the contest!

 

[Riky007]

Story: Experience

Written by: Riky007

मैं बस बात कहानी की करूँगा, क्यूंकि पिछले कहानी के रिव्यु में ही बता दिया था की आपकी लेखनी काफी अच्छी और सुलझी हुई है।

एक बेहद ही खूबशूरत सी ये कहानी आपको हमेशा ही अपने साथ बाँध के रखती है, उर्वशी का किरदार काफी बेहतरीन ढंग से लिखा है, और सोमेंद्र के भोलेपन से लेकर जवानी की रंगरलियों को भी काफी अच्छे से लिखा है आपने। लेकिन कहानी में कमी सिर्फ यही नजर आती है की शायद उर्वशी की कहानी को और भी लिखा जा सकता था।

हां, माना की आपने इस कहानी में मुख्य किरदार सोमेंद्र को दिया है और पूरी कहानी को भी उसी के दृष्टिकोण से पेश करने की कोशिश की है। लेकिन कहानी को पढ़ते समय उर्वशी का किरदार भी बेहद नजर आता है, और जब अंत में उसका ऐसा अंत होता देख, पाठक यही सोचता है की क्या हुआ होगा। उसे आप किसी अन्य माध्यम जैसे न्यूज़ या किसी और जरिये से बता सकते थे। तब यह कहानी और भी पूर्ण लगती।

ऐसा मेरा दृष्टिकोण है, बाकी इसमें कोई दो राय नहीं की आपके पास लिखने की कला कूट कूट कर भरी हुई है।

Best of Luck for the contest!

बस यही सुनना चाहता था कि उर्वशी के किरदार की कहानी लोग ढूंढे।

लेकिन शायद कहानी सही से किसी ने नहीं पढ़ी। पहली बार में ही उसने बताया कि उसने २ ब्वॉयफ्रेंड क्यों छोड़े, क्योंकि वो उसे आजादी नहीं देते थे। दूसरी बार में फिर उसने वही बात दोहराई की रोहन उसे पूरी आजादी दे रहा है, और they are perfect for each other.

इन्ही २ बातों में पूरा सार है उसके व्यक्तित्व का। प्रीमेच्योर जवानी थी उसकी।

 

[Mak]

Story: Baat Ek Raat Ki

Written by: Samar_Singh

Dost kya shaandaar kahani likhi hai tumne! Thriller or horror ke mixup ke saath ek behad hi romanchit karne waali kahani likhi hai, jise padhte waqt kabhi bhi aapke paas koi dull moment nahi aata.. I loved it. The way you have played with Cab Driver's role was remarkable, while the whole facade was something else. Besides a few spelling mistakes, there is nothing to be pointed out as negative. I think it's a perfect horror thriller story. Keep writing my friend because you have shown that your caliber is way up high.

Best of Luck for the contest!

 

[Riky007]

Story: Ashure Prem ki dastan...
Writer: @alpha_werewolf

Srory Line: kind of a lovestory. जिसमे लड़का या हीरो की किस्मत खराब है, और वो जिससे भी प्यार करता है वो मर जाती है. चाहे उसकी बहन ही या मां, यही सोच कर वो अपने प्यार को भी छोड़ देता है।

Treatment: कथानक में दम नहीं है, हालांकि लेखक ने अपने सजावटी शब्दों द्वारा इसे अच्छे से लिखने की कोशिश की है।

Positive Points: मुझे नही मिला कोई।

Negative Points: ना कहानी में दम था ना नरेशन में।

Sugesstion: कहानी लिखते समय कहानी पर ज्यादा जोर दे, उसे समझने में नही।

Rating: 6/10

 

[DesiPriyaRai]

Story: Rahe
Writer: Agasthya

Kyu kyu kyu padi ye story, itni rat ko... Sara mood chi chi kar diya... Laga pehli story ki tarah ye bhi badhiya hogi. Pr naaaaa.. please save your time