Update-218(Drunk Again)
Babhi ka ultimatum tha 20 minutes ka or mujhe 1 ghantey se jyaada lagne waala tha toh gaali padni pakki thi.. Then maine Shoes k liye call kiya toh unke pass bhi bhenchod sabse mehnge shoes jo they Nike Air Mag usme mera size nahi tha 65 lakh k juttey they bhenchod, Abhi leleta miljaate toh.. Uske baad unke pass jo second they woh maine kal pehne he they issliye maine unke 3rd costliest shoes leliye jo mujhe almost 11 lakh k paddey or woh haweli pohanch jaaenge mujhse pehle..
Main-Jaldi karbe itana time nahi hai..
Ab kareeb 25 minutes baad ekdum fresh cut k sath main ready tha bhenchod kya lag raha hun main.. Fucking hell.. Ab main jaldi se nikala 7 bajne waale they almost nikala he tha ki mera phone fir baja abki baar Abeer ka call tha..
Abeer- Kahaan haibe tu??
Main-Aagaya bus 5 minutes mein...
Abeer - Tu ghar he naa aaya hai abhitak?? Bhosdk.. Babhi bolrahi tu ready horaha hoga as tere kapde aagaye they .. Abe Delhi gaya tha baal katwaane bawligand..
Main-Abe aaraha hun 5-10 minutes mein..
Abeer - 10 Minutes?? Matlab 20-25 minutes toh lagengi tujhe.. Idhar baraat ready hai nikalne k liye literally abhi k abhi.. Or tu 20 minutes mein aaega fir nahaaega ready hoga..
Main-Don't worry Turant ready hounga..
Abeer - Bhosdk.. Jab toh sota raha..
Abeer-Ek kaam kar bhosdk.. Main nahi aaraha teri gand marwa jaa.. Mere bina jaake dikha... Abtoh bilkul nahi aaunga yahaan se he daru peeke fir aaunga or fir ready hounga then chalenge.. 2 ghantey lagaake chal or jaa jaake babhi ko bhi boldena..Bhosdk dimag khaa le mera.. Utha tha tabse yahi baat suni hai ek..
Abeer- Teri gand tod dunga main..
Main-Todtey rehna baadmein lekin abhi 2 ghantey nahi aaraha main.. Jaa karle kya karega..
Ye bolke maine call cut ki.. Abtoh jaaunga bhi nahi bc.. Bhenchod.. Dimag khaalo mera.. Ek banda hai kitana sunaoge uko.. Ab bulaake dikhao, mujhse dheeth thodi hai koi..
Ab ye bolke maine pehla theka dekhtey he gaadi roukki.. Theka normal tha sabse mehngi Red lable he milli mujhe wahaan toh maine wahi lelee or wahin se thoda chakkna or paani wagairaah leliya and waapis aaya gaadi mein or doobara kissi ka phone aaye usase pehle ek large peg banaaya or gatak gaya..Ab kal waali situation hui afeem k uppar daru jami nahi lekin aaj vomiting jarur hui jo expected tha maine aaraam se vomiting ki and hath munh dhoke firse banaya ek peg.. Ab karo phone mere pass.. Mera ye Kehte he mera phone baja jo babhi ka tha maine uthaya..
Babhi-Tu abhi tak ghar bhi nahi aaya hai?? Mujhe laga tu naha raha hai.. AP baraat ready hai tera he wait hai..
Main- 1-2 ghanta lagega babhi Minimum..
Babhi - Kyun? Kya kar raha hai aisa??
Main-Kuch nahi bus time pass..
Babhi-AP main majaak nahi kar rahi..
Main-Main bhi babhi.. 2 ghantey se pehle aajaaunga. Ab Ruth gaya main..
Babhi - Ab kisne kya bola tujhe??
Main-Ye jaanwar ne..
Babhi-Toh ab aaja main bolti hun usko..
Main-2 ghantey babhi or agar mujhe baar baar call ki toh timer badh bhi shakta hai ye dhyaan rakhne kaa.. Jaake dikhao mere bina.. Usase pehle main nahi aane waala..
Babhi-AP i swear to God..
Main-Byee...
Call disconnected..
Babhi ne fir call kiye maine cut kiya, kal gaali toh khaani he hain toh theek se he khaa lenge.. Main laga ab peg pe peg bananey Jaanwar ka call aaya Sam Ravi sabka maine cut he kiya.. Lund uthaaega call mera.. Lekin fir aaya bhai ka call jo mere lund ko nahi mujhe he uthana tha..
Main-Ji bhai..
Deva-Kya kar raha hai AP aise bacho jaise nahi kartey.. Ladki waale wait kar rahe hain unko yun khadda nahi rakhtey.. kabse wait horaha hai tera.. Kahaan hai tu?? 1 minute ka bhi time nahi hai AP..
Main-Kitani derr mein aaun??
Deva-Abhi se peene laga tu? Arrey baraat mein jaake peeta..
Main-Arrey jyaada nahi pee bhai.. Aap bolo kitani derr mein aaun..
Deva-Aana toh dekh turant he hai lekin lele 2_3 peg fir aaja jaldi se..
Main-Ok bhai 20 minutes mein aaya.. Net 20...
Deva-Aaja aaja..
Main-Also mujhe kal se pehle koi kuch nahi kahega warna fir nikal jaaunga main..
Deva-Haao baba haao.. Aa toh ek baar..
Call disconnected..
Dekha issliye i love bhai woh samjhtey hain mujhe bhi or responsibilities ko bhi.. Ab mera mood toh bottle khatam karne ka tha but bhai k call k baad maine 2 mega peg banaye jiske baad bus 40-50 ek ML bachi bottle mein jisse maine faink diya or mast ek cigarette peeke main nikala ghar k liye badhiya set hogaya tha main, jyaada nahi but bahot tha.. Hoga kyun nahi bhenchod almost ek bottle dhakaar gaya tu 40 minutes mein..
Ab main ghar pohancha toh baraat k liye gaadiyaan line se khaddi thi andar lawn mein kuch log baithtey they unmein kuch bahaar khaddey they kuch chairs wagairaah pe baithtey they, yaani literally mera he wait horaha tha bc.. Sabne aatey he mujhe khaa jaane waali najron se dekha literally lekin bola koi kuch nahi.. Hehehe, mujhse panga bc..
Khair main sabko bhaari ignore kartey hue andar aaya seedha apne room mein, babhi mere piche piche andar aai unka cehra gusse mein laal tha but woh mujhe kapde dene aai thi mere jo new aaye they..
Babhi - Ab late matt kar fataak se ready hojaa..Dekha na kaise wait hor.. Hoo.. Tune abhi se Sharaab pee lee??
Main-Main.. Main naha raha hun..
Main turant washroom mein ghussa pehle toh fresh hua bhenchod then brush wagairaah karke fir nahaane laga garma garam paani se nahaaya seconds k hissab se and bahaar aake turant kapde change kiye.. Raman ne bhenchod sachmuch 15 lakh k aas pass k kapde bhejdiye they.. Rohit sach bolraha tha.. Thankfully measurements sab set they.. Juttey bhi aagaye they toh maine fataak se pehne and main aaya niche ab mujhe dekh sabko sans aaya..
Mangal - Aao sir aao.. Bhai.. Tujhe kal milta hun..
Main-kal chhod, Main tujhe 3-4 peg maarke fir milta hun..
Bhai-Ready hai.. Chalo.. Abeer baitha sabko ek sath chalna hai..
Main-Jack or Vinny dono yahaan hain?? Meenu k wahaan kon hai??
Bhai - Guards hain kuch..
Main-Kuch?? Naa naa.. Vinny abhi nikal kuch guards leke wahaan
Bhabhi-Tu toh bolraha tha Rana nikal gaya.
Main-Uska kya bharosa bhai fir aagaya ho konsa durr jaana hai.. Risk kyun lena.. Apne sath bhi gaadiyaan jaaengi guards ki.. Kaafile k aage bhi or piche bhi..
Bhai - Are you sure??
Main-Yeah.. 10000%...No risks.. None..
Continued..