★☆★ Xforum | Ultimate Story Contest 2025 ~ Reviews Thread ★☆★

[Lucifer]

Unfortunately We are facing a server issue which limits most users from posting long posts which is very necessary for USC entries as all of them are above 5-7K words ,we are fixing this issue as I post this but it'll take few days so keeping this in mind the last date of entry thread is increased once again,Entry thread will be closed on 7th May 11:59 PM. And you can still post reviews for best reader's award till 13th May 11:59 PM. Sorry for the inconvenience caused.

You can PM your story to any mod and they'll post it for you.

Note to writers :- Don't try to post long updates instead post it in 2 Or more posts. Thanks. Regards :- Luci

 

[Avaran]

A white Ship with a Red sail
The Vincy Stoy

Writer - Vinci
Story genre - Romance

Story summary :
Anurag, a wealthy merchant’s son turned sailor, meets a delicate girl named Aarshi in a coastal town. Drawn by her dream of a white ship with a red sail, he promises to fulfil her wish. As their bond deepens, Aarshi’s health deteriorates. Despite his efforts, she passes away, but not before witnessing the arrival of the ship she always dreamed of — a final fulfillment of her soul’s longing.
The story ends with bittersweet beauty, highlighting love, dreams, and fate .

Positive point
* Beautiful Descriptions: The imagery is gorgeous. Every scene — from the port town to the lighthouse — is so vividly described that it feels cinematic.

* Emotional Depth: The emotions between Anurag and Aarshi are delicately built, especially their innocent, soft bond growing into deep love.

* Smooth Characterization: Anurag’s transition from a rich merchant’s son to a heartfelt hero is natural and believable. Aarshi’s ethereal presence is handled sensitively.

* Strong Ending:
The climax is heartbreaking but meaningful. The last moments with the arrival of the real red-sailed ship are emotionally cathartic.


Negative Points:
* Pacing Slightly Slow at Times:
Some parts (especially long internal monologues or overly detailed descriptions) could have been trimmed to maintain better momentum.

* Repetitions: Certain emotions (like Anurag's admiration or Aarshi’s frailty) are repeated with slight variations multiple times, which could slow the story down.

* Short verdict:
A beautifully written, heart-touching story with breathtaking imagery and emotional payoff, slightly dragged by slow pacing and a bit of repetition.

Overall it's a great
Rating 7.5/10

 

[Avaran]

Taboo

Writer - Vinci
Story genre - adultery

Story summary:
The story depicts a family grappling with the mother's terminal illness. The father, Ravi, experiences inappropriate sexual arousal towards his daughter, Neha, and ultimately r*p*s her.

Positive point - Depiction of Atmosphere: The author does create a strong sense of atmosphere, particularly in the initial sections describing the oppressive environment of the sickroom. Details like the "soft whirl of the ceiling fan," "canvas of shadows cast by the setting sun," and "faint beep of the heart monitor" effectively establish the mood of grief and impending loss.

Negativee point:
* Character Inconsistencies: The father's sudden and extreme shift from a grieving caregiver to a sexual abuser is jarring and unconvincing. While emotional distress can lead to complex behavior, the text doesn't provide a credible psychological foundation for this transformation.

* Lack of Moral Compass: The narrative lacks a clear moral compass. There's no strong condemnation of the father's actions within the text itself, which can leave the reader with a sense of unease and a lack of resolution.

* Short verdict
The writing has its merits, but the scene is extremely disturbing."


While the story is well-written, the incest between the father and daughter is extremely disturbing, primarily because it was committed without the girl's consent."

Adirshi Yug Purush
इस स्टोरी को कृपया देखे इसमें बिना लड़की की अनुमति के उसके साथ relation बनाया गया है । एक तरह हम उसे r*p* ही कहते हैं।
बहुत disturbing सीन है।

Rating 4.5/10

 

[Avaran]

एक रात, एक हत्या, और एक राज़

Writer : Daredevil420
Story genre - murder mystery

* Story summary : कहानी दिल्ली में एक न्यू ईयर पार्टी में हुई अर्पिता मल्होत्रा नाम की एक महिला की हत्या के बारे में है। इंस्पेक्टर ईशान वर्मा मामले की जांच करते हैं और कई संदिग्धों को पाते हैं, जिनमें अर्पिता की बहन, एक क्लाइंट, और एक दोस्त शामिल हैं। अंत में, पता चलता है कि उसकी सौतेली बहन ने उसे ज़हर दिया था।

Positive point
* Suspense and tension: कहानी की शुरुआत से ही एक रहस्यमय माहौल बनाया गया है। जैसे-जैसे जांच आगे बढ़ती है, तनाव बढ़ता जाता है, जिससे पाठक बांधे रहते हैं। अर्पिता की हत्या के आसपास की परिस्थितियाँ, कई संदिग्धों का होना, और हर एक के अपने रहस्य कहानी को आकर्षक बनाते हैं।

* Character Development: कहानी में कई पात्र हैं, और प्रत्येक का अपना एक अलग व्यक्तित्व और पृष्ठभूमि है। इंस्पेक्टर ईशान वर्मा का चरित्र विशेष रूप से अच्छी तरह से विकसित किया गया है, एक तेजतर्रार जासूस के रूप में जो सच्चाई को उजागर करने के लिए दृढ़ है।

* Negativee point
Too many Suspects: कहानी में बहुत सारे संदिग्ध हैं, जिनमें से प्रत्येक का हत्या करने का एक संभावित कारण है। इससे पाठक के लिए यह अनुमान लगाना मुश्किल हो जाता है कि असली हत्यारा कौन है, और यह कहानी को थोड़ा भ्रमित करने वाला बना सकता है।

* Lack of description: कुछ जगहों पर, जो कुछ भी बताया गया है, वह थोड़ा कमज़ोर लगता है। उदाहरण के लिए, घटनाओं और दृश्यों को और अच्छे से बताया जा सकता था, ताकि पाठक उन्हें और बेहतर ढंग से सोच सकें। माहौल कैसा था और पात्र कैसा महसूस कर रहे थे, इसे और गहराई से दिखाया जा सकता था।

* Short verdict :
"रहस्य अच्छा है, पर कहानी थोड़ी उलझी हुई और वर्णन कमज़ोर है। फिर भी, पढ़ने लायक है।"

Overall it's a good
Rating 6.5/10

 

[vakharia]

Story review: A White Ship with a Red Sail
Author: Vinci
​

Honestly, I wasn't ready for this...!!!

You know that feeling when you start reading something, expecting a regular 'boy meets girl' story... and then BAMMM..!! it sucker-punches you right in the feels? Yeah, that’s what Vinci ’s “A White Ship with a Red Sail” did to me.

At first, it’s all chill... sun shining, ships creaking, seagulls screaming like they're running a mafia gang in the port. Anurag steps in like a rich boy on a little soul-searching trip, hair blowing in the sea breeze like a Bollywood hero. You're thinking, “Okay, cool, this guy's gonna flirt, buy a few spices, go home.”

Wrong..!!

Instead, dude finds himself knee-deep in some next-level emotional chaos. Because there’s Aarshi.. a literal painting of sadness and sunshine mixed together. Tiny, fragile, and dreaming about some ship with white sails and a red one, straight outta fairy tales. And just like that.. Anurag? Hooked. Me? Hooked. Every reader? probaby hooked.

And man, the market scene? It had more chemistry than a science lab. Anurag seeing Aarshi holding that wooden toy ship like it's the last hope in the universe... I swear I almost shedded tears into my chai. And I don’t cry easily..!!

What’s hilarious, though in a tragic kind of way, is how determined Anurag gets. Like, my man’s out there ready to fight barnacles, storms, and half of China's spice traders just to find some red cloth for a toy. I mean, Hallmark movies wish they had this level of drama.

Also.. can we take a moment for the shopkeeper? What a king..!! Guy's selling hope with a side of sarcasm, acting like he’s Gandalf in a fish market. “Red silk, my dude? Might as well find unicorn hair.”

But, jokes aside, once Aarshi’s real condition comes out.. oofff..!!! That hit like a truck. No melodrama, no "oh my God tragic background music" just soft, aching reality. Her time is ticking, and she's clinging to this dream of seeing her ship. And Anurag? He’s out there making it happen like a damn legend.

The lighthouse scenes? Ohh, those wrecked me. When he carries her up the stairs, like she’s lighter than a feather and heavier than the whole ocean in his heart? Yes, full-on Titanic mode... except no icebergs. Only emotional ones.

And when that ship with the red sail actually comes into the harbour?? Just when you think life’s a joke, the universe delivers one perfect moment.

I swear to God, if I had been in that lighthouse, I would’ve ugly-cried so hard that those seagulls would’ve been personally concerned.

Now, keeping it real...
The story does get a little wordy at times. Like, you know when your friend’s telling a great story but keeps adding "and then this happened... and THEN that happened..." yes, a little bit of that. Could’ve tightened some parts without losing the magic.

But honestly? When the writing is this soulful, who even cares. I was too busy feeling things I haven’t processed since I saw the movie Up as a kid.

Finally...
This story is a quiet punch in the gut about dreams, promises, and those people you meet once and never, ever forget. Also, reminder to self: next time someone wants a red-sailed toy ship? Just buy it, no questions asked. You never know what it might mean to them.

Godspeed, Aarshi. And Anurag.. you absolute, stubborn legend.

Vinci, you owe me emotional reparations, bro..!!​

 

[Vinci]

"A White Ship with a Red Sail" by Vinci

Ek sundar aur marmik kahani hai jo Anurag aur Aarshi ke beech ek chhoti si mulakat aur unki gahri dosti ko darshati hai. Anurag ek amir vyapari ka beta ek port par Aarshi se milta hai jo ek lighthouse keeper ki beti hai aur ek asadhya bimari se joojh rahi hai. Aarshi ka sapna ek A White Ship with a Red Sail ka hai jo uski maa ki kahaniyon se juda hai. Anurag uske sapne ko poora karne ka prayas karta hai aur is dauran un dono ke beech ek gahra rishta banta hai jo prem aur samarpan se bhara hai. Kahani kahani ka ant sad hai jab Aarshi apna akhiri sapna dekhte hue duniya chhod deti hai.

Positive Points:

▪︎ Bhavnatmak Gahraai: Kahani dil ko chhoo leti hai. Anurag aur Aarshi ke rishte ka vikas, unki chhoti-chhoti baatein aur Aarshi ki nazukta aur sapne dil se dil tak jate hain. Aarshi ka sapna aur uski maa ki kahani ek roohani gehrai deti hai.

▪︎ Vivaran aur Imagery: Port, samudra, lighthouse aur bazaar ka vivaran itna sundar hai ki padhte hue dikhayi deta hai. Laal sail aur safed jahaz ka pratik (symbolism) kahani ko aur sundar banata hai.

▪︎ Patron ka Vikas: Anurag ka safar ek amir ladke se ek samvedansheel aur samarpit vyakti tak ka bahut sundar dikhaya gaya hai. Aarshi ka charitra bhi apni kamzori ke bawajood prernadayak hai.

▪︎ Bhasha aur Rhythm: Kahani ka pravah (flow) shant aur sundar hai jaise samudra ki lehren. Bhasha kavyatmak hai jo bhavnaon ko aur gahra karti hai.

Negative Points:

▪︎ Kuch Jagah Dheema Pravah: Kahani ka kuch hissa jaise Anurag ke vicharon ka vivaran thoda lamba lagta hai jo padhne ke rhythm ko todta hai isse kahani thodi dheemi ho jati hai.

▪︎ Kuch Prashnon ka Abhav: Aarshi ki bimari ke bare mein aur uske parivar ke itihas ke bare mein thodi aur jaankari milti to kahani aur gahri hoti. Iske alawa Anurag ke parivar ka zikr sirf shuruaat mein hota hai unka koi role baad mein nahi dikhta.

▪︎ Dukhant ka Bhar: Kahani ka ant dukhant hai jo kuch pathakon ke liye bhari ho sakta hai agar thodi si ummeed ya khushi ka element hota to shayad ant aur santulit lagta.

Ek Acchi Kahani ke Liye Kya Accha Kya Bura:

▪︎ Accha: Ek acchi kahani dil ko chhuti hai aur is kahani mein bhavnaon ka gehra bandhan hai. Vivaran aur pratik ka upyog kahani ko yaadgar banata hai. Patra (characters ka vikas aur unke rishte kahani ka dil hain jo yahan sundar tarike se dikhaya gaya hai.

▪︎ Bura: Kahani ka pravah agar kabhi-kabhi toot jaye ya kuch prashn anuttarit rahen to pathak ka dhyaan bhatak sakta hai. Iske alawa ek hi bhavna (jaise dukh) ka zyada bhar kahani ko ek rukh banata hai.

Vartani aur Rhythm:

Vartani (spelling) mein koi kami nahi hai bhasha saaf aur sundar hai. Rhythm shuru mein thoda dheema lagta hai lekin jaise-jaise kahani aage badhti hai bhavnaon ke saath pravah badh jata hai. Kuch jagah par lambe descriptionko chhota kiya ja sakta tha taaki kahani ka tempo bana rahe.

Overall:

Kahani sundar aur bhavnatmak anubhav hai jo prem, sapne aur khushi ke lamhon ko ujaagar karti hai.​

Thanks Aakash, for reading my story. Mujhe khushi hai aapko mera story ka plot achcha laga. Naration drag ho gaya, lambi batei or choti si message. I got it. Main aapka avari hu ki aapne apna kimti time nikalke na sirf meri story padhi, balki apna valuable advice bhi diya. Thanks again.

 

[Vinci]

Writer - Vinci
Story genre - Romance

Story summary :
Anurag, a wealthy merchant’s son turned sailor, meets a delicate girl named Aarshi in a coastal town. Drawn by her dream of a white ship with a red sail, he promises to fulfil her wish. As their bond deepens, Aarshi’s health deteriorates. Despite his efforts, she passes away, but not before witnessing the arrival of the ship she always dreamed of — a final fulfillment of her soul’s longing.
The story ends with bittersweet beauty, highlighting love, dreams, and fate .

Positive point
* Beautiful Descriptions: The imagery is gorgeous. Every scene — from the port town to the lighthouse — is so vividly described that it feels cinematic.

* Emotional Depth: The emotions between Anurag and Aarshi are delicately built, especially their innocent, soft bond growing into deep love.

* Smooth Characterization: Anurag’s transition from a rich merchant’s son to a heartfelt hero is natural and believable. Aarshi’s ethereal presence is handled sensitively.

* Strong Ending:
The climax is heartbreaking but meaningful. The last moments with the arrival of the real red-sailed ship are emotionally cathartic.


Negative Points:
* Pacing Slightly Slow at Times:
Some parts (especially long internal monologues or overly detailed descriptions) could have been trimmed to maintain better momentum.

* Repetitions: Certain emotions (like Anurag's admiration or Aarshi’s frailty) are repeated with slight variations multiple times, which could slow the story down.

* Short verdict:
A beautifully written, heart-touching story with breathtaking imagery and emotional payoff, slightly dragged by slow pacing and a bit of repetition.

Overall it's a great
Rating 7.5/10

Thank you Acronym so much for taking the time to read and review my story A white ship with a red sail. I’m truly grateful for your thoughtful and detailed feedback, which highlights both the strengths and areas for improvement. Your kind words about the bittersweet climax with the red-sailed ship mean the world to me. They affirm the heart I poured into crafting this tale of love, dreams, and fate.
I also appreciate your notes about the pacing and repetitions. These insights are incredibly valuable and will guide me in refining my storytelling to keep the momentum flowing.
Your support and encouragement inspire me to keep writing and growing. Thank you again for your time and thoughtful review!

 

[Vinci]

Story review: A White Ship with a Red Sail
Author: Vinci
​

Honestly, I wasn't ready for this...!!!

You know that feeling when you start reading something, expecting a regular 'boy meets girl' story... and then BAMMM..!! it sucker-punches you right in the feels? Yeah, that’s what Vinci ’s “A White Ship with a Red Sail” did to me.

At first, it’s all chill... sun shining, ships creaking, seagulls screaming like they're running a mafia gang in the port. Anurag steps in like a rich boy on a little soul-searching trip, hair blowing in the sea breeze like a Bollywood hero. You're thinking, “Okay, cool, this guy's gonna flirt, buy a few spices, go home.”

Wrong..!!

Instead, dude finds himself knee-deep in some next-level emotional chaos. Because there’s Aarshi.. a literal painting of sadness and sunshine mixed together. Tiny, fragile, and dreaming about some ship with white sails and a red one, straight outta fairy tales. And just like that.. Anurag? Hooked. Me? Hooked. Every reader? probaby hooked.

And man, the market scene? It had more chemistry than a science lab. Anurag seeing Aarshi holding that wooden toy ship like it's the last hope in the universe... I swear I almost shedded tears into my chai. And I don’t cry easily..!!

What’s hilarious, though in a tragic kind of way, is how determined Anurag gets. Like, my man’s out there ready to fight barnacles, storms, and half of China's spice traders just to find some red cloth for a toy. I mean, Hallmark movies wish they had this level of drama.

Also.. can we take a moment for the shopkeeper? What a king..!! Guy's selling hope with a side of sarcasm, acting like he’s Gandalf in a fish market. “Red silk, my dude? Might as well find unicorn hair.”

But, jokes aside, once Aarshi’s real condition comes out.. oofff..!!! That hit like a truck. No melodrama, no "oh my God tragic background music" just soft, aching reality. Her time is ticking, and she's clinging to this dream of seeing her ship. And Anurag? He’s out there making it happen like a damn legend.

The lighthouse scenes? Ohh, those wrecked me. When he carries her up the stairs, like she’s lighter than a feather and heavier than the whole ocean in his heart? Yes, full-on Titanic mode... except no icebergs. Only emotional ones.

And when that ship with the red sail actually comes into the harbour?? Just when you think life’s a joke, the universe delivers one perfect moment.

I swear to God, if I had been in that lighthouse, I would’ve ugly-cried so hard that those seagulls would’ve been personally concerned.

Now, keeping it real...
The story does get a little wordy at times. Like, you know when your friend’s telling a great story but keeps adding "and then this happened... and THEN that happened..." yes, a little bit of that. Could’ve tightened some parts without losing the magic.

But honestly? When the writing is this soulful, who even cares. I was too busy feeling things I haven’t processed since I saw the movie Up as a kid.

Finally...
This story is a quiet punch in the gut about dreams, promises, and those people you meet once and never, ever forget. Also, reminder to self: next time someone wants a red-sailed toy ship? Just buy it, no questions asked. You never know what it might mean to them.

Godspeed, Aarshi. And Anurag.. you absolute, stubborn legend.

Vinci, you owe me emotional reparations, bro..!!​

Vakharia, I’m honestly speechless after reading your review of A White Ship with a Red Sail. You’ve got me over here grinning, tearing up, and laughing all at once with your incredible words! The way you described Anurag’s Bollywood-hero vibes, Aarshi’s fairy-tale fragility, and that gut-punch of a lighthouse scene—man, you painted my story better than I could’ve dreamed. I’m beyond honored that it hooked you from the port to that final red sail.
Your love for the market scene, the shopkeeper’s Gandalf-level sass, and Anurag’s stubborn legend energy means the world. And when you said the ship’s arrival was the universe delivering one perfect moment? I’m not crying, you’re crying! (Okay, maybe we’re both crying with those seagulls watching.)
I hear you on the wordy bits—point taken! I’ll definitely keep that in mind to tighten things up without losing the magic, as you so perfectly put it. Your feedback is like gold, balancing so much heart with super helpful honesty.
I don't know why I do it, but it is a lack in my writing that I don't tell a story, I show my story. And sometimes, I do it while pointing them towards the scene, when this can be good, but I certainly overdo it, nobody likes it if I spoon-feed them. I am working on this, and hopefully will overcome it one day.
Thank you for diving into Anurag and Aarshi’s world and sharing such a raw, hilarious, and soulful reaction. You don’t know how much this fuels me to keep writing. Emotional reparations? I owe you for this review, bro!
With gratitude

 

[vakharia]

Vakharia, I’m honestly speechless after reading your review of A White Ship with a Red Sail. You’ve got me over here grinning, tearing up, and laughing all at once with your incredible words! The way you described Anurag’s Bollywood-hero vibes, Aarshi’s fairy-tale fragility, and that gut-punch of a lighthouse scene—man, you painted my story better than I could’ve dreamed. I’m beyond honored that it hooked you from the port to that final red sail.
Your love for the market scene, the shopkeeper’s Gandalf-level sass, and Anurag’s stubborn legend energy means the world. And when you said the ship’s arrival was the universe delivering one perfect moment? I’m not crying, you’re crying! (Okay, maybe we’re both crying with those seagulls watching.)
I hear you on the wordy bits—point taken! I’ll definitely keep that in mind to tighten things up without losing the magic, as you so perfectly put it. Your feedback is like gold, balancing so much heart with super helpful honesty.
I don't know why I do it, but it is a lack in my writing that I don't tell a story, I show my story. And sometimes, I do it while pointing them towards the scene, when this can be good, but I certainly overdo it, nobody likes it if I spoon-feed them. I am working on this, and hopefully will overcome it one day.
Thank you for diving into Anurag and Aarshi’s world and sharing such a raw, hilarious, and soulful reaction. You don’t know how much this fuels me to keep writing. Emotional reparations? I owe you for this review, bro!
With gratitude

I’m seriously honored (and a little emotional... blame the seagulls) that my chaotic rant could capture even a fraction of the soul you poured into Anurag and Aarshi’s journey. Your story didn’t just show... it teleported me straight into that lighthouse, red sail and all. And honestly? Spoon-feeding or not, your scenes taste like poetry dipped in adventure.

Keep weaving that magic, Vinci !! The world needs more of these 'perfect moments' you create. Also, I am always ready for more emotional damage, just sayin’...!!

Big respect and bigger hugs back! ​

 

[Vinci]

Writer - Vinci
Story genre - adultery

Story summary:
The story depicts a family grappling with the mother's terminal illness. The father, Ravi, experiences inappropriate sexual arousal towards his daughter, Neha, and ultimately r*p*s her.

Positive point - Depiction of Atmosphere: The author does create a strong sense of atmosphere, particularly in the initial sections describing the oppressive environment of the sickroom. Details like the "soft whirl of the ceiling fan," "canvas of shadows cast by the setting sun," and "faint beep of the heart monitor" effectively establish the mood of grief and impending loss.

Negativee point:
* Character Inconsistencies: The father's sudden and extreme shift from a grieving caregiver to a sexual abuser is jarring and unconvincing. While emotional distress can lead to complex behavior, the text doesn't provide a credible psychological foundation for this transformation.

* Lack of Moral Compass: The narrative lacks a clear moral compass. There's no strong condemnation of the father's actions within the text itself, which can leave the reader with a sense of unease and a lack of resolution.

* Short verdict
The writing has its merits, but the scene is extremely disturbing."


While the story is well-written, the incest between the father and daughter is extremely disturbing, primarily because it was committed without the girl's consent."

Adirshi Yug Purush
इस स्टोरी को कृपया देखे इसमें बिना लड़की की अनुमति के उसके साथ relation बनाया गया है । एक तरह हम उसे r*p* ही कहते हैं।
बहुत disturbing सीन है।

Rating 4.5/10

Thanks, dude, for reading my story and reviewing it. I'm glad that you like the writing style and the atmospheric build-up. I am also glad that you don't like the subject and you find it disturbing, you know what I mean.
Thanks again for reading it

 

[Daredevil420]

Writer : Daredevil420
Story genre - murder mystery

* Story summary : कहानी दिल्ली में एक न्यू ईयर पार्टी में हुई अर्पिता मल्होत्रा नाम की एक महिला की हत्या के बारे में है। इंस्पेक्टर ईशान वर्मा मामले की जांच करते हैं और कई संदिग्धों को पाते हैं, जिनमें अर्पिता की बहन, एक क्लाइंट, और एक दोस्त शामिल हैं। अंत में, पता चलता है कि उसकी सौतेली बहन ने उसे ज़हर दिया था।

Positive point
* Suspense and tension: कहानी की शुरुआत से ही एक रहस्यमय माहौल बनाया गया है। जैसे-जैसे जांच आगे बढ़ती है, तनाव बढ़ता जाता है, जिससे पाठक बांधे रहते हैं। अर्पिता की हत्या के आसपास की परिस्थितियाँ, कई संदिग्धों का होना, और हर एक के अपने रहस्य कहानी को आकर्षक बनाते हैं।

* Character Development: कहानी में कई पात्र हैं, और प्रत्येक का अपना एक अलग व्यक्तित्व और पृष्ठभूमि है। इंस्पेक्टर ईशान वर्मा का चरित्र विशेष रूप से अच्छी तरह से विकसित किया गया है, एक तेजतर्रार जासूस के रूप में जो सच्चाई को उजागर करने के लिए दृढ़ है।

* Negativee point
Too many Suspects: कहानी में बहुत सारे संदिग्ध हैं, जिनमें से प्रत्येक का हत्या करने का एक संभावित कारण है। इससे पाठक के लिए यह अनुमान लगाना मुश्किल हो जाता है कि असली हत्यारा कौन है, और यह कहानी को थोड़ा भ्रमित करने वाला बना सकता है।

* Lack of description: कुछ जगहों पर, जो कुछ भी बताया गया है, वह थोड़ा कमज़ोर लगता है। उदाहरण के लिए, घटनाओं और दृश्यों को और अच्छे से बताया जा सकता था, ताकि पाठक उन्हें और बेहतर ढंग से सोच सकें। माहौल कैसा था और पात्र कैसा महसूस कर रहे थे, इसे और गहराई से दिखाया जा सकता था।

* Short verdict :
"रहस्य अच्छा है, पर कहानी थोड़ी उलझी हुई और वर्णन कमज़ोर है। फिर भी, पढ़ने लायक है।"

Overall it's a good
Rating 6.5/10

Bhai try bahut din baad ki hai story writing ki, aage sudhar karunga apne stories me bhul chuk ke liye maafi