Update 45 State Of Mind Of Abhi & The Diaries
March ka mahina ab jaa chuka tha.
Abhi ke seene ab bhi dard baaki tha. Usske khayaalon mein ab bhi Ruhi bassi hui thi. Ab bhi wo uss aangan mein guzaare hue ek ek pal ko yaad karta tha.
Aaj, Abhi unn palon ko yaad kar raha tha jiss din ko Ruhi ne ussko lunch ke liye invite kiya tha jab usski maa usske nani ke ghar gayi thi. Abhi yaad kar raha tha kiss tarah Ruhi ke baalon se paani ke katre tapak rahe the, kiss tarah Abhi ne usske gardan ke piche apne naak laga kar ussko sungha tha aur Abhi ab bhi wo khusbhoo mehsoos kar sakta tha. Abhi yaad kar raha tha ke uss din ussne Ruhi ke kiss kiss ang ko chuua aur chuma tha, kahan kahan usska jism Ruhi ke jism se satta tha, raghda tha…. Ruhi ki baahein kiss tarah se Abhi ke kaandhe se hokar usske peeth par hua tha aur kiss taaqat se Ruhi ne Abhi ko jakra tha uss pal ko…. Abhi ko Ruhi ki jism ki khusbhoo bahot passand tha, wo usski khushbhoo ab bhi mehsoos karta tha, wo kissi aur mein nahin ho sakta, wo sirf Ruhi mein hi paaye jaa sakta tha…..
Abhi ne diary mein likha;
“She is still fresh in my mind despite almost 3 months have elapsed. She is still present in my heart and head. I can’t forget her, every day, every moment, every second she is here, around me. She is residing in my heart. She has made a home, a room for her deep inside my heart. I can still smell her fragrance.”
Abhi ne socha ke ab tak usski mangni ho chuki hoti aur aaj wo cigarette nahin pee raha hota. Magar iss waqt sab ulta tha, pehle 10 se 15 cigarettes peeta tha aur ab 30 se 40 peeta hai jabse Ruhi se juda hua hai. Yeh tha natija pyar ka Abhi ne khud se kaha.
Unn dinon VHS tape par video dekhe jaate the. Aur har nayi film jo release hota tha usska ek copy pehle market mein mil jata tha. To uss roz Abhi ne video club se ek nai movie rent kiya aur ghar mein sabke saath milkar dekha movie ko magar film ke dauraan bahut roya kyunke uss mein hero heroine juda ho gaye the aur gaane bhi aise the judaayi ke, ke Abhi se saha nah gaya.
Abhi khud se naraaz hote hue kehta,
“sala kyun main mili uss se? kyun main ne ussko dekha pehli baar? Kyun main ne ek taraf nahin dekha? Kyun Mehboob ne uss bus ko uthaya tha jangal se? kyun saeed mujhse milne aya tha uss kaam ke liye? Kyun main wahan gaya? Mujhe jana hi nahin chahiye tha, nah Ruhi ko dekhta, nah yeh sab hota, aaj main araam se, ghumta firta…. Ab dekho haal aisa ho gaya hai ke ghar ke nah ghat ke… itna dukh, itna gham, jiya nahin jata… paagal ho jaunga main!! Kaise ussko apne zehen se nikalun? Kaise usske chehre ko bhulaun? Kaise unn dhai mahinon ko apne memory se delete karun?! Nah Mehboob ne bus laya hota, nah main wahan kaam karne jata, nah mujhe Ruhi se pyar hota, aur nah aaj main iss haal mein hota!! KYUN? KYUN RUHI MERI ZINDAGI MEIN AAYI? KYUN MERI LIFE KO BARBAAD KARNE AAYI MERI LIFE MEIN WO??!”
Abhi ko bilkool chain aur sukoon nahin tha. Soch raha tha ke 3 mahine beet chuke hein aur abhi tak usska wohi haal hai to ussko khud dar lagne laga tha ke kahin depression mein nah chala jaaye…
Abhi ne dusre ladkiyon ke taraf dekhna hi band kar diya tha ab. Jiss din se Ruhi ke aangan se nikla kissi dusre ladki ke taraf dekhta hi nahin tha…. wo sochta ke ab sare ladkiyan Ruhi jaisi hi hogi…. Khud mein himmat nahin, aur pyar karne chali…. Sab dhoke dene wale honge Abhi sochta… to wo dobara aise gham nahin jhelna chahta…. To door rehta…. Ek nafrat si ho gayi thi jawaan ladkiyon se ussko… wo sochne laga tha ke sab wohi karenge jo Ruhi ne kiya usske saath…. Magar kab tak? Kehte hein nah doobte ko tinke ka sahare ki zaroorat bhi padta hai…. To kia pata wo tinka ajaaye Abhi ki zindagi mein achaanak?
Abhi aksar yeh bhi sochta rehta ke Ruhi agar ek virgin nahin hai to Ruhi ko Abhi ke taraf aur bhi ziada jhukna chahiye tha, kyunke Abhi ussko phir bhi accept kar raha tha aur phir bhi ussko pyar karta tha. Ruhi ko Abhi ki ziada zaroorat hona chahiye tha, magar sab ulta kyun hua tha?
Abhi kabhi kabhi gehraayi se sochta ke kia hua hoga Ruhi ke saath? Kiss ke saath sex kiya hoga jo virgin nahin thi? Kyun Ruhi ne pehle pucha tha ke usski ghalatiyon ko Abhi maaf kar sakta hai? Kia kissi se pyar karti hogi aur uss shakhs ne Ruhi ko behla phussla kar sex kiya aur chorr gaya ussko kissi aur ke liye? Kia kissi shadi shuda aadmi se sex kiya hoga? Kia kissi ne usska rape kiya hoga? Abhi yeh sab sochte hue yeh bhi sochne laga ke kia koyi incestuous relation raha hoga? Kiss ke saath Manoj ke saath? Nahin aisa nahin ho sakta….wo Abhi ko dikh jata agar weisa hota hota to…. Yeh sab soch soch kar Abhi apna sar khapa raha tha…..
Iss gaane ko suna Abhi ne aur kaha ke yeh Ruhi ko Abhi se kehna chahiye tha;
“Aap ki nazron be samjha pyar ki kaabil mujhe
Dil ki aye dhadkan sambhal ja mil gayi manzil mujhe…
Ji hamein Manzoor hai aap ka yeh faisla
Keh rahi hai har nazar banda parvar shukriya
Hanss ke apni zindagi mein kar liya shaamil mujhe
Aap ki nazron ne samjha pyar ki kaabil mujhe….”
Ruhi ko Abhi ka shukra guzaar hona chahiye the ke Abhi ne uss se pyar kiya, usski khaamiyan ke bawajud uss se pyar kiya. Magar Ruhi ne ussko thukraya tha….. aisa kyun hua? Abhi yeh sab sochta tanhaayi mein, jab bhi akela hota to buss yehi sab sochta rehta… khud se kehta ke agar Ruhi aur wo ek nahin ho sake to iss mein loss Ruhi ki hui thi Abhi ki nahin, iss mein khone wali Ruhi thi Abhi nahin…..
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Jab Saeed ne Abhi se kaha ke Mehboob naraz tha kyunke ussne kuch chorra tha usske wife ke paas to Abhi ne ziada jaanne ki koshish ki, magar Saeed ne kaha ke Mehboob khud Abhi se milne aega iss silsile mein kissi din, kyunke mehbob ko pata tha ke iss waqt weh log kahan kaam kar rahe hein….weise har bus owner ek dusre ko jaante pehchaante the uss ilaake mein.
Aur jab Sunil aya wahan kaam karne to Abhi ne uss baare mein baat kiya Sunil se. Ab sunil kyunke wahin ka rehne wala tha aur uss aangan mein sab ussko jaante the to wo kabhi bhi wahan jaata tha aur kissi ko koyi eitraz nahin tha iss liye Sunil ko Abhi ne bheja Rahima se milkar iss baare mein puchne ke liye ke kia Ruhi ne diaries padhi ya nahin.
Teen din baad Sunil ne Abhi ko yeh bataya:
Sunil: “Abhi main wahan jaa raha tha magar Reza ne mujhe jaane se mana kiya kyunke wahan par jiss din tumne diary chorra tha uss din Manoj ghar par tha aur ussne dekha tha tujhe ghar ke andar se….. ussi din shaam ko Mehboob ko sab pata chal gaya tha aur tumhare diaries sab ab bhi Mehboob ke ghar par hai. Wo Ruhi ko mile hi nahin!!”
Abhi ko zabardast jhatla laga yeh sun kar… phir bhi ussne Sunil se kaha,
“Are bhai tumne uss Reza ki baat par yakeen kiya? Kyun? Tujhe khud jaakar Rahima se sach ka pata lagana chahiye tha yaar!! Kia yaar sunil?!”
Sunil: “magar Abhi wahan donon gharon mein bada tension hai iss wajah se… Mehboob ko Ruhi ki maa, Manoj aur Ruhi ke pita bura bhala keh rahe hein kyunke usski wajah se tu Ruhi se mila, aur uski wife tera help kar rahi hai Ruhi ko tere diaries dene ke liye to bada problem hua tha uss aangan mein iss baat ko lekar, to main ne socha ke ab agar main bhi gaya wahan to kahin weh log ab mujh par bhi kahin ungli nah uthaane lage yaar!!”
Abhi kuch der khamosh raha aur sunil ne ek baat bataayi Abhi ko.
Sunil: “kia tujhe pata hai ke Mehboob ki wife ussko chorr kar kissi aur ke saath bhag gayi thi jab Farzina 2 saal ki thi?!”
Abhi ko shock laga aur kaha ke ussko bilkool kuch bhi nahin pata tha iss baare mein!
Tab sunil ne ussko bataya ke Rahima kitni hot aur sexy aurat hai, kitni gori aur khub surat hai aur jab usska ghar ban raha tha concrete wala jo abhi hai uss macon ke sath chakar chalne laga tha Rahima ki, jitney dinon tak wo ghar bana tha utne dinon tak Rahima aur Uss macon ke bich sex hota raha aur ghar ban gaya to Rahima bhaag gayi thi usske saath…. Baad mein saare uss aangan ke mard gaye the uss macon ke yahan bahot ladaayi hui thi aur whan se Rahima ko wapas lekar aaya tha Mehboob….. Ab soch tu bhi kuch weisa hi Ruhi se pyar karne laga aur Rahima black listed hai aise case mein aur ab wo tera help kar rahi hai to issue to hoga hi nah? Ruhi ki maa Rahima ko gali de rahi thi ke kia ussne Ruhi ko apni jaisi samajh rakha hai ke kissi ghair mard ke saath usski beti ko bhagaane ki koshish mein hai!!”
Abhi ko jhatka pe jhatka lag raha tha…… ab Abhi ne yaad kiya ke jab ek din wo Rahima se baat kar raha tha subha ko jab Rahima nighty mein thi aur sleeveless usski baazu dikhe the Ruhi ko usski kitchen se to kiss tarah se Ruhi Abhi se ruth gayi thi, aur Abhi samjha tha ke Ruhi jalan ki vajah se uss se ruthi thi… aur Abhi ko yaad aya ke uss roz khidki ke paas Ruhi ne Abhi se kaha tha ke wo uss Rahima se door rahe, wo achi aurat nahin hai….. to ab Abhi sab samajh raha tha ke kyun Ruhi ne uss se weisa kaha tha uss din!!
Sunil khamosh ho gaya tab Abhi ne phir sunil ko wahan jaakar Rahima se puchne ko kaha, aur sunil ne kaha okay aaj shaam ko hi jaega aur kal Abhi ko pakka khabar dega.
Dusre din jab sunil kaam par mila to Abhi ne pucha kia hua, to sunil hanss raha tha. Ussko hansste dekh kar Abhi ka hausla badha aur jaldi bataane ko kaha tab sunil ne bataya;
“Yaar jiss din tumne diaries diya tha Rahima ko sach mein uss din Manoj ghar par hi tha Rahima ne mujhe bataya…. Kuch ghanton baad, manoj ke ghar se nikal jaane par, Ruhi khud gayi thi Rahima ke ghar uss se milne kyunke Ruhi ne bhi tujhko dekha tha ke tu aya tha wahan, to Ruhi puchne gayi thi ke tu kyun aya tha…. Ruhi ko pakka yakeen tha ke tu ussi ke liye aya hoga. Rahima ne mujhse kaha ke Ruhi tujhse bahot pyar karti hai magar apni maa aur bhai se darrti hai.”
Abhi ne sunil ke baat ko katte hue kaha,
“Mujhe pata hai yaar wo mujhse behad pyar karti hai, magar tu yeh to bata diaries padha Ruhi ne ya nahin?!”.
Sunil: “yaar Rahima ne mujhse kaha ke tujhko sorry kaha hai ussne, ussne apni best kiya aur Ruhi ko tere diaries de diya tha ussne, Ruhi bahot khush hui thi aur hanss rahi thi khushi se ke tumne usske liye kuch bheja hai….… tumne shayad koyi gift bhi dala tha envelope mein Rahima ne kaha ke Ruhi ne uss wrapped gift ko envelope se usske saamne nikala aur apni dress ke jeb mein rakh liya, aur diaries ko envelope sameth apne seene se lagaa kar apne ghar chali gayi Rahima ko thank karte hue aur yeh bhi kehte hue ke kissi ko nahin batane ko ke Abhi ne usske liye kuch diya hai. Magar apne ghar mein jab Abhi tere diary padhne lagi – pata nahin kitna padhi thi ke usski maa ne usske haath se diaries ko chhina aur Manoj ko de diya…. Aur teri diaries ko Manoj ne padha, pura….. tab Mehboob ko wapas karne gaya Rahima ko sunaate hue, tabhi sab mein ladaayi hui ke kyun Rahima intermediate ka kaam kakr rahi hai Ruhi aur tere beech….”
Abhi bilkool chup ho gaya sab sunkar, sar jhuka liya aur usske aankhen bhar aayr to Sunil ne kaha,
“Yaar Rahima ne kaha ke Ruhi tujhse behad pyar karti hai, ussne to mujhse kaha ke tujhe aakar ussko utha lena chahiye usske ghar se, jaise tu taxi mein aya tha, apne doston ko lekar ana, usski ghar mein ghuss ke Ruhi ko utha lejana! Pakka Ruhi jaegi tere saath”
Abhi sochne laga ke Ruhi ki maa kiss kissam ki aurat hai, jab Abhi wahan kaam karta tha tab Ruhi ke sath rehne deti thi aur jo bhi Abhi Ruhi ko deta to lene deti thi aur ab diaries chhin liya Ruhi se, kia diary mein bomb tha jo phat jata? kyun chhina ussne diary ko Ruhi se? kyun nahin padhne diya usse?!
Sunil ne kaha,
“Aur ab diaries Mehboob ke ghar hai aur wo kissi din Saeed ko dega aur saeed tujhko wapas karega…..”
Abhi ne socha ke chalo itna to akkal hai unn logon mein ke diaries ko aag nahin lagaya unn logon ne aur diaries Abhi ko sahi salaamat wapas mil jaega…..
To be continued……. (2332 Words)
Behtareen likha hai aap ne bhai. Abhi k haal, usski haalat aur maansik stithi ko jiss khubhi se aap ne likha hai pehle hisse mein wo lajawaab hai. Bahut passand aya mujhe.
Baaki ke madad jo Sunil ne kiya wah hats off aise dost k liye jo khud ko musibat mein daal kar Rahima se puchne gaya.. Rahima ko wahan problems hue the to ussko aur bhi problem ho sakte the firbhi Sunil gaya aur Abhi ke liye khabar lekar aaya.
Khushi ki baat ye hai ke Ruhi ab bhi Abhi ko chahti hai magar majboor hai aur afsoa ki baat ye hai ke wo puri diary nahin padh saki.
Aur jo Rahima ke past k bare mein Sunil ne bataya, to agar usske saath weise haadsa ho chuke hein to Ruhi ki maa of course nahi chahegi ke Ruhi ussko follow kare.
Anyway aap ne behtareen likha hai bhai.
