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Update-45
Mai zameen par pada hua tha, chin chhil gayi thi to wahaan se halka-2 khoon beh raha tha. Mai intezaar kar raha tha ki koi aaye aur mujhe utha ke le jaaye ki tabhi bheed ne zor-2 se clap karna aur chillana shuru kar diya. Maine dhyaan se suna to sab ke sab 1 rhythm me "Samar Samar" chilla rahe the, mai hairaan ho gaya ki behanchod maine aisa kya kar diya jo sab mera naam leke chilla rahe hain. Thodi der me mere dost bhaagte huye mere paas aa gaye aur unhone mujhe sahaara dekar uthaaya.
Mai--abbe ye sab log mera naam kyon chilla rahe hain?
Amir--abbe chutiye, tu jeet gaya hai.
Mai--kya....
Sameer--haa bhosdike, tune kar dikhaaya. Tu jeet gaya hai bro.
Maine 1 baar finishing line ki taraf dekha to wahaan Ravi khada hokar apne aap par gusse me chilla raha tha, aur bhi racers the jo dukhi ho rahe the.
Mai--bhai ye kaise ho gaya, mai to gir giya tha fir jeeta kaise?
Varun--abbe chodu, girne se pehle tu hawa me tha thodi der to usi time tu ribbon par gir gaya aur tune sabse pehle finishing line paar kari hai.
Bhaanu--bole to ekdum Milkha Singh style me.
Mai ye sunke bada khush hua aur zor se 1 baar chillaya "yessssssss", mere dost bhi meri khushi dekh ke khush huye aur unhone mujhe apne kandhon par utha liya. Un sab ne mujhe kuch der aise hi uthaaye rakha aur maine bhi haath dikhaakar apne supporters ko thanx kaha. Uske baad unhone mujhe utaara aur fir sahaara dekar class me le gaye. Thodi der me wahaan Aanchal aur Arun sir bhi aa gaye, dono hi meri jeet se bahot khush the. Aanchal to turant aake mere gale lag gayi.
Aanchal--tu theek to hai na?
Mai--mai theek hoon baby, nothing to worry about.
Aanchal--tere pair me dobara kuch problem hui hai na, tabhi tu daudte-2 ruk gaya tha beech me.
Mai--haa yaar, pata nahi kaise beech race me pair chatak gaya. Dard ke maare to gaand fatt gayi thi par fir bhi himmat karke daud gaya mai.
Aanchal--nautanki kahin ka....
Thodi der Aanchal mere gale lagi rahi aur fir jab vo peeche hatti to Arun sir mere gale lag gaye.
Arun--shaabash launde, tune to aaj ground fateh kar liya. Bhale hi mai tera teacher hoon par aaj tune mujhe sikhaaya hai ki himmat ho to aadmi kuch bhi kar sakta hai. Congratulations bhai.
Mai--thanx sir, ye aap sab ke bina nahi kar pata mai. Thanx to all of you.
Arun--vaise 400m race abhi baaki hai, vo bhi daudega kya tu?
Mai--naa sir, aaj ke liye itna kaafi hai. Agar vo bhi daud gaya to fir na bachunga mai.
Arun--haa rehne de tu, vaise bhi 1 gold medal to aa hi gaya hai. Tu rest kar ab.
Uske baad Arun sir wahaan se chale gaye, hum sab thodi der class me baithe rahe. Kareeb 1 ghante baad Arun sir ne mujhe call karke ground me bula liya medals distribution ke liye. Mai ground me pahocha to us waqt 100m ke winners ko medals pehnaaye jaa rahe the, thodi der wait karne ke baad 200m race winners ke naam anounce huye to mai chala gaya stage par. Wahaan chief guest ne mujhe gold medal pehnaaya aur saath-2 mujhe shaabashi bhi di mere jasbe ke liye. Uske baad 400m ke winners announce huye to mujhe pata chala ki Ravi ye race jeet gaya tha, saale ki kismat achi thi jo mere pair me dikkat thi varna aaj sirf silver medals hi leke jaata vo. Thodi der hum log school me ruke rahe aur fir wahaan se mai Varun ke saath hospital ke liye nikal gaya, wahaan par Sudha ne meri x-ray report dekhi to usne bataaya ki is baar bhi zyada serious chot nahi hai aur rest karne se mai theek ho jaaunga. Uske baad mai hospital se nikal gaya aur fir Varun ne mujhe mere ghar drop kar diya, jab ghar pe chachi aur dadi ko pata chala ki maine aaj race jeeti hai to vo dono bahot khush hui. Sujata ki to dekhne laayak shakal ho gayi thi, saali ko dekh ke to aisa lag raha tha jaise kisi ne uske bhosde me mirchi bhar di ho. Use aise jalta hua dekhkar mujhe bada maza aa raha tha.
Shaam ko jab papa office se ghar waapis aaye to maine unhe apna gold medal dikhaaya lekin khush hone ke bajaaye vo lage mujhse sawaal karne.
Papa--ye kya hai?
Mai--medal hai aur vo bhi gold.
Papa--ye kiska uthaa laaya tu?
Mai--mera hai, aaj race jeeti hai maine. Usme first prize mila hai mujhe.
Papa--tune race jeeti, kamaal hai kyonki jahaan tak mujhe yaad hai kal tak to tere pair me chot thi, fir kaise race daudi tune?
Mai--papa, himmat-e-marda to madad-e-khuda. Hausla aur himmat hai to kaamyaabi humaare kadam choomegi hi.
Papa--kabhi ye hausla padhai ki taraf bhi dikha liya kar, half yearly exam kab se hai tere.
Mai--abhi mahina bhar hai.
Papa--haan to padhna start kar de kyonki mahina bhar hi hai tere paas. Is baar tu fail hua na to kasam se Rawat ji ki factory me lagwa dunga tujhe.
Mai--arre papa chill, is baar mai pass hoke dikhaaunga aapko.
Papa--ae gadhe, baap ke saamne hoshiyaari mat jhaad, samjha? Chal jaake padhai kar, jaa yahaan se.
Papa ki baat sunke mai apne kamre me jaane laga to beech me chacha mujhe dikh gaye, unhone 1 baar mere gold medal ki taraf dekha aur fir meri taraf dekh ke bol pade.
Chacha--congratulations.
Chacha ne itna hi bola aur fir wahaan se chale gaye, chacha ki baat sunke mai bhi hairaan tha. Pata nahi kitne saalon baad unhone khud aage badhkar mujhse baat ki thi.
Mai(mann me)--ye aaj chacha ko kya ho gaya, inhe samajhna bhi naamumkin hai. Khair inhe chhodo, jaldi se room me chalke kitaabein khol leta hoon varna mera baap meri dusri taang bhi tod dega.
Uske baad mai apne room me chala gaya aur padhai karne laga. Us din ke baad agle 20 din mai school nahi gaya taaki pair ko aaram mil sake, un dino ko maine aaram karne aur padhne me nikaal diya, kabhi-2 beech me time milta to mai Aanchal aur apne dosto ko call karke unse baat kar liya karta tha. Vo sab mujhe bataate the ki school me mere bina sab kuch kaisa chal raha hai aur mujhe bhi unki kahaaniya sunane me bada mazaa aata.
September ka mahina shuru ho gaya tha, is mahine me 2 khaas cheezein thi- pehla to mera exam aur dusra tha mera birthday, aur dono hi cheezon ka mujhe besabri se intezaar tha. Lekin un sabse pehle mujhe 1 aur kaam karna tha aur vo tha badla lena, in 20 dino me maine apne dimaag me Kuldeep ko naa jaane kaise-2 peeta tha aur aaj vo din tha jab mujhe apni soch ko haqiqat me badalna tha.
Mai is waqt hall me baith ke naashta kar raha tha, mera pair poori tarah theek ho chuka tha to mai school jaane ke liye taiyaar hoke baitha hua tha. Thodi der baad papa aaye hall me aur vo bhi mere saath nashta karne baith gaye.
Papa--to aaj school jaa rahe hai janaab?
Mai--haa papa, kaafi din ho gaye school gaye huye. Kaafi syllabus bhi chhoot gaya hoga....
Papa--to tujhe konsa fikar hai uski, tu to pada rehta hai ghar pe. Sun meri baat, ab thoda dhang se rahiyo. Dobaara kisi se ladaai karne ki sochna bhi mat varna mujhse bura koi nahi hoga, samajh gaya na?
Maine haa me gardan hila di aur nashta karne laga, uske baad mai school ke liye nikal gaya. School pahocha to mere dost already aa chuke the, mai unke paas chala gaya aur bakchodi karne laga. Baaki saare students ko shaayad aaj bhi vo race aur meri jeet yaad thi to vo 1-1 karke mere paas aa rahe the aur mujhe congrats bol rahe the aur saath-2 meri haalat ke baare me bhi puch rahe the. Mai bhi sabse pyaar se baat kar raha tha, aaj pata nahi kitne dino baad itna attention mil raha tha to mai kyon na leta. Thodi der baad jab sab chale gaye to mai apne doston ko kone me le gaya.
Varun--bhai, yahaan kyo leke aaya hai?
Mai--teri gaand maarni thi, isliye khopche me leke aaya hoon. Arre bhosdike, kuch baat karni hogi tabhi yahaan leke aaya honga tum logo ko.
Amir--haa to bol na jaldi.
Mai--aaj mere haathon me bahot khujli ho rahi hai, kisi ko tabiyat se pelne ki ichha ho rahi hai to maine socha ki abhi mera badla baaki hai.
Sameer--konsa badla bhai?
Mai--maine tum logo se 1 baat chhipaai thi, mujhe pata tha ki Kuldeep ke alaawa vo launde kon the jinhone mujhe pela tha.
Bhaanu--tujhe pata tha fir tune chhipaaya kyon?
Mai--bataata hoon bhai, poori baat bataata hoon. Actually us din..( fir maine us din hui ghatna ke baare me sab bata diya aur ye bhi bata diya ki maine unse jhoot kyon bola)
Amir--arre behanchod, Kuldeep ke saath vo mall waale 5 laundo ne maara tha tujhe. Unki maa ko chodu, tu bata ab kya karna hai?
Mai--karna kya hai, pelte hai saalo ko.
Bhaanu--kuch plan hai tere paas?
Mai--Amir, tere vo Bittu bhaiya hai na, unhe Kuldeep ka photo bhej aur pata kar ki vo aaj shaam ko kahaan milega. Saale ko aaj wahin jaake maarenge.
Amir--tu chinta mat kar bro, uski maa chod denge aaj. Behan ka loda, bhai ko maara mere. Uski gaand me sariya daal ke pankhe ki tarah ghuma dunga saale ko.
Mai--bas bhai, itna josh nahi chahiye hume.
Uske baad hum log classes me boring teachers ke boring periods attend karne lage, samajh to kuch nahi aa raha tha lekin mai fir bhi koshish kar raha tha gyaan batorne ki. Exams aane waale the aur konsi cheez ki zaroorat kab pad jaaye, kya pata isliye mai boring teachers ke gyaanchodi ko bhi dhyaan se sun raha tha. School khatam hone ke baad mai ghar waapis aa gaya, ghar aake maine khaana khaaya aur fir so gaya. Shaam ko meri neend 6 baje phone bajne ki wajah se khuli, maine phone dekha to call Raghav bhaiya ki thi. Maine call utha li to udhar se Raghav bhaiya ne mujhe gaali bakni shuru kar di.
Raghav--chutiye, haraami, kutte, suar, mausichod, jhaant ke baal....
Mai--arre bhaiya aaram se. Kya ho gaya hai aapko, aise gaaliyan kyon bak rahe ho mujhe?
Raghav--gaaliyan na baku to aur kya karun, tujhe gaaon se gaye 3 mahine se oopar ho gaye hain aur tune 1 baar bhi mujhe phone nahi kiya. Bas yahi bhaaichaara hai na tera.
Mai--sorry bhaiya, vo kya hai na ki mujhe time hi nahi milta aapko call karne ka. Mere khud ki haalat theek nahi rehti aajkal. Vaise aap bataao, kaise ho aap aur gaaon me baaki sab log kaise hain?
Raghav--theek hi hain bhai sab yahaan.
Mai--aur dukaan ke kya haalchaal hain?
Raghav--dukaan ka kaam abhi 10 din pehle hi khatam hua hai, uske baad humne tera sikhaaya hua sab banaa ke bechna shuru kiya to logo ko bahot pasand aaya. Ab lag raha hai bhai ki dukaan chal padegi humaari.
Mai--ye to badi achi khabar hai bhaiya, congrats.
Raghav--acha sun, tujhe 1 aur baat bataani thi mujhe.
Mai--haa bolo na.
Raghav--arre vo Savita bua nahi hai, Rekha bua ki devraani...
Savita ka naam sunte hi mere zehan me vo raat ghoomne lagi jab maine use bache ke liye waada kiya tha. Mai us baat ko bhoolna chahta tha par Raghav bhaiya ne gade murde ukhaad diye the.
Mai--haa kya hua unhe?
Raghav--abbe vo pregnant hai.
Mujhe bhaiya se aise kuch ki hi umeed thi par fir maine socha ki badi late khabar mil rahi hai uski pregnancy ki.
Mai--abhi pehla mahin chal raha hoga?
Raghav--abbe nahi bhai, 3 mahine pregnant hai vo. Vo yahaan gaaon me log aksar teesre mahine ke baad hi ye baat bataate hain. Hume bhi aaj hi pata chala hai, Rekha bua ne kaha tha tujhe bataane ko isliye bata diya maine.
Mai(mann me)--matlab mera hi bacha hai, ye le Samar, free fund me baap bhi ban gaya tu.
Mai--achi khabar hai bhaiya, acha bhaiya, suno mujhe kuch kaam hai to mai aap se baad me baat karta hoon. Bye bhaiya.
Uske baad maine call kaat di aur chupchaap bed par baith ke sochne laga, 1 baat to clear thi ki ye khabar mujh tak Savita ne hi pahochwaai hai varna Rekha mausi ko kya padi thi jo vo mujhe ye khabar bataane ke liye bolti. Savita pe mujhe bahot gussa aa raha tha, usne mujhse waada kiya tha ki vo is bache ke baare me mujhe kabhi pata nahi chalne degi lekin ab aisi harkatein kar ke vo sirf mujhe gussa dila rahi thi.
Mai kuch der bed pe baitha Savita ke baare me sochta raha aur fir bathroom me ghus gaya fresh hone ke liye. Fresh hone ke baad maine chachi se jaake chai maangi aur fir chai pikar mai padhne baith gaya. Kareeb 7 baje mujhe Amir ka phone aaya, maine turant call utha li.
Mai--haa bhai, kuch pata chala kya?
Amir--bhai, 1 achi khabar hai. Kuldeep is waqt xxxxx ke 1 chhote se theke par hai. Achi khabar ye hai ki vo 5 launde bhi uske saath hai wahaan.
Mai--aur koi to nahi hai na unke saath.
Amir--nahi sirf vo 6 log hi hain, kya karna hai?
Mai--1 kaam kar, tu Amir aur Sameer ko phone kar ke bata us jagah ke baare me aur unke saath wahaan pahoch. Mai Varun ko lekar aata hoon.
Uske baad maine call kaati aur Varun ko call karke scooty leke aane ko kaha, maine use saath me hockey stick laane ko bhi kaha. Uske baad maine kapde pehane aur baahar jaane laga to papa ne mujhe rok diya.
Papa--kahaan jaa raha hai?
Mai--papa, apne dost ke ghar jaa raha hoon. Itne din school nahi gaya tha to uski copy leke aa jaata hoon. Notes complete karne hai na.
Papa--theek hai jaa, par jaldi aana.
Uske baad mai ghar se nikal gaya aur colony ke baahar aakar Varun ka wait karne laga, thodi der me Varun aa gaya scooty leke to mai uske saath us theke ki taraf chal pada. Jab hum us theke ke paas pahoche to wahaan mujhe mere sabhi dost dikh gaye, mai unke paas chala gaya.
Mai--kahaan hai vo log?
Amir--andar baithe huye hain, kya karna hai?
Mai--andar kaafi bheed hogi, police ka lafda ho sakta hai. 1 kaam karte hain, jis raaste se hum aaye hain wahin par unka wait karte hain. Vo sunsaan rasta hai aur saale usi taraf se jaayenge, wahin par gher lenge unko.
Bhaanu--idea to theek hai, par vo 6 hain aur hum 5.
Mai--maa ki choot unki, sab 1 kaam karo. Us din jis-2 ko tumne pela tha, aaj bhi usi se ladna. Varun ye hockey stick mujhe de, mai Kuldeep ke saath-2 ek aur launde se lad lunga.
Amir--aur mai, us din mere waale ne to mujhe lagbhag pel diya tha.
Mai--abbe fattu, vo sab piye huye honge. Ghanta humse nahi lad paayenge. Chalo wahin chalte hain jahaan unko gherna hai, aaj maar-2 ke bhoot bana dunga behan ke laudo ka
Uske baad hum log us raaste par aa gaye jahaan par humne unhe gherne ka plan banaaya tha, wahaan par khade hokar mai sutta sulgaane laga. Thodi der baad vo log hume bike par aate dikhe to humne beech road par apni scooty laga di. Vo log ruk gaye aur hume dekhne lage, jaise hi Kuldeep ki nazar mujh pe padi to uski gaand fattne ko ho gayi.
Mai--aur beta, aaj kis khushi me chadha li maadarchod.
Kuldeep--tu yahaan kya kar raha hai?
Mai--tere saath ludo khelne aaya hoon, abbe chutiye. Thoda to apna dimaag lada, maarne hi aaya honga.
Kuldeep--tu ye galat kar raha hai.
Mai--maa ki choot teri, maaro sabko.....
Uske baad hum sab log unki taraf daude, unhone apni bike chaalu karke bhaagne ki koshish ki lekin humne unhe pakad liya aur unhe zameen par gira diya. Uske baad to wahaan jung ka maahol ban gaya, hum sabhi log unke nashe me hone ka faayeda utha rahe the aur unhe kutton ki tarah maar rahe the. Mai to akela Kuldeep aur us launde se lad raha tha jisse meri pichli baar ladaai hui thi. Kuldeep mujhe maarne ke liye meri taraf aaya to maine uske pet me laat de maari, tab tak us launde ne peeche se aage mujhe pakadne ki koshish ki to maine uski taang par hockey stick de maari. Vo dard ke maare zameen par baith gaya to maine uske mooh par laat de maari, uske baad maine uski taango par hockey stick se maarna shuru kar diya. Vo dard se karaahta raha par maine uspe koi reham na dikhaaya, itne me meri nazar padi Kuldeep pe jo khada ho gaya tha to mai uske paas gaya aur uski peeth par hockey stick de maari. Vo apne haath apni peeth par le gaya sehlaane ke liye to maine uski hatheli par 1 aur hockey stick de maari, uske baad to maine uske shareer par hockey stick maar-2 ke uska bhoot bana diya. Mai fir badal-2 ke un dono ko pelne laga, kabhi mai Kuldeep ko maarta to kabhi mai us dusre launde ko maarta. Mere doston ne bhi baaki sab ki achi khaasi thukaai kar di thi, jab vo sab zameen par gir gaye to humne 1 naya kaaryakaram shuru kiya. Hum paancho baari-2 se 1-1 karke un logo ko mil kar peetne lage, koi bhaagne ki koshish karta to usko pakad ke zameen par giraate aur fir use pelne lagte. Un logo ki zabardast thukaai ke baad jab hum thak gaye to hum thodi der ruk gaye.
Mai--arre maadarchod, saans fool gayi meri to. Bhaanu bro, 1 sutta de zara.
Bhaanu ne 1 sutta jalaaya aur fir mujhe de diya, mai sutta pite huye Kuldeep ki taraf badhne laga. Mai uske paas jaake baith gaya, uski poori body maar padne ki wajah se sooj gayi thi.
Mai--kyon bhai, aaj pata chala na ki kaisa lagta hai jab akele ko 5-6 log mil ke maarte hain. Samajh aaya ya mai dobaara samjhaaun.
Kuldeep--mai samajh gaya bhai, mujhe maaf kar de. Agli baar se mai kabhi tujhse panga nahi lunga. Mujhe jaane de aaj.
Mai--aise kaise behanchod, suno bhai log. Round 2 start karte hain.
Uske baad hum logo ne fir se un logo ko pelna shuru kar diya, is baar to maine aur tabiyat se un logo ko pela. Jab mann bhar gaya to hum un logo ko aise hi zameen par pada hua chhodkar jaane lage, kuch door chalne ke baad mujhe kuch yaad aaya to mai waapis Kuldeep ki taraf badh gaya. Mai uske paas pahocha to maine dekha ki vo mere jaane ke baad bada khush ho raha tha ki bach gaya lekin jaise hi uski nazar mujh pe padi to uske chehre par fir se khauf aa gaya.
Kuldeep--ab kya ho gaya, itna to maar liya. Ab kya chahta hai tu?
Mai--hisaab baraabar karna chahta hoon. Khada karo be ise.
Mere dosto ne use pakad ke khada kiya aur mai uske peeche aa gaya, maine apna poora zor lagaake uske ghutne me laat de maari to uski dard ke maare 1 cheekh chhoot gayi. Vo neeche baithne laga par maine apne dosto se use dobaara khada karne ko kaha, jaise hi vo khada hua to maine 1 aur laat uske ghutne me de maari. Is baar uske ghutne se kadak ki aawaz aayi, vo zameen par baithne laga to mere dosto ne use chhod diya. Vo zameen par let gaya aur dard ke maare karhaane laga, mai uske paas baitha aur uske kaan me bol pada.
Mai--ab hisaab baraabar hua bro, agli baar sach me mat dikhna varna isse bhi bura haal karunga tera. Samajh gaya na?
Kuldeep--tune ye theek nahi kiya, ab tu nahi bachega. Mai kal subah police me teri complaint kar dunga, fir police dhang se tel lagaake teri gaand maaregi.
Kuldeep ki baat sunke mujhe hasi aa gayi aur mai zor-2 se hasne laga, vo mujhe hairaan hoke dekhe jaa raha tha, use to lag raha tha ki mai paagal ho gaya hoon.
Mai--hahaha......sorry haan bro. Vo kya hai na ki teri baat itni funny thi ki mai apni hasi rok nahi paaya. Vaise bro, tu kal meri complaint karega to mujhe zyaada se zyaada 6 mahine ya 1 saal ki saza hogi par agar Aanchal ne teri complaint kar di ki tune school me use assault karne ki koshish ki thi to tera kya hoga. Assault and attempt to rape ka case banega, kam se kam 7 saal ki saza hogi tujhe. Jab baahar aayega to sab tujhe rapist keh ke bulaayenge, arre vo to bahot baad ki baat hai. Kya keh raha tha tu ki police tel lagaake meri gaand maaregi, arre jab tu tihaar jaayega na to wahaan baaki kaidi bina tel lagaaye teri gaand maarenge, arre re mujhe to soch ke bhi darr lag raha hai. Bol, jaayega jail?
Kuldeep--nahi, mai jail nahi jaaunga. Mai nahi jaaunga jail.
Mai--to bhosdike apna mooh band rakhna, agar aaj ki baat kisi ko pata chali to yaad rakhna ki tera kya haal kar sakta hoon mai. 1 baat aur, don't ever try to play these mind games with me. Mai Samar hoon, koi raah chalta chindi nahi jo teri in ghatiya baaton me fas jaayega. Samjha?
Usne haa me sar hilaaya to mai khada hua aur uski gaand par 1 laat de maari, vo dard se chilla pada to mujhe bada sukoon mila. Uske baad hum paancho wahaan se nikal gaye apne-2 ghar ki taraf, wahaan se nikalne se pehle maine ambulance ko call karke unki location bata di taaki kahin bhosdiwaale marr na jaaye. Ghar jaane se pehle mai Varun ke saath uske ghar chala gaya aur usse 2-3 copies leke apne ghar waapis aa gaya.
Mai zameen par pada hua tha, chin chhil gayi thi to wahaan se halka-2 khoon beh raha tha. Mai intezaar kar raha tha ki koi aaye aur mujhe utha ke le jaaye ki tabhi bheed ne zor-2 se clap karna aur chillana shuru kar diya. Maine dhyaan se suna to sab ke sab 1 rhythm me "Samar Samar" chilla rahe the, mai hairaan ho gaya ki behanchod maine aisa kya kar diya jo sab mera naam leke chilla rahe hain. Thodi der me mere dost bhaagte huye mere paas aa gaye aur unhone mujhe sahaara dekar uthaaya.
Mai--abbe ye sab log mera naam kyon chilla rahe hain?
Amir--abbe chutiye, tu jeet gaya hai.
Mai--kya....
Sameer--haa bhosdike, tune kar dikhaaya. Tu jeet gaya hai bro.
Maine 1 baar finishing line ki taraf dekha to wahaan Ravi khada hokar apne aap par gusse me chilla raha tha, aur bhi racers the jo dukhi ho rahe the.
Mai--bhai ye kaise ho gaya, mai to gir giya tha fir jeeta kaise?
Varun--abbe chodu, girne se pehle tu hawa me tha thodi der to usi time tu ribbon par gir gaya aur tune sabse pehle finishing line paar kari hai.
Bhaanu--bole to ekdum Milkha Singh style me.
Mai ye sunke bada khush hua aur zor se 1 baar chillaya "yessssssss", mere dost bhi meri khushi dekh ke khush huye aur unhone mujhe apne kandhon par utha liya. Un sab ne mujhe kuch der aise hi uthaaye rakha aur maine bhi haath dikhaakar apne supporters ko thanx kaha. Uske baad unhone mujhe utaara aur fir sahaara dekar class me le gaye. Thodi der me wahaan Aanchal aur Arun sir bhi aa gaye, dono hi meri jeet se bahot khush the. Aanchal to turant aake mere gale lag gayi.
Aanchal--tu theek to hai na?
Mai--mai theek hoon baby, nothing to worry about.
Aanchal--tere pair me dobara kuch problem hui hai na, tabhi tu daudte-2 ruk gaya tha beech me.
Mai--haa yaar, pata nahi kaise beech race me pair chatak gaya. Dard ke maare to gaand fatt gayi thi par fir bhi himmat karke daud gaya mai.
Aanchal--nautanki kahin ka....
Thodi der Aanchal mere gale lagi rahi aur fir jab vo peeche hatti to Arun sir mere gale lag gaye.
Arun--shaabash launde, tune to aaj ground fateh kar liya. Bhale hi mai tera teacher hoon par aaj tune mujhe sikhaaya hai ki himmat ho to aadmi kuch bhi kar sakta hai. Congratulations bhai.
Mai--thanx sir, ye aap sab ke bina nahi kar pata mai. Thanx to all of you.
Arun--vaise 400m race abhi baaki hai, vo bhi daudega kya tu?
Mai--naa sir, aaj ke liye itna kaafi hai. Agar vo bhi daud gaya to fir na bachunga mai.
Arun--haa rehne de tu, vaise bhi 1 gold medal to aa hi gaya hai. Tu rest kar ab.
Uske baad Arun sir wahaan se chale gaye, hum sab thodi der class me baithe rahe. Kareeb 1 ghante baad Arun sir ne mujhe call karke ground me bula liya medals distribution ke liye. Mai ground me pahocha to us waqt 100m ke winners ko medals pehnaaye jaa rahe the, thodi der wait karne ke baad 200m race winners ke naam anounce huye to mai chala gaya stage par. Wahaan chief guest ne mujhe gold medal pehnaaya aur saath-2 mujhe shaabashi bhi di mere jasbe ke liye. Uske baad 400m ke winners announce huye to mujhe pata chala ki Ravi ye race jeet gaya tha, saale ki kismat achi thi jo mere pair me dikkat thi varna aaj sirf silver medals hi leke jaata vo. Thodi der hum log school me ruke rahe aur fir wahaan se mai Varun ke saath hospital ke liye nikal gaya, wahaan par Sudha ne meri x-ray report dekhi to usne bataaya ki is baar bhi zyada serious chot nahi hai aur rest karne se mai theek ho jaaunga. Uske baad mai hospital se nikal gaya aur fir Varun ne mujhe mere ghar drop kar diya, jab ghar pe chachi aur dadi ko pata chala ki maine aaj race jeeti hai to vo dono bahot khush hui. Sujata ki to dekhne laayak shakal ho gayi thi, saali ko dekh ke to aisa lag raha tha jaise kisi ne uske bhosde me mirchi bhar di ho. Use aise jalta hua dekhkar mujhe bada maza aa raha tha.
Shaam ko jab papa office se ghar waapis aaye to maine unhe apna gold medal dikhaaya lekin khush hone ke bajaaye vo lage mujhse sawaal karne.
Papa--ye kya hai?
Mai--medal hai aur vo bhi gold.
Papa--ye kiska uthaa laaya tu?
Mai--mera hai, aaj race jeeti hai maine. Usme first prize mila hai mujhe.
Papa--tune race jeeti, kamaal hai kyonki jahaan tak mujhe yaad hai kal tak to tere pair me chot thi, fir kaise race daudi tune?
Mai--papa, himmat-e-marda to madad-e-khuda. Hausla aur himmat hai to kaamyaabi humaare kadam choomegi hi.
Papa--kabhi ye hausla padhai ki taraf bhi dikha liya kar, half yearly exam kab se hai tere.
Mai--abhi mahina bhar hai.
Papa--haan to padhna start kar de kyonki mahina bhar hi hai tere paas. Is baar tu fail hua na to kasam se Rawat ji ki factory me lagwa dunga tujhe.
Mai--arre papa chill, is baar mai pass hoke dikhaaunga aapko.
Papa--ae gadhe, baap ke saamne hoshiyaari mat jhaad, samjha? Chal jaake padhai kar, jaa yahaan se.
Papa ki baat sunke mai apne kamre me jaane laga to beech me chacha mujhe dikh gaye, unhone 1 baar mere gold medal ki taraf dekha aur fir meri taraf dekh ke bol pade.
Chacha--congratulations.
Chacha ne itna hi bola aur fir wahaan se chale gaye, chacha ki baat sunke mai bhi hairaan tha. Pata nahi kitne saalon baad unhone khud aage badhkar mujhse baat ki thi.
Mai(mann me)--ye aaj chacha ko kya ho gaya, inhe samajhna bhi naamumkin hai. Khair inhe chhodo, jaldi se room me chalke kitaabein khol leta hoon varna mera baap meri dusri taang bhi tod dega.
Uske baad mai apne room me chala gaya aur padhai karne laga. Us din ke baad agle 20 din mai school nahi gaya taaki pair ko aaram mil sake, un dino ko maine aaram karne aur padhne me nikaal diya, kabhi-2 beech me time milta to mai Aanchal aur apne dosto ko call karke unse baat kar liya karta tha. Vo sab mujhe bataate the ki school me mere bina sab kuch kaisa chal raha hai aur mujhe bhi unki kahaaniya sunane me bada mazaa aata.
September ka mahina shuru ho gaya tha, is mahine me 2 khaas cheezein thi- pehla to mera exam aur dusra tha mera birthday, aur dono hi cheezon ka mujhe besabri se intezaar tha. Lekin un sabse pehle mujhe 1 aur kaam karna tha aur vo tha badla lena, in 20 dino me maine apne dimaag me Kuldeep ko naa jaane kaise-2 peeta tha aur aaj vo din tha jab mujhe apni soch ko haqiqat me badalna tha.
Mai is waqt hall me baith ke naashta kar raha tha, mera pair poori tarah theek ho chuka tha to mai school jaane ke liye taiyaar hoke baitha hua tha. Thodi der baad papa aaye hall me aur vo bhi mere saath nashta karne baith gaye.
Papa--to aaj school jaa rahe hai janaab?
Mai--haa papa, kaafi din ho gaye school gaye huye. Kaafi syllabus bhi chhoot gaya hoga....
Papa--to tujhe konsa fikar hai uski, tu to pada rehta hai ghar pe. Sun meri baat, ab thoda dhang se rahiyo. Dobaara kisi se ladaai karne ki sochna bhi mat varna mujhse bura koi nahi hoga, samajh gaya na?
Maine haa me gardan hila di aur nashta karne laga, uske baad mai school ke liye nikal gaya. School pahocha to mere dost already aa chuke the, mai unke paas chala gaya aur bakchodi karne laga. Baaki saare students ko shaayad aaj bhi vo race aur meri jeet yaad thi to vo 1-1 karke mere paas aa rahe the aur mujhe congrats bol rahe the aur saath-2 meri haalat ke baare me bhi puch rahe the. Mai bhi sabse pyaar se baat kar raha tha, aaj pata nahi kitne dino baad itna attention mil raha tha to mai kyon na leta. Thodi der baad jab sab chale gaye to mai apne doston ko kone me le gaya.
Varun--bhai, yahaan kyo leke aaya hai?
Mai--teri gaand maarni thi, isliye khopche me leke aaya hoon. Arre bhosdike, kuch baat karni hogi tabhi yahaan leke aaya honga tum logo ko.
Amir--haa to bol na jaldi.
Mai--aaj mere haathon me bahot khujli ho rahi hai, kisi ko tabiyat se pelne ki ichha ho rahi hai to maine socha ki abhi mera badla baaki hai.
Sameer--konsa badla bhai?
Mai--maine tum logo se 1 baat chhipaai thi, mujhe pata tha ki Kuldeep ke alaawa vo launde kon the jinhone mujhe pela tha.
Bhaanu--tujhe pata tha fir tune chhipaaya kyon?
Mai--bataata hoon bhai, poori baat bataata hoon. Actually us din..( fir maine us din hui ghatna ke baare me sab bata diya aur ye bhi bata diya ki maine unse jhoot kyon bola)
Amir--arre behanchod, Kuldeep ke saath vo mall waale 5 laundo ne maara tha tujhe. Unki maa ko chodu, tu bata ab kya karna hai?
Mai--karna kya hai, pelte hai saalo ko.
Bhaanu--kuch plan hai tere paas?
Mai--Amir, tere vo Bittu bhaiya hai na, unhe Kuldeep ka photo bhej aur pata kar ki vo aaj shaam ko kahaan milega. Saale ko aaj wahin jaake maarenge.
Amir--tu chinta mat kar bro, uski maa chod denge aaj. Behan ka loda, bhai ko maara mere. Uski gaand me sariya daal ke pankhe ki tarah ghuma dunga saale ko.
Mai--bas bhai, itna josh nahi chahiye hume.
Uske baad hum log classes me boring teachers ke boring periods attend karne lage, samajh to kuch nahi aa raha tha lekin mai fir bhi koshish kar raha tha gyaan batorne ki. Exams aane waale the aur konsi cheez ki zaroorat kab pad jaaye, kya pata isliye mai boring teachers ke gyaanchodi ko bhi dhyaan se sun raha tha. School khatam hone ke baad mai ghar waapis aa gaya, ghar aake maine khaana khaaya aur fir so gaya. Shaam ko meri neend 6 baje phone bajne ki wajah se khuli, maine phone dekha to call Raghav bhaiya ki thi. Maine call utha li to udhar se Raghav bhaiya ne mujhe gaali bakni shuru kar di.
Raghav--chutiye, haraami, kutte, suar, mausichod, jhaant ke baal....
Mai--arre bhaiya aaram se. Kya ho gaya hai aapko, aise gaaliyan kyon bak rahe ho mujhe?
Raghav--gaaliyan na baku to aur kya karun, tujhe gaaon se gaye 3 mahine se oopar ho gaye hain aur tune 1 baar bhi mujhe phone nahi kiya. Bas yahi bhaaichaara hai na tera.
Mai--sorry bhaiya, vo kya hai na ki mujhe time hi nahi milta aapko call karne ka. Mere khud ki haalat theek nahi rehti aajkal. Vaise aap bataao, kaise ho aap aur gaaon me baaki sab log kaise hain?
Raghav--theek hi hain bhai sab yahaan.
Mai--aur dukaan ke kya haalchaal hain?
Raghav--dukaan ka kaam abhi 10 din pehle hi khatam hua hai, uske baad humne tera sikhaaya hua sab banaa ke bechna shuru kiya to logo ko bahot pasand aaya. Ab lag raha hai bhai ki dukaan chal padegi humaari.
Mai--ye to badi achi khabar hai bhaiya, congrats.
Raghav--acha sun, tujhe 1 aur baat bataani thi mujhe.
Mai--haa bolo na.
Raghav--arre vo Savita bua nahi hai, Rekha bua ki devraani...
Savita ka naam sunte hi mere zehan me vo raat ghoomne lagi jab maine use bache ke liye waada kiya tha. Mai us baat ko bhoolna chahta tha par Raghav bhaiya ne gade murde ukhaad diye the.
Mai--haa kya hua unhe?
Raghav--abbe vo pregnant hai.
Mujhe bhaiya se aise kuch ki hi umeed thi par fir maine socha ki badi late khabar mil rahi hai uski pregnancy ki.
Mai--abhi pehla mahin chal raha hoga?
Raghav--abbe nahi bhai, 3 mahine pregnant hai vo. Vo yahaan gaaon me log aksar teesre mahine ke baad hi ye baat bataate hain. Hume bhi aaj hi pata chala hai, Rekha bua ne kaha tha tujhe bataane ko isliye bata diya maine.
Mai(mann me)--matlab mera hi bacha hai, ye le Samar, free fund me baap bhi ban gaya tu.
Mai--achi khabar hai bhaiya, acha bhaiya, suno mujhe kuch kaam hai to mai aap se baad me baat karta hoon. Bye bhaiya.
Uske baad maine call kaat di aur chupchaap bed par baith ke sochne laga, 1 baat to clear thi ki ye khabar mujh tak Savita ne hi pahochwaai hai varna Rekha mausi ko kya padi thi jo vo mujhe ye khabar bataane ke liye bolti. Savita pe mujhe bahot gussa aa raha tha, usne mujhse waada kiya tha ki vo is bache ke baare me mujhe kabhi pata nahi chalne degi lekin ab aisi harkatein kar ke vo sirf mujhe gussa dila rahi thi.
Mai kuch der bed pe baitha Savita ke baare me sochta raha aur fir bathroom me ghus gaya fresh hone ke liye. Fresh hone ke baad maine chachi se jaake chai maangi aur fir chai pikar mai padhne baith gaya. Kareeb 7 baje mujhe Amir ka phone aaya, maine turant call utha li.
Mai--haa bhai, kuch pata chala kya?
Amir--bhai, 1 achi khabar hai. Kuldeep is waqt xxxxx ke 1 chhote se theke par hai. Achi khabar ye hai ki vo 5 launde bhi uske saath hai wahaan.
Mai--aur koi to nahi hai na unke saath.
Amir--nahi sirf vo 6 log hi hain, kya karna hai?
Mai--1 kaam kar, tu Amir aur Sameer ko phone kar ke bata us jagah ke baare me aur unke saath wahaan pahoch. Mai Varun ko lekar aata hoon.
Uske baad maine call kaati aur Varun ko call karke scooty leke aane ko kaha, maine use saath me hockey stick laane ko bhi kaha. Uske baad maine kapde pehane aur baahar jaane laga to papa ne mujhe rok diya.
Papa--kahaan jaa raha hai?
Mai--papa, apne dost ke ghar jaa raha hoon. Itne din school nahi gaya tha to uski copy leke aa jaata hoon. Notes complete karne hai na.
Papa--theek hai jaa, par jaldi aana.
Uske baad mai ghar se nikal gaya aur colony ke baahar aakar Varun ka wait karne laga, thodi der me Varun aa gaya scooty leke to mai uske saath us theke ki taraf chal pada. Jab hum us theke ke paas pahoche to wahaan mujhe mere sabhi dost dikh gaye, mai unke paas chala gaya.
Mai--kahaan hai vo log?
Amir--andar baithe huye hain, kya karna hai?
Mai--andar kaafi bheed hogi, police ka lafda ho sakta hai. 1 kaam karte hain, jis raaste se hum aaye hain wahin par unka wait karte hain. Vo sunsaan rasta hai aur saale usi taraf se jaayenge, wahin par gher lenge unko.
Bhaanu--idea to theek hai, par vo 6 hain aur hum 5.
Mai--maa ki choot unki, sab 1 kaam karo. Us din jis-2 ko tumne pela tha, aaj bhi usi se ladna. Varun ye hockey stick mujhe de, mai Kuldeep ke saath-2 ek aur launde se lad lunga.
Amir--aur mai, us din mere waale ne to mujhe lagbhag pel diya tha.
Mai--abbe fattu, vo sab piye huye honge. Ghanta humse nahi lad paayenge. Chalo wahin chalte hain jahaan unko gherna hai, aaj maar-2 ke bhoot bana dunga behan ke laudo ka
Uske baad hum log us raaste par aa gaye jahaan par humne unhe gherne ka plan banaaya tha, wahaan par khade hokar mai sutta sulgaane laga. Thodi der baad vo log hume bike par aate dikhe to humne beech road par apni scooty laga di. Vo log ruk gaye aur hume dekhne lage, jaise hi Kuldeep ki nazar mujh pe padi to uski gaand fattne ko ho gayi.
Mai--aur beta, aaj kis khushi me chadha li maadarchod.
Kuldeep--tu yahaan kya kar raha hai?
Mai--tere saath ludo khelne aaya hoon, abbe chutiye. Thoda to apna dimaag lada, maarne hi aaya honga.
Kuldeep--tu ye galat kar raha hai.
Mai--maa ki choot teri, maaro sabko.....
Uske baad hum sab log unki taraf daude, unhone apni bike chaalu karke bhaagne ki koshish ki lekin humne unhe pakad liya aur unhe zameen par gira diya. Uske baad to wahaan jung ka maahol ban gaya, hum sabhi log unke nashe me hone ka faayeda utha rahe the aur unhe kutton ki tarah maar rahe the. Mai to akela Kuldeep aur us launde se lad raha tha jisse meri pichli baar ladaai hui thi. Kuldeep mujhe maarne ke liye meri taraf aaya to maine uske pet me laat de maari, tab tak us launde ne peeche se aage mujhe pakadne ki koshish ki to maine uski taang par hockey stick de maari. Vo dard ke maare zameen par baith gaya to maine uske mooh par laat de maari, uske baad maine uski taango par hockey stick se maarna shuru kar diya. Vo dard se karaahta raha par maine uspe koi reham na dikhaaya, itne me meri nazar padi Kuldeep pe jo khada ho gaya tha to mai uske paas gaya aur uski peeth par hockey stick de maari. Vo apne haath apni peeth par le gaya sehlaane ke liye to maine uski hatheli par 1 aur hockey stick de maari, uske baad to maine uske shareer par hockey stick maar-2 ke uska bhoot bana diya. Mai fir badal-2 ke un dono ko pelne laga, kabhi mai Kuldeep ko maarta to kabhi mai us dusre launde ko maarta. Mere doston ne bhi baaki sab ki achi khaasi thukaai kar di thi, jab vo sab zameen par gir gaye to humne 1 naya kaaryakaram shuru kiya. Hum paancho baari-2 se 1-1 karke un logo ko mil kar peetne lage, koi bhaagne ki koshish karta to usko pakad ke zameen par giraate aur fir use pelne lagte. Un logo ki zabardast thukaai ke baad jab hum thak gaye to hum thodi der ruk gaye.
Mai--arre maadarchod, saans fool gayi meri to. Bhaanu bro, 1 sutta de zara.
Bhaanu ne 1 sutta jalaaya aur fir mujhe de diya, mai sutta pite huye Kuldeep ki taraf badhne laga. Mai uske paas jaake baith gaya, uski poori body maar padne ki wajah se sooj gayi thi.
Mai--kyon bhai, aaj pata chala na ki kaisa lagta hai jab akele ko 5-6 log mil ke maarte hain. Samajh aaya ya mai dobaara samjhaaun.
Kuldeep--mai samajh gaya bhai, mujhe maaf kar de. Agli baar se mai kabhi tujhse panga nahi lunga. Mujhe jaane de aaj.
Mai--aise kaise behanchod, suno bhai log. Round 2 start karte hain.
Uske baad hum logo ne fir se un logo ko pelna shuru kar diya, is baar to maine aur tabiyat se un logo ko pela. Jab mann bhar gaya to hum un logo ko aise hi zameen par pada hua chhodkar jaane lage, kuch door chalne ke baad mujhe kuch yaad aaya to mai waapis Kuldeep ki taraf badh gaya. Mai uske paas pahocha to maine dekha ki vo mere jaane ke baad bada khush ho raha tha ki bach gaya lekin jaise hi uski nazar mujh pe padi to uske chehre par fir se khauf aa gaya.
Kuldeep--ab kya ho gaya, itna to maar liya. Ab kya chahta hai tu?
Mai--hisaab baraabar karna chahta hoon. Khada karo be ise.
Mere dosto ne use pakad ke khada kiya aur mai uske peeche aa gaya, maine apna poora zor lagaake uske ghutne me laat de maari to uski dard ke maare 1 cheekh chhoot gayi. Vo neeche baithne laga par maine apne dosto se use dobaara khada karne ko kaha, jaise hi vo khada hua to maine 1 aur laat uske ghutne me de maari. Is baar uske ghutne se kadak ki aawaz aayi, vo zameen par baithne laga to mere dosto ne use chhod diya. Vo zameen par let gaya aur dard ke maare karhaane laga, mai uske paas baitha aur uske kaan me bol pada.
Mai--ab hisaab baraabar hua bro, agli baar sach me mat dikhna varna isse bhi bura haal karunga tera. Samajh gaya na?
Kuldeep--tune ye theek nahi kiya, ab tu nahi bachega. Mai kal subah police me teri complaint kar dunga, fir police dhang se tel lagaake teri gaand maaregi.
Kuldeep ki baat sunke mujhe hasi aa gayi aur mai zor-2 se hasne laga, vo mujhe hairaan hoke dekhe jaa raha tha, use to lag raha tha ki mai paagal ho gaya hoon.
Mai--hahaha......sorry haan bro. Vo kya hai na ki teri baat itni funny thi ki mai apni hasi rok nahi paaya. Vaise bro, tu kal meri complaint karega to mujhe zyaada se zyaada 6 mahine ya 1 saal ki saza hogi par agar Aanchal ne teri complaint kar di ki tune school me use assault karne ki koshish ki thi to tera kya hoga. Assault and attempt to rape ka case banega, kam se kam 7 saal ki saza hogi tujhe. Jab baahar aayega to sab tujhe rapist keh ke bulaayenge, arre vo to bahot baad ki baat hai. Kya keh raha tha tu ki police tel lagaake meri gaand maaregi, arre jab tu tihaar jaayega na to wahaan baaki kaidi bina tel lagaaye teri gaand maarenge, arre re mujhe to soch ke bhi darr lag raha hai. Bol, jaayega jail?
Kuldeep--nahi, mai jail nahi jaaunga. Mai nahi jaaunga jail.
Mai--to bhosdike apna mooh band rakhna, agar aaj ki baat kisi ko pata chali to yaad rakhna ki tera kya haal kar sakta hoon mai. 1 baat aur, don't ever try to play these mind games with me. Mai Samar hoon, koi raah chalta chindi nahi jo teri in ghatiya baaton me fas jaayega. Samjha?
Usne haa me sar hilaaya to mai khada hua aur uski gaand par 1 laat de maari, vo dard se chilla pada to mujhe bada sukoon mila. Uske baad hum paancho wahaan se nikal gaye apne-2 ghar ki taraf, wahaan se nikalne se pehle maine ambulance ko call karke unki location bata di taaki kahin bhosdiwaale marr na jaaye. Ghar jaane se pehle mai Varun ke saath uske ghar chala gaya aur usse 2-3 copies leke apne ghar waapis aa gaya.
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Bhai es tarah update k climax na kro bada dard hota h... aise lajabab hai Aapki story.
Ekdam fadhuu
Jabardast update.
Update Posted Guys
Please read and give your precious reviews
ABHISHEK TRIPATHI
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Fantastic update..dhang s badla lia..
Rocky2602
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Hunterrrr69
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Mst update Bhai
Bilal jan
My Attitude your problem 🖕 Your attitude my foot
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