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★☆★ XForum | Ultimate Story Contest 2021- Results ★☆★
- Thread starterLucifer
- Start date
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So Guys The time has finally arrived, the moment you all have been waiting for, The results are in but before that let me thank all of the participants in this contest be that writers, readers or chit chatters you guys did an excellent job so thank you so much for taking your time to take part in this wonderful contest you guys are the pillars of this forum.. 
Also thanks to the organizers for organizing such a wonderful contest great job from your side too guys..
Also thanks to the organizers for organizing such a wonderful contest great job from your side too guys..
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Now The Winner Of USC-2021 Is non other then the man the myth the legend himself Yug Purush For his wonderful story "A Loner" a story full of perfection. Who doesn't know SGP he is a legend of his own. Congratulations to him the story was a banger..
Now The Runner up of this beautiful contest is non other then FTK himself HalfbludPrince for his wonderful thriller "अपहरण". He did and wonderful job here and you can tell that just by reading the story it was an amazing experience.. Congrats Franky..
Now time for the second runner up so interestingly we had few stories that fit in this place naturally because we had some amazing stories that were strong contenders for this place but in the end we have a tie here between Ankitarani and TheBlackBlood. Congratulations to both of them. Anita's story was a unique story of its own that both entertained us and gave us a strong message doing so..
And about Shubham's story if I am being honest it was the most emotionally interesting story in this whole contest the message he gave through this story just hits different and his writing skills while doing so was brilliant..
Now The Runner up of this beautiful contest is non other then FTK himself HalfbludPrince for his wonderful thriller "अपहरण". He did and wonderful job here and you can tell that just by reading the story it was an amazing experience.. Congrats Franky..
Now time for the second runner up so interestingly we had few stories that fit in this place naturally because we had some amazing stories that were strong contenders for this place but in the end we have a tie here between Ankitarani and TheBlackBlood. Congratulations to both of them. Anita's story was a unique story of its own that both entertained us and gave us a strong message doing so..
And about Shubham's story if I am being honest it was the most emotionally interesting story in this whole contest the message he gave through this story just hits different and his writing skills while doing so was brilliant..
PRIZE DETAILS
| Position | User | Benifits |
|---|---|---|
Winner |  | |
Runner-Up |  | |
2nd Runner-Up | 1000 Likes + 7 day Sticky thread (Stories) |
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Now time for the best reader award I know we had some issues regarding this Award and I was very disappointed to see people doing somethings just for a award but still its ok it happens because of the competitive state of this forum everyone wants to prove that he/she is better then the others which leads to such situation but we get past those and I'll take care of that in future contests.
So The Winner of this award is none other then DARK WOLFKING himself..His reviews were small but on point writers understood what he was trying to say everytime..
Now we had some good readers those were also not far behind first one is none other than Moon Light herself and second Mahi Maurya they both also did great job hence we decided to reward them with 500 and 350 reaction boost respectively..
So The Winner of this award is none other then DARK WOLFKING himself..His reviews were small but on point writers understood what he was trying to say everytime..
Now we had some good readers those were also not far behind first one is none other than Moon Light herself and second Mahi Maurya they both also did great job hence we decided to reward them with 500 and 350 reaction boost respectively..
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REVIEWS BY JUDGE
PART - I
Points: 6/10
Story : Rashmi ka dard
Written by: love for you
Read the story: here
Review:Overview-: Ek achhi koshish thi... Story likhane ki... Basically sex story sirf enjoyment ke liye behtar hoti hai..lekin pati ke maut ke baad Rashmi ko sasural se milne vali pratadna samaj ki visangati ko darshati hai... Insan ke manobhav ko pakdna bada mushkil hota hai.. Kab knha badal jaye kya pta.. Yahi Haal Rashmi ke pita ke sath hua .. Pros :kahani ka base plot hi insect sex tha... Kafi had tak vo entertainment karti hai..... Sasural me pati ki maut par aane vali kathinayi ko aapne darshane ki koshish ki hai... Jo kahani ko thoda sa sensible bnane ki koshish krti hai.. Cons :- Kahani ka narration behtar ho sakta tha... Seduction hota to kahani aur jyada behtar ho sakti thi ...is tarah ki story se jyada umeed karna beimani thi..i hope aage se aap ek slow paced story likhenge kyunki aap easily isase kaafi achi Kahaani likh shaktey ho.
Points: 6/10
Story : Pornstar se milne ki koshish
Written by: StoryLoverAbdul
Read the story: here
Review: Overview - Imagination ko ek short story me pirona bda mushkil hota hai.. Aapne koshish ki uske liye aapka prayash sarahniya hai..Aapne basically internet ki kaali duniya ko ujaagar karne ki ek koshish ki thi Iss story k through.. Pro - aapne is kahani ke jariye Online data sharing aur anjan logo ke sath apni privacy share krne ke nuksan btane ki koshish ki.. Jo ki ek moral hai story ka.. Good thought or ye sab aapne apne story k flow Mein rehtey hue likha woh ek or positive aspect hai story kaa. Cons - story ka narration plot ke hisab se behtar ho sakta tha...... aage koshish kariye to kafi bdiya likh sakte ho aap... Shabdo ka chayan bhi ek kala hai usko sikhane k liye kuch kahaniyaan padhiye.
Points: 6.5/10
Story : Ek Bahu Ya Ek Avtar
Written by: rockyknows
Read the story: here
Review: Overview :- Ek fantasy story jo apne aap Mein kaafi alag hai.. Kanchan kaa akaaswaani ko sunana or fir ussi hissab se usase baatein karna jabki ashal Mein Woh wahaan thi he nahi..Pura mahool he jadui show kiya aapne Iss story Mein.. Pros:- Narration badhiya tha story kaa jo fantasy stories Mein bahot kam dekhne ko milta hai aapne bade he baareeki se narrate kiya story ko.. Kanchan kaa character magical tha or usko bahot he ummda tareeke se pesh kiya tha aapne.. Cons - Flow weak tha story kaa most importantly grammatical mistake bhi kaafi thi jisase flow or weak hua. Sex scenes average they story k jitana expected tha uss Hadd takk nahi show kar Paae aap jisase story or confusing ho gayi..
Points: 6.5/10
Story : Chunnu mama ki love story
Written by: sandy4441
Read the story: here
Review: Overview - Story ek light comedy thi jo kabhi kabhar hansa deti hai... Chunnu mama ki saral, sahaj aur aakarshit karne vali kahani hai... Jo prem se door rahne ki vifal koshish karta hai ...... Ab chunnu mama ko kaun samjhaye.. Prem to insan ko dekhkar khud ho jata hi.. Karne ki jarurat nahi pdti :love: Pro - Pyar ko pyar hi samjha jaye to behtar hai.. Chutiyapa samjhege to chutiya katega hi... Ek halki comedy ke hisab se story ok thi......do char darishyo par hansi to aayi aur yahi darshata hai ki aapke andar ek achha lekhak chhupa hua hai jise bahar nikaalna bahut jaruri hai :D Cons - Kahani ka plot simple hi tha.. Aur sath me lekhani bhi... Aisi story likhate waqt shabdo aur vyango par bda hi dhyan dena padta hai... Kahani me bewajah ke scene aur dialouge they jo thoda ubau lagte hai... Is par thoda dhyan dene ki jarurat hai All the best for future
Points: 6.5/10
Story : Pyar ek ehsas
Written by: LEON 32
Read the story: here
Review: Overview - Insan apni hawas aur Mahatvkansha me itna andha ho jata hai ki use sahi aur galat me farak nahi pata chalta hai.... Aapki kahani mein hamare jeewan me maojud har bhav hai... Lekin likhane ki itni jaldbaji samjh nahi aayi :D... Pro -. Aapne Iss topic par kahani likhi.. Vahi bahut bdiya positive point of view hai. Character well written they sab, alag alag characters ko bahot he ache se show kiya aapne caahe Sanju ho yaa fir Swati yaa koi or sabke character k sath justice kiya aapne. Cons - kahani agar man se likhi jaye to behtar hoti hai ... Kahani me emotion puri tarah se gayab hai.. Dalne ki koshish to ki hai par puri tarah asafal huye hai aap usme... Umeed karta hoon aage se jo man me aayega vo nahi likhege...Narration par thoda kaam karna hai aapko toh flow apne aap correct hojaaega. Aur future me aapse ek behtarin story ki umeed rakhta hoon
Points:7.5/10
Story : Locket
Written by: Vampire Queen
Read the story: here
Review: Overview - Ye kahani padkar mujhe kisi ki yaad aa gayi,aise insan ki kahani jo pal pal mar raha hai...use jine ki khwahish ke aage uski gareebi sina tane khadi hai.. Tabhi use milti hai ek aurat jiski wajah se use vo hasil hota hai jo vo pana chahta hai.. Par uske badle jo khota hai.. Vahi to kahani ko damdar bnata hai.. Pro - Narration sachmein behtarin tha waakaai Mein ... Har scene ko itne behtar dhang se describe kiya hai ki lagta hai jaise samne koi film chal rahi ho... Twist aur climax jabrdast they story Mein.. Ek jo environment aapne create kiya story k scenes k according maano koi movie dekh rahe hon woh behtarin tha.. Cons - Climax kuchh adhura sa laga tha.. Ye ek short story thi to Roshani ka ye sab krne ki wajah? vo locket vnha kaise panhucha?Aise bahut se ansuljhe sawal kahani Mein hi simat ke rah gaye hai ... Kahani behtar hone ke bawjood best nahi ban saki..Then itane questions k answers se jo curiosity badhi woh story ending ne khatam kardi maano incomplete story padhi ho.. Ek main cheej jo aapne najarandaaj ki woh tha continuation kuch scenes complete hotey hue bhi incomplete they jiski wajah se woh flow carry on nahi kar paae aap..
Points: 6.5/10
Story : Valentine Surprise
Written by: casualnormieaisha
Read the story: here
Review: Overview-Kaafi alag tarah ki Kahaani hai jiski start plain and simple thi.. Yasmeen and Sonali kaa jikar hua suru Mein jisase unse introduce hue hum bahot he saleeke se and then wahaan se story pace up hui.. Pros :Narration kaafi badhiya tha aapka word to word describe kar rahe they.. Then character development badhiya thi Sonali or Ysmeen ki conversation well written thi jisase dono ki friendship show hoti hai.. Cons:- Flow missing the throughout the story maano ek script padh rahe hon. Sex scene kaafi sahi they but sensuality unmein bhi missing thi jiss wajah se bus woh scripted he lage..Thoda slow likha kijiye aap re read karke jisase aapko aapke thoughts ko catch up karne kaa mouka millega.. You can write much better then this..
Points: 6.5/10
Story : Kaam Danav
Written by: naag.champa
Read the story: here
Review: Overview- Kahani apne adultery zone mein behatar karti hai.... Sex scene achhe they story k andar Describe bhi behtar kiya hai unhe.. Pro - Sapno ki duniya ki kahani... Jo man me aaye karo... Aur dikhao.. Yahi is kahani ka positive point hai .. Narration aur flow dono ka combination behatar tha... Start aapne fantasy based ki thi jisse aage ache se carry kiya aapne. Devnagri bahot he ache se likhi aapne jisase story Mein 4 chaand lag gaye.. Cons - ek adultery zone ki story thi jo Adultery zone Mein he fanskar reh gayi.. Fantasy or sex story Mein match nahi kar paae jiss wajah se scenes Mein Woh energy nahi thi jo aapne start Mein show ki thi jiss wajah se Bichmein plot se bhatak gaye aap..
PART -II
Points: 8.0/10
Story : Nisha
Written by: Royal Lover
Read the story: here
Review: Overview - Aakhirkaar aap Aa he gaye contest Mein waapis ,long story toh puri karni nahi hain sir aapko :D.. Just kidding First of all plot selection was on point ek dum 100/100.Aapka best genre nahi hai ye still aapne ek behtarin Kahaani likhi. Pros:Baat karein narration ki toh woh humessa ki tarah bahot he Behtarin raha aapka harr cheej ko baareeki se describe kiya aapne caahe woh story kaa positive aspect ho yaa negative harr scene k sath justice kiya aapne.. Or sabse important Baat suspense beshak kam ho but suspense ko barkaraar rakha aapne story characters k liye bhi or readers k liye bhi jisase readers bandh gaye story se ek jagah par.. Ab Baat karun flow ki toh aapne flow carry kiya third paragraph se or end takk sath rakha aapne i know starting aap average karte ho kissi bhi story ki then usase aage expectations se bhi Uppar jaate ho.. Well done RL sir a great read in every way.. Cons-Ab aapki story ho or Romance ki Baat naa ho :D ye impossible hai but aapne possible kardiya maybe aap romance se break lena caahtey they yaa kuch or lekin jo bhi tha story Mein romance aisa laga maano forcefully daala gaya ho, ike last edit par jiski wajah se story dagmaga gayi or hum jaise typical old RL readers k sath klpd hogaya. Woh puri situation upto expectations nahi thi jo aapse toh nahi umeed thi maybe time kam tha aapke pass but jo bhi tha RL special eliment missing tha jo mujhe pasand nahi aaya as a reader judging aage ki Baat Hai :D...
Points: 7.5/10
Story : Dosti - The Bonding
Written by: Baban
Read the story: here
Review: Overview - Ek or unique story jo Humein sochne par majbur karti hai. Ek or unique plot jisko likhne k liye jyaada mehnat lagti hai.. Start kaafi interesting rahi Kalu kaa yun logon ko jaate hue dekhna then khudse question karna. Bujurg aadmi kaa gyan jo bilkul sateek or sahi tha.. Pros:Iss story se bahot Saare messages send karna caaha aapne society ko jo bahot he ummda Baat Hai. Then ek tricky plot k Uppar ek achi Kahaani likhi aapne.. Ek bejubaan ko jubaan mill gayi ho maano duniya ko dekhne kaa najariya badala hai aapne ek hissab se.. Logon kaa Kalu ko thukraana or fir gyan dena sab realistically show kiya aapne.. Hats off.. Cons:Aapne jaisa maine kaha tricky plot choose kiya jisme aapki narration bahot weak thi jiska main reason tha aapka main character koi shaks nahi tha jiski feelings aap jaantey ho or likh shaktey ho. Kalu k point of view se aapne duniya ko dikhaane ki koshish ki jisme aap asfal hue..
Points:7.5/10
Story : Love with Gangaster
Written by: Qaatil
Read the story: here
Review: Overall - Kisi ke pyar mein ehsas Mein yun jindagi gujaar dena... Iska bhi ek alag nasha hai.. Aapki likhawat ne simple si story ko ek behtar roop de diya.. Jisme emotion bhi hai, aur pyar ko hasil krne ki ajab si dhun . Bahut bdiya Pro - story ke emotion, aur emotion ko mehsus karne ke liye uska narration... Behtreen tha.. Aapne scene by scene sabka detailed version show kiya I mean narrate kiya.. Diksha kaa character or uski innocence mera favorite part raha story kaa jo story ko Orr cute banaata hai.. Cons - Thodi jaldbaaji dikhaai aapne jisme beshak aapne miss kuch bhi nahi kiya ho but jaldbaaji ki wajah se story kaa flow kaafi piche chutt gaya or waapis nahi aaya.. Character buildup badhiya raha bus main characters k liye Baaki side characters kaa aana Jaana kaafi awkward bana diya aapne jiski wajah se dialogues mein awkwardness fail gayi..
Points: 6.5/10
Story : OFFICE KI RANDI BOSS
Written by: EngineerLoda
Read the story: here
Review: Overview - Ek typical boss employee sex story jo apne title k sath justice karti hai.. Pros - Story k start Mein characters kaa separate introduction kaafi sahi or detailed tha jisase Humein characters se rubaru hone kaa mouka milla fir woh caahe Avi ho yaa Parul yaa fir Shama. Narration kaafi sahi tha aapka start Mein jisase characters seedha samjh Mein aagaye.. Cons:Bahot he jaldbaaji machaai aapne story Mein jiski wajah se ye ek typical sex story banke reh gayi. Sex scenes kaafi weak they sensuality missing thi unmein, jiski wajah se ye bus ek sex story banke rehgayi..
Points: 6/10
Story : BAHU KE JALWE
Written by: Mr.raj1100
Read the story: here
Review:Overview :- ek typical Village based story hai same healthy environment k sath. Dev kumar apne bete ki bahu ki pariksha lena chaahta hai. I don't know Aajkal ye kahin hota hai yaa nahi but story Mein aapne show kiya hai isko. Pros:Narration theek tha story kaa or character selection bhi bahot he sahi tha i know character limited they but sabka apna ek role tha story k andar jisko aapne apni writing se bakhubi pura kiya. Cons:Fast forward mode Mein likhi gayi story hai. Bahot jaldbaaji ki aapne story Mein time or space kaafi tha aapke pass but aapne still jaldbaaji Mein ye story suru or khatam bhi kardi jisase story kaa koi impact readers Parr nahi jama..
Points: 7/10
Story : Love At First Sight
Written by: Jamesleon
Read the story: here
Review: Overview :- Overall a good read. But start bahot he speed se hui thi story ki kaafi jaldbaaji ki aapne start Mein like sabkuch aise dikhaya maano woh important he nahi hai like Anisha kon thi kahaan milli thi kaisi dikhti thi , jabki ye sab toh most important rehta hai ek romantic story Mein.. Pros:- Plot behad common tha lekin aapne usko kaafi unique banaya apne dum k Uppar.. Story Mein emotions and Feelings ki bharmaar thi kuch jagah I know thoda jyaada hogaya tha but Romantic stories Mein itana chalta hai. Story Mein family k Uppar bhi kaafi sahi focus kiya hai aapne jo ek romantic story k bich kaafi cute saa lagta hai. Or family kaa importance bhi bahot he sahi show kiya gaya hai story Mein. Ring waala jo scene tha woh mere liye best part tha Iss story kaa.. :adore:. Uske sath sath jo test liya gaya tha hero kaa woh scene bhi kaafi interesting and unique tha good thinking on that part.. Cons:- Story kaa pace again ek cheej thi jo mujhe passand nahi aai I know ki words kam they but itane bhi kam nahi they. I think aap agar thoda or detailing Mein likhtey toh ye ek perfect romantic story hoti. Narration ek or cheej thi Jahaan aapne halki c kami chhodi kuch jagah story weak lagi uski wajah se. Spelling mistakes bhi thode bahot they but Hinglish Mein Woh chalta hai.. Overall A good and healthy romantic story. Best of luck for The contest.. I hope to see more from you in future..
Points: 9.5/10
Story : ~A... Loner
Written by: SGP 2009
Read the story: here
Review: Overview - I know Loner word cool saa lagta hai like "Fuck That I am A Loner" Iss word se "I don't give a fuck" waali vibes milti hain but in reality this word has a deep meaning. And aapne woh he show karne kaa try kiya hai aapke khudke style mein. Ye story review waise toh Judge 1 and 3 ko allot hui thi but unke bich story ko leke thode awkward questions they jiske liye unhone mujhe bhi involve kiya 2 main questions they, 1st).Kya isko short Mein likhna itane behtarin plot k sath justice karta hai???. I am 100% sure aap isko ek 150 updates ki story mein bhi likh shaktey ho easily or woh ek masterpiece hoti. Toh kya isko ek short story Mein likhna sahi tha? Kya reasons rahe honge aapke mujhe laga maybe aap wait nahi kar paae isko likhne k liye yaa time nahi tha ek or long story likhne kaa ya fir aapne kaafi Pehle se he decide karliya tha ki ek contest Mein isko likhna hai. But reasons koi bhi hon Humein ek behtarin story padhne ko milli. Overall plot bahot jyaada interesting and unique tha jo hum keval aapse he expect kar shaktey hain :D. Pros:- Story was fantastic like a typical SGP story. But this time you killed it. Firstly ye theme select karna :adore: then Iss theme k Uppar ek love story likhna :adore: :adore: Then iss love story k andar itane emotions add karna :adore: :adore: :adore:. Story kaa best written part tha Aurora ki death :verysad: I know emotional scene aap bahot kam likhtey ho but still uss part ne dil ko chhu liya.. Narration and flow as usual aapka behtarin hai he. Itani high end story ko bhi aapne apne narration ko help se humari aankhon k Saamne ek movie ki tarah chala diya.. Cons:- Ab jo 2nd question tha Baaki judges kaa woh tha, Kya Ye SGP ka style hai? Answer tha yes and no at the same time I know you love to write Sci fi stories belive me main kaafi pehle se aapki stories padh raha hun. So Sci fi part justified tha. But itane emotions ko show karna uss Sci fi story Mein.. Ye aapka style nahi tha as an old reader of SGP 2009 mujhe ye Baat digest karne mein time laga ki Iss Sci fi story Mein itana sab daala hai aapne. Honestly i am 100% sure aapke pass Issi story par ek aisa plot bhi raha hoga jisme ye love story yaa relationship included nahi rahe honge afterall you are SGP :D.. I know Iss theme par ek love story likhna kaafi challenging task raha hoga but kuch parts Mein ye lagta hai ki kaash ye angle nahi hota story Mein toh atleast humaara thoda or dimag kharaab hota Baaki typical SGP stories ki tarah.. Isme mujhe ye angle thoda common sa laga jo kuch spots par itane high end plot ko feeka kar deta hai. Overall :- An SGP Masterclass.. Always a pleasure to read your stories SGP bhai..
Points: 6.5/10
Story : Bus
Written by: nilu12
Read the story: here
Review: Overview :- Ek typical Sex story jo kaafi sahi thi apne plot k liye.. Ye plot kaafi common rehta hai adultery Mein aisi kaafi stories mill jaaegi but isko as a short story likhna kaafi achi baat hai.. Pros:- Story start se he on point thi like suruwaat se he samjh aagaya tha ki kya hone waala hai. Iss choti c story Mein aap kahin bhi plot se nahi uttare jo ek achi baat hai. Flow bhi story Mein end takk bana raha. Cons:-Story bahot choti thi i think aapko thodi or details add karni caahiye thi jo aap easily add kar bhi shaktey they. Then story kaa narration weak tha words par pakkad kamjor thi aapki. And lastly I know ki pics add karne se story Mein sensuality badhti hai but according to me ek writer ko likhna he aise caahiye ki readers images k bina he ussko imagine kar shakein.
Points:6/10
Story : Shaap ne karwaya milan
Written by: Rgroy97
Read the story: here
Review:Overview -:Ek typical incest sex story with a twist. Iss shraap k Uppar based aap kaafi alag kahaaniyaan bhi likh shaktey they but aapne ye select kiya toh bhi sahi hai.. Pros:-Story Mein main part shraap se he related raha. Sex scenes bhi average they. Flow story kaa theek tha or ek typical incest story Mein Shraap kaa twist kaafi sahi laga.. Cons:- Story behad common thi agar shraap k part ko hata dein toh sab padha padha saa lag raha tha. Narration kaafi weak tha or spelling mistakes bhi kaafi thi. Overall ek average story with a good twist.. Best of luck for the contest. I hope aage se aap or behtar likhenge..
PART - I
Review:Overview-: Ek achhi koshish thi... Story likhane ki... Basically sex story sirf enjoyment ke liye behtar hoti hai..lekin pati ke maut ke baad Rashmi ko sasural se milne vali pratadna samaj ki visangati ko darshati hai... Insan ke manobhav ko pakdna bada mushkil hota hai.. Kab knha badal jaye kya pta.. Yahi Haal Rashmi ke pita ke sath hua .. Pros :kahani ka base plot hi insect sex tha... Kafi had tak vo entertainment karti hai..... Sasural me pati ki maut par aane vali kathinayi ko aapne darshane ki koshish ki hai... Jo kahani ko thoda sa sensible bnane ki koshish krti hai.. Cons :- Kahani ka narration behtar ho sakta tha... Seduction hota to kahani aur jyada behtar ho sakti thi ...is tarah ki story se jyada umeed karna beimani thi..i hope aage se aap ek slow paced story likhenge kyunki aap easily isase kaafi achi Kahaani likh shaktey ho.
Review: Overview - Imagination ko ek short story me pirona bda mushkil hota hai.. Aapne koshish ki uske liye aapka prayash sarahniya hai..Aapne basically internet ki kaali duniya ko ujaagar karne ki ek koshish ki thi Iss story k through.. Pro - aapne is kahani ke jariye Online data sharing aur anjan logo ke sath apni privacy share krne ke nuksan btane ki koshish ki.. Jo ki ek moral hai story ka.. Good thought or ye sab aapne apne story k flow Mein rehtey hue likha woh ek or positive aspect hai story kaa. Cons - story ka narration plot ke hisab se behtar ho sakta tha...... aage koshish kariye to kafi bdiya likh sakte ho aap... Shabdo ka chayan bhi ek kala hai usko sikhane k liye kuch kahaniyaan padhiye.
Review: Overview :- Ek fantasy story jo apne aap Mein kaafi alag hai.. Kanchan kaa akaaswaani ko sunana or fir ussi hissab se usase baatein karna jabki ashal Mein Woh wahaan thi he nahi..Pura mahool he jadui show kiya aapne Iss story Mein.. Pros:- Narration badhiya tha story kaa jo fantasy stories Mein bahot kam dekhne ko milta hai aapne bade he baareeki se narrate kiya story ko.. Kanchan kaa character magical tha or usko bahot he ummda tareeke se pesh kiya tha aapne.. Cons - Flow weak tha story kaa most importantly grammatical mistake bhi kaafi thi jisase flow or weak hua. Sex scenes average they story k jitana expected tha uss Hadd takk nahi show kar Paae aap jisase story or confusing ho gayi..
Review: Overview - Story ek light comedy thi jo kabhi kabhar hansa deti hai... Chunnu mama ki saral, sahaj aur aakarshit karne vali kahani hai... Jo prem se door rahne ki vifal koshish karta hai ...... Ab chunnu mama ko kaun samjhaye.. Prem to insan ko dekhkar khud ho jata hi.. Karne ki jarurat nahi pdti :love: Pro - Pyar ko pyar hi samjha jaye to behtar hai.. Chutiyapa samjhege to chutiya katega hi... Ek halki comedy ke hisab se story ok thi......do char darishyo par hansi to aayi aur yahi darshata hai ki aapke andar ek achha lekhak chhupa hua hai jise bahar nikaalna bahut jaruri hai :D Cons - Kahani ka plot simple hi tha.. Aur sath me lekhani bhi... Aisi story likhate waqt shabdo aur vyango par bda hi dhyan dena padta hai... Kahani me bewajah ke scene aur dialouge they jo thoda ubau lagte hai... Is par thoda dhyan dene ki jarurat hai All the best for future
Points: 6.5/10
Story : Alfaz ka safar
Written by: xxxsimplewriter2xxx
Read the story: here
Review: Overview - Kahani ki shuruwat bahut slow tarike se hoti hai... Kahani ke buildup ne pace bahut slow rakha hai...Baki maa ka prem adbhut hota hai.. Uska ehsas vo prem khone ke baad hota hai... Nice effort :claps: Pro - kahani ka plot iska positive point tha.. Iska mool uddesya ... Langauge saral aur sahaj thi..Aap jo kehna caah rahe they Kahaani k through woh bakhubi readers takk loud and clearly pohancha.. Flow bhi bade he ache se maintain kiya aapne story k andar.. Cons - kisi bhi kahani ko kahne ke liye uske dialouge ya sentence bahut mahatvapurn hote hai... Un par kam karne ki jarurat hai aapko .. Ek achha plot hone ke bawjood.. Dil se connect nahi ho pati hai ye story ...Narration weak tha aapka jisase itani deep story average story banke reh gayi.. I hope in future aap ispar kaam karenge..
Review: Overview - Kahani ki shuruwat bahut slow tarike se hoti hai... Kahani ke buildup ne pace bahut slow rakha hai...Baki maa ka prem adbhut hota hai.. Uska ehsas vo prem khone ke baad hota hai... Nice effort :claps: Pro - kahani ka plot iska positive point tha.. Iska mool uddesya ... Langauge saral aur sahaj thi..Aap jo kehna caah rahe they Kahaani k through woh bakhubi readers takk loud and clearly pohancha.. Flow bhi bade he ache se maintain kiya aapne story k andar.. Cons - kisi bhi kahani ko kahne ke liye uske dialouge ya sentence bahut mahatvapurn hote hai... Un par kam karne ki jarurat hai aapko .. Ek achha plot hone ke bawjood.. Dil se connect nahi ho pati hai ye story ...Narration weak tha aapka jisase itani deep story average story banke reh gayi.. I hope in future aap ispar kaam karenge..
Review: Overview - Insan apni hawas aur Mahatvkansha me itna andha ho jata hai ki use sahi aur galat me farak nahi pata chalta hai.... Aapki kahani mein hamare jeewan me maojud har bhav hai... Lekin likhane ki itni jaldbaji samjh nahi aayi :D... Pro -. Aapne Iss topic par kahani likhi.. Vahi bahut bdiya positive point of view hai. Character well written they sab, alag alag characters ko bahot he ache se show kiya aapne caahe Sanju ho yaa fir Swati yaa koi or sabke character k sath justice kiya aapne. Cons - kahani agar man se likhi jaye to behtar hoti hai ... Kahani me emotion puri tarah se gayab hai.. Dalne ki koshish to ki hai par puri tarah asafal huye hai aap usme... Umeed karta hoon aage se jo man me aayega vo nahi likhege...Narration par thoda kaam karna hai aapko toh flow apne aap correct hojaaega. Aur future me aapse ek behtarin story ki umeed rakhta hoon
Review: Overview - Ye kahani padkar mujhe kisi ki yaad aa gayi,aise insan ki kahani jo pal pal mar raha hai...use jine ki khwahish ke aage uski gareebi sina tane khadi hai.. Tabhi use milti hai ek aurat jiski wajah se use vo hasil hota hai jo vo pana chahta hai.. Par uske badle jo khota hai.. Vahi to kahani ko damdar bnata hai.. Pro - Narration sachmein behtarin tha waakaai Mein ... Har scene ko itne behtar dhang se describe kiya hai ki lagta hai jaise samne koi film chal rahi ho... Twist aur climax jabrdast they story Mein.. Ek jo environment aapne create kiya story k scenes k according maano koi movie dekh rahe hon woh behtarin tha.. Cons - Climax kuchh adhura sa laga tha.. Ye ek short story thi to Roshani ka ye sab krne ki wajah? vo locket vnha kaise panhucha?Aise bahut se ansuljhe sawal kahani Mein hi simat ke rah gaye hai ... Kahani behtar hone ke bawjood best nahi ban saki..Then itane questions k answers se jo curiosity badhi woh story ending ne khatam kardi maano incomplete story padhi ho.. Ek main cheej jo aapne najarandaaj ki woh tha continuation kuch scenes complete hotey hue bhi incomplete they jiski wajah se woh flow carry on nahi kar paae aap..
Review: Overview-Kaafi alag tarah ki Kahaani hai jiski start plain and simple thi.. Yasmeen and Sonali kaa jikar hua suru Mein jisase unse introduce hue hum bahot he saleeke se and then wahaan se story pace up hui.. Pros :Narration kaafi badhiya tha aapka word to word describe kar rahe they.. Then character development badhiya thi Sonali or Ysmeen ki conversation well written thi jisase dono ki friendship show hoti hai.. Cons:- Flow missing the throughout the story maano ek script padh rahe hon. Sex scene kaafi sahi they but sensuality unmein bhi missing thi jiss wajah se bus woh scripted he lage..Thoda slow likha kijiye aap re read karke jisase aapko aapke thoughts ko catch up karne kaa mouka millega.. You can write much better then this..
Review: Overview- Kahani apne adultery zone mein behatar karti hai.... Sex scene achhe they story k andar Describe bhi behtar kiya hai unhe.. Pro - Sapno ki duniya ki kahani... Jo man me aaye karo... Aur dikhao.. Yahi is kahani ka positive point hai .. Narration aur flow dono ka combination behatar tha... Start aapne fantasy based ki thi jisse aage ache se carry kiya aapne. Devnagri bahot he ache se likhi aapne jisase story Mein 4 chaand lag gaye.. Cons - ek adultery zone ki story thi jo Adultery zone Mein he fanskar reh gayi.. Fantasy or sex story Mein match nahi kar paae jiss wajah se scenes Mein Woh energy nahi thi jo aapne start Mein show ki thi jiss wajah se Bichmein plot se bhatak gaye aap..
Points:6.5/10
Story : Bhoot
Written by: स्नेहील
Read the story: here
Review: Overview - ek aise bhoot ki kahani hai jiski aakaal maut hoti hai aur uski antim ichha sex thi? :bow: :D ... Khair aapki kahani ke jariye uski antim ichha puri huyi... Use mukti mili. Pro - Aap ek achhe writer hai.. Aapke skills kahani mein nazar aate hai... Narration achha hai...Aapka plot bahot weak tha lekin fir bhi aapne usme se ek achi story likhi jo kaabil"e tareef hai.. Vaishali or Om kaa character aapne ache se build kiya and uske Uppar apni story banaai. Cons -Kahani thoda jaldi khatm hui Jab ek short story contest me adultery post kar rahe hain toh aapko sex ke alawa dikhane ko kuchh rahta nahi hai.... To character buildup, seduction, thoda Lamba chalne vale manohar drishya rakhne chahiye.. Umeed hai aage se aap yaad rakhege All the best for contest
Review: Overview - ek aise bhoot ki kahani hai jiski aakaal maut hoti hai aur uski antim ichha sex thi? :bow: :D ... Khair aapki kahani ke jariye uski antim ichha puri huyi... Use mukti mili. Pro - Aap ek achhe writer hai.. Aapke skills kahani mein nazar aate hai... Narration achha hai...Aapka plot bahot weak tha lekin fir bhi aapne usme se ek achi story likhi jo kaabil"e tareef hai.. Vaishali or Om kaa character aapne ache se build kiya and uske Uppar apni story banaai. Cons -Kahani thoda jaldi khatm hui Jab ek short story contest me adultery post kar rahe hain toh aapko sex ke alawa dikhane ko kuchh rahta nahi hai.... To character buildup, seduction, thoda Lamba chalne vale manohar drishya rakhne chahiye.. Umeed hai aage se aap yaad rakhege All the best for contest
PART -II
Review: Overview - Aakhirkaar aap Aa he gaye contest Mein waapis ,long story toh puri karni nahi hain sir aapko :D.. Just kidding First of all plot selection was on point ek dum 100/100.Aapka best genre nahi hai ye still aapne ek behtarin Kahaani likhi. Pros:Baat karein narration ki toh woh humessa ki tarah bahot he Behtarin raha aapka harr cheej ko baareeki se describe kiya aapne caahe woh story kaa positive aspect ho yaa negative harr scene k sath justice kiya aapne.. Or sabse important Baat suspense beshak kam ho but suspense ko barkaraar rakha aapne story characters k liye bhi or readers k liye bhi jisase readers bandh gaye story se ek jagah par.. Ab Baat karun flow ki toh aapne flow carry kiya third paragraph se or end takk sath rakha aapne i know starting aap average karte ho kissi bhi story ki then usase aage expectations se bhi Uppar jaate ho.. Well done RL sir a great read in every way.. Cons-Ab aapki story ho or Romance ki Baat naa ho :D ye impossible hai but aapne possible kardiya maybe aap romance se break lena caahtey they yaa kuch or lekin jo bhi tha story Mein romance aisa laga maano forcefully daala gaya ho, ike last edit par jiski wajah se story dagmaga gayi or hum jaise typical old RL readers k sath klpd hogaya. Woh puri situation upto expectations nahi thi jo aapse toh nahi umeed thi maybe time kam tha aapke pass but jo bhi tha RL special eliment missing tha jo mujhe pasand nahi aaya as a reader judging aage ki Baat Hai :D...
Review: Overview - Ek or unique story jo Humein sochne par majbur karti hai. Ek or unique plot jisko likhne k liye jyaada mehnat lagti hai.. Start kaafi interesting rahi Kalu kaa yun logon ko jaate hue dekhna then khudse question karna. Bujurg aadmi kaa gyan jo bilkul sateek or sahi tha.. Pros:Iss story se bahot Saare messages send karna caaha aapne society ko jo bahot he ummda Baat Hai. Then ek tricky plot k Uppar ek achi Kahaani likhi aapne.. Ek bejubaan ko jubaan mill gayi ho maano duniya ko dekhne kaa najariya badala hai aapne ek hissab se.. Logon kaa Kalu ko thukraana or fir gyan dena sab realistically show kiya aapne.. Hats off.. Cons:Aapne jaisa maine kaha tricky plot choose kiya jisme aapki narration bahot weak thi jiska main reason tha aapka main character koi shaks nahi tha jiski feelings aap jaantey ho or likh shaktey ho. Kalu k point of view se aapne duniya ko dikhaane ki koshish ki jisme aap asfal hue..
Review: Overall - Kisi ke pyar mein ehsas Mein yun jindagi gujaar dena... Iska bhi ek alag nasha hai.. Aapki likhawat ne simple si story ko ek behtar roop de diya.. Jisme emotion bhi hai, aur pyar ko hasil krne ki ajab si dhun . Bahut bdiya Pro - story ke emotion, aur emotion ko mehsus karne ke liye uska narration... Behtreen tha.. Aapne scene by scene sabka detailed version show kiya I mean narrate kiya.. Diksha kaa character or uski innocence mera favorite part raha story kaa jo story ko Orr cute banaata hai.. Cons - Thodi jaldbaaji dikhaai aapne jisme beshak aapne miss kuch bhi nahi kiya ho but jaldbaaji ki wajah se story kaa flow kaafi piche chutt gaya or waapis nahi aaya.. Character buildup badhiya raha bus main characters k liye Baaki side characters kaa aana Jaana kaafi awkward bana diya aapne jiski wajah se dialogues mein awkwardness fail gayi..
Review: Overview - Ek typical boss employee sex story jo apne title k sath justice karti hai.. Pros - Story k start Mein characters kaa separate introduction kaafi sahi or detailed tha jisase Humein characters se rubaru hone kaa mouka milla fir woh caahe Avi ho yaa Parul yaa fir Shama. Narration kaafi sahi tha aapka start Mein jisase characters seedha samjh Mein aagaye.. Cons:Bahot he jaldbaaji machaai aapne story Mein jiski wajah se ye ek typical sex story banke reh gayi. Sex scenes kaafi weak they sensuality missing thi unmein, jiski wajah se ye bus ek sex story banke rehgayi..
Review:Overview :- ek typical Village based story hai same healthy environment k sath. Dev kumar apne bete ki bahu ki pariksha lena chaahta hai. I don't know Aajkal ye kahin hota hai yaa nahi but story Mein aapne show kiya hai isko. Pros:Narration theek tha story kaa or character selection bhi bahot he sahi tha i know character limited they but sabka apna ek role tha story k andar jisko aapne apni writing se bakhubi pura kiya. Cons:Fast forward mode Mein likhi gayi story hai. Bahot jaldbaaji ki aapne story Mein time or space kaafi tha aapke pass but aapne still jaldbaaji Mein ye story suru or khatam bhi kardi jisase story kaa koi impact readers Parr nahi jama..
Review: Overview :- Overall a good read. But start bahot he speed se hui thi story ki kaafi jaldbaaji ki aapne start Mein like sabkuch aise dikhaya maano woh important he nahi hai like Anisha kon thi kahaan milli thi kaisi dikhti thi , jabki ye sab toh most important rehta hai ek romantic story Mein.. Pros:- Plot behad common tha lekin aapne usko kaafi unique banaya apne dum k Uppar.. Story Mein emotions and Feelings ki bharmaar thi kuch jagah I know thoda jyaada hogaya tha but Romantic stories Mein itana chalta hai. Story Mein family k Uppar bhi kaafi sahi focus kiya hai aapne jo ek romantic story k bich kaafi cute saa lagta hai. Or family kaa importance bhi bahot he sahi show kiya gaya hai story Mein. Ring waala jo scene tha woh mere liye best part tha Iss story kaa.. :adore:. Uske sath sath jo test liya gaya tha hero kaa woh scene bhi kaafi interesting and unique tha good thinking on that part.. Cons:- Story kaa pace again ek cheej thi jo mujhe passand nahi aai I know ki words kam they but itane bhi kam nahi they. I think aap agar thoda or detailing Mein likhtey toh ye ek perfect romantic story hoti. Narration ek or cheej thi Jahaan aapne halki c kami chhodi kuch jagah story weak lagi uski wajah se. Spelling mistakes bhi thode bahot they but Hinglish Mein Woh chalta hai.. Overall A good and healthy romantic story. Best of luck for The contest.. I hope to see more from you in future..
Review: Overview - I know Loner word cool saa lagta hai like "Fuck That I am A Loner" Iss word se "I don't give a fuck" waali vibes milti hain but in reality this word has a deep meaning. And aapne woh he show karne kaa try kiya hai aapke khudke style mein. Ye story review waise toh Judge 1 and 3 ko allot hui thi but unke bich story ko leke thode awkward questions they jiske liye unhone mujhe bhi involve kiya 2 main questions they, 1st).Kya isko short Mein likhna itane behtarin plot k sath justice karta hai???. I am 100% sure aap isko ek 150 updates ki story mein bhi likh shaktey ho easily or woh ek masterpiece hoti. Toh kya isko ek short story Mein likhna sahi tha? Kya reasons rahe honge aapke mujhe laga maybe aap wait nahi kar paae isko likhne k liye yaa time nahi tha ek or long story likhne kaa ya fir aapne kaafi Pehle se he decide karliya tha ki ek contest Mein isko likhna hai. But reasons koi bhi hon Humein ek behtarin story padhne ko milli. Overall plot bahot jyaada interesting and unique tha jo hum keval aapse he expect kar shaktey hain :D. Pros:- Story was fantastic like a typical SGP story. But this time you killed it. Firstly ye theme select karna :adore: then Iss theme k Uppar ek love story likhna :adore: :adore: Then iss love story k andar itane emotions add karna :adore: :adore: :adore:. Story kaa best written part tha Aurora ki death :verysad: I know emotional scene aap bahot kam likhtey ho but still uss part ne dil ko chhu liya.. Narration and flow as usual aapka behtarin hai he. Itani high end story ko bhi aapne apne narration ko help se humari aankhon k Saamne ek movie ki tarah chala diya.. Cons:- Ab jo 2nd question tha Baaki judges kaa woh tha, Kya Ye SGP ka style hai? Answer tha yes and no at the same time I know you love to write Sci fi stories belive me main kaafi pehle se aapki stories padh raha hun. So Sci fi part justified tha. But itane emotions ko show karna uss Sci fi story Mein.. Ye aapka style nahi tha as an old reader of SGP 2009 mujhe ye Baat digest karne mein time laga ki Iss Sci fi story Mein itana sab daala hai aapne. Honestly i am 100% sure aapke pass Issi story par ek aisa plot bhi raha hoga jisme ye love story yaa relationship included nahi rahe honge afterall you are SGP :D.. I know Iss theme par ek love story likhna kaafi challenging task raha hoga but kuch parts Mein ye lagta hai ki kaash ye angle nahi hota story Mein toh atleast humaara thoda or dimag kharaab hota Baaki typical SGP stories ki tarah.. Isme mujhe ye angle thoda common sa laga jo kuch spots par itane high end plot ko feeka kar deta hai. Overall :- An SGP Masterclass.. Always a pleasure to read your stories SGP bhai..
Review: Overview :- Ek typical Sex story jo kaafi sahi thi apne plot k liye.. Ye plot kaafi common rehta hai adultery Mein aisi kaafi stories mill jaaegi but isko as a short story likhna kaafi achi baat hai.. Pros:- Story start se he on point thi like suruwaat se he samjh aagaya tha ki kya hone waala hai. Iss choti c story Mein aap kahin bhi plot se nahi uttare jo ek achi baat hai. Flow bhi story Mein end takk bana raha. Cons:-Story bahot choti thi i think aapko thodi or details add karni caahiye thi jo aap easily add kar bhi shaktey they. Then story kaa narration weak tha words par pakkad kamjor thi aapki. And lastly I know ki pics add karne se story Mein sensuality badhti hai but according to me ek writer ko likhna he aise caahiye ki readers images k bina he ussko imagine kar shakein.
Review:Overview -:Ek typical incest sex story with a twist. Iss shraap k Uppar based aap kaafi alag kahaaniyaan bhi likh shaktey they but aapne ye select kiya toh bhi sahi hai.. Pros:-Story Mein main part shraap se he related raha. Sex scenes bhi average they. Flow story kaa theek tha or ek typical incest story Mein Shraap kaa twist kaafi sahi laga.. Cons:- Story behad common thi agar shraap k part ko hata dein toh sab padha padha saa lag raha tha. Narration kaafi weak tha or spelling mistakes bhi kaafi thi. Overall ek average story with a good twist.. Best of luck for the contest. I hope aage se aap or behtar likhenge..
Points: 5.5/10
Story : Bebo ki chudai truck MN
Written by: Wahshi jutt
Read the story: here
Review: Overview - : Ek typical Bollywood actress sex story. Background kaafi acha show kiya hai story Mein.. Pros:- Jyaada kuch nahi tha story Mein bus sex tha jo average raha. Cons- Bahot he weak narration thi story Mein and then bahot he grammatical mistakes thi. Sex scene kaafi weak tha but background sahi tha.. You have talent to write but you should write patiently itana jaldi matt kiya karo thoda slowly likho. Hopefully I'll see a better story from you in next contest because you surely can..
Review: Overview - : Ek typical Bollywood actress sex story. Background kaafi acha show kiya hai story Mein.. Pros:- Jyaada kuch nahi tha story Mein bus sex tha jo average raha. Cons- Bahot he weak narration thi story Mein and then bahot he grammatical mistakes thi. Sex scene kaafi weak tha but background sahi tha.. You have talent to write but you should write patiently itana jaldi matt kiya karo thoda slowly likho. Hopefully I'll see a better story from you in next contest because you surely can..
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PART - III
Points: 8.5/10.
Story : "वापसी की कीमत"
Written by: Shubham Kumar
Read the story: here
Review: Overview - Bahot he ummda story thi too emotional. Samjh nahi aaraha isko real life based bolein yaa movies based because ye sab cheej bahot jagah dekhne ko millti hain. Vijay kaa character bahot he confusing raha i mean not for readers like woh khud confusing tha jisase woh or interesting bana.. Then uske dad kaa character bhi kaafi acha tha story k liye. Pros-Firstly let me talk about the swiftness in the language.. Devnagri ko bahot he ummda tareeke se likha hai aapne hats off to you. Vijay ne ego Mein aake sab kiya and then usse baadmein Jaake realise hua ki woh Kitana galat tha. Or in sabko bahot he ache se show kiya aapne jo regret tha woh saaf dikhaadiya waaah! .. Or jo message aap Iss story k through send karna caahtey they woh loud and clear aapne readers ko diya. Well done.. Cons-Family drama humessa he boring hoti hai but aapne isko ek boring story nahi banane diya but ek point par story boring hojaati hai because of the same thing going on story limited thi like kuch jyaada nahi tha jiski wajah se halki weak rehgayi story. Overall A wonderful experience.. Hats off..
Points: 7/10
Story : CHULBULI CHANDNI
Written by: manikmittalme07
Read the story: here
Review: Overview - Well I guess aap unn chuninda writers Mein se ho jissne story k title k sath justice kiya. Jaisa title waisa he aapne show kiya fir woh caahe characters ki Baat Ho yaa fir plot ki. Pros:- Story ki start hui Rattan se then ussne bataaya uski dosti k baare Mein and then story badalti badalti Chandani se hoti hui Ravi and then ek incest relationship par end hui. Ye aapke multi talent ko show karta hai story ne kaafi turns liye in term of events. Or Iss bich story kaa flow jabardast raha jo maintain karna bahot he achi musqill hota hai. Cons:Story kaa narration bahot he weak tha like Rattan k pov se woh intensity show nahi kar paae aap jiske wajah se story middle Mein aake apne path se move hone lagi jiski wajah se end Mein Jo kuch hua woh jaldbaaji jaisa laga. Sensual scenes ko thoda sa weakly show kiya gaya tha jiski wajah se unmein koi point nahi tha.. Overall a good story with a great plot..
Points: 7.5/10
Story : वह कोण थी
Written by: Hunk09
Read the story: here
Review: Overview - A typical one sided college love story. Deepak Sandhya se pyaar karta tha and as a typical one sided lover woh Sandhya ko kuch Keh nahi paaya.. And then jab ussne himmat karke kehna caaha tab usse pata chala toh sandhya ki Shaadi tay ho chuki hai woh bhi kissi teacher k sath.. Ye concept thoda unique tha story Mein and Yahaan se story completely new hojaati hai.. Pros :- Start se he story ek typical one sided love story ki tarah lagti hai but jaise jaise hum aage progress karte hain toh story kaafi turns leti hai. College reunion part kaafi well described tha. Narration and scene sense kaafi sahi rahi story Mein jiski wajah se story kaa flow barkaraar raha.. Cons:- Iss story k base par aap 3 story likh saktey they teeno kaa plot alag alag rehta (College one sided love, College Réunion and then Horror Story) yaa maybe ye idea tha aapka ki teeno ko milake ek story likhi jaaye but i dont think so issne kaam kiya kyunki story bahot he confusing ban gayi like start Mein typical Bollywood one sided college love story then uski yaadein ye sab expected tha then College reunion or uske Baad kaa scene fir story ko or awkward banata hai aatma lekin kyun?? Tabhi kyun?? Bahot Saare questions un answered rahe story k dauraan..
Points: 6.5/10
Story : वासना एक अतृप्त दानाव
Written by: Shansha
Read the story: here
Review:Overview-Story ki start padhke lagta hai ki ye koi horror story hogi. Kyunki start hoti hai Shah se usko raat ko kuch dikhta hai woh wahaan Jaata Hai darrtey hue then usse wahaan Shivshankar or Shivangi milltey hain jo injured they and wahan se story progress hoti hai. Pros-Story ko bahot he ache se narrate kiya gaya hai or aapki hindi kaafi achi hai kuch jagah mistakes hain but itana hota hai. Then story kaa flow kaafi sahi hai.. Story characters bus limited they but sabka apna alag mehtav show kiya hai usme aapne jo ek achi Baat Hai.. Cons:- I know ye ek short story contest tha but aapne story bahot he short rakhi jiss tarah ki thrilling start aapne di thi story se bahot kuch expected tha readers ko but in the end ye bus ek typical sex story banke reh gayi sex scenes thode weak they story ki sensuality missing thi.. I know you can write a lot better then that so I hope next time aap or better try karenge plot selection k maamle Mein.
Points: 8/10
Story : क़ातिल कौन ?
Written by: SANJU ( Versha Ritu )
Read the story: here
Review: Overview - Ek or story jo apne title se justice karti hai totally. Ek behad ummda koshish thriller story likhne ki. I know short story Mein Ek murder mystery likhna bahot hard hota hai but you did a great job so hats off to you. Pros:- Story Mein bahot Saare characters involved they but mainly story kuch characters par he focused thi character buildup kaafi sahi tha.. Flow bhi bahot sahi raha throughout the whole story jisase story ki layy bani rahi. Or ek most important Baat thi, characters kaa background fir caahe woh ek Journalist ho yaa fir woh inspector Dushyant ho aapne sabko naturally show kiya unki job Mein Jo ek or plus point hai story kaa isase story Mein realistic feelings aati hain. Cons:Story ki start bahot he thrilling thi Neha kaa intro then Baaki sab or uske Baad fir murder. Then ab ek murder mystery kaa sabse hard and important part hota hai ending sab kuch explain karna jo ye nahi hai ki aapne ache se nahi kiya but unfortunately end kaafi awkward laga Ye sab bahot he easily show kardiya aapne like bus hogaya kind of vibes.. Jiski wajah se story kaa flow last mein aake thoda dagmagaaya or end Mein story over dramatic lagi. Overall a good thriller..
Points: 7.5/10
Story : Robo
Written by: Adirshi
Read the story: here
Review: Overview :- This is the most interesting story I've read in this contest I am confused ki Iss story se kya except karun but finally i started reading it i was surprised with the detailed writing, great stuff. Karan was a robot ok then main isme involve hua toh aapne Karan ka love angle add kiya Miksha and uski death jo unnecessary tha mere hissab se. Then main uspar focus karne laga toh aapne Aniket ko add kiya ye character bahot he ummda tareeke se portray kiya aapne i give you that.. Pros:Story kaa narration bahot he neat and clean tha like on point. Then Karan And Aniket k dialogues on point they like lag raha tha ki Robot k words hain woh. Start bahot he precisely ki aapne Woh mahoool woh lover poitn woh view and then intro uske Baad Miksha kaa character jo ek hissab se Karan ki girlfriend he thi but uski death hogayi ussi time. And then Ekdum se Aniket kaa aana and then unki baatein Ruhi kaa involvement Karan kaa anger and uske anger k results uske Baad Ruhi and karan then Ruhi k dialogues uske Baad fir ek passionate kiss.. Isase ye saaf hai ki story Mein bahot kuch hua or aapne harr cheeej baareeki se likhi bhi.. Cons:Ab future stories yaa movies kaa sabse bada negative point ye hai ki unhe padhne waalon ne usase Pehle he future ki ek image apne dimag Mein set kar rakhi hoti hai ki future aisa hoga ye sabne kiya hai obviously toh jab story Mein Woh imagination match nahi hoti toh interest loose hota hai same mere sath hua. I totally think plot misguided tha aap ye complete story human based bhi likh shaktey they 2021 Mein bilkul same but Robots ko add karke Iss story kaa viewpoint he badal gaya and then story incomplete he rahi Vishwanath kaa kya hoga?? Or agar kuch hona he nahi tha toh usko unnecessarily add kyun kiya gaya? Ye ek or question tha mera.. Then Ruhi or Karan k bich itani easily sab hona ye or bhi awkward banata hai story ko. Story bahot detailed thi but still kaafi details missing thi. Overall a confusing yet good read..
Points: 7/10
Story : कोयल
Written by: Mastrani
Read the story: here
Review: Overview - A good Incest story on brother and sister relationship. Koyal or Bablu dono k character ko he baareeki se show kiya aapne jisase story ko ek base milla buildup k liye. Pros- Plot kaafi well developed tha and then limited characters k bich itane Saare dialogues likhna apne aap Mein Ek skill hai jo aapne bakhubi dikhaya.. Emotions ki koi kami nahi thi story Mein. Story keval incest he nahi thi bahot kuch add kiya aapne 2 characters k base par he. Koyal kaa character bahot he naturally show kiya gaya jisase usme Jaan aagayi maano. Bablu ki shyness ko bhi bade he baareeki se show kiya aapne jisase woh bhi alive laga. Cons- Story Mein 2 cheejein missing thi 1st flow and second spark.. Flow kaafi weak tha story kaa jabki start Mein bahot he ummda tha aage chalke aap incest theme par kuch jyaada he focus hogaye jisase flow piche chutt gaya or story aage chaltey chaltey tutti futti lagne lagi. Then second tha spark, start se he plot dekh k readers ne bahot kuch expect kiya tha but aapne story ko plain and simple rakha jisase thodi boring lagne lagi story progress k sath sath i know Aap easily add kar shaktey they ye sab but kyun nahi kiya woh aapko he maalum hai. But according to us aapko add karna chaahiye tha story ko or interesting banaane k liye..
Points: 7/10
Story :नया ससुराल
Written by: prkin
Read the story: here
Review: Overview :-A family erotica, with quick escalation of scenarios. Plain but erotic story of Disha, the new daughter in law of house. Sudh hindi kaa kaafi acha use kiya hai aapne. Pros - A plain erotica with suitable ending, without notable grammar mistakes. Story stays in track from beginning to end.Open Relationship kaa concept kaafi sahi tarah se show kiya aapne.. Suruwaat kaafi sahi ki aapne seedha plot ko target kiya jo achi baat hai or plot par ek Hadd takk bane bhi rahe.. Cons -It's a plain erotica without ups and downs, like vanilla ice cream. Writer should have tried to add critical scenes in Story. Open relationship k concept k Uppar isme or bhi kaafi kuch add kar shaktey they aap easily. Lekin Yahaan ye keval ek typical family sex story banke rehgayi or jo aapne itana behtarin concept choose kiya tha woh feeka lagne laga.. Best of luck for the contest.. I hope aage aap thodi or variaties show karenge ek he plot Mein..
PART - IV
Points: 6.5/10
Story : Doshi kon
Written by: 11 ster fan
Read the story: here
Review: Overview :- Story is based on rape scenario, may be based on true events. Writer is trying make a point here through this story, that society is still stucked in its judgemental behavior. Pros:-Story is about a sensitive topic and it seems the narrator is trying his best. While story has moral lesson for society, it also demands need of understanding environment not the sympathetic one.Isske sath sath aapne media kaa Kala cehhra bhi ujaagar kiya hai story k plot Mein bane rehtey hue jo bada he rochak bana deta hai Iss story ko..Or sabse ummda Baat story k andar rehtey hue ye message send kiya aapne :bow:.. Cons-Grammatical and spelling mistakes makes story hard to read, writer should have slowed down a bit and should have spent a little time on spelling, punctuation marks and paragraphs.Narration and flow kaafi weak tha story kaa jiska main reason tha story bahot he choti thi aap easily isme or bahot kuch add kar shaktey they lekin aapne jaldbaaji Mein end kardiya story kaa jisase story end hone k Baad bhi adhuri lagi.. Overall a good story with a strong message to the society.. Best of luck for the contest..
Points: 7.5/10
Story : BALATKARI SE MOHABBAT- EK CHHOTI SI PREM KAHANI
Written by: Mahi Maurya
Read the story: here
Review:Overview :-Story kaa title story se justice nahi karta hai beshak theme ek jaisa ho but kaafi alag lagti hai story.Story Mein kam he characters add kiye aapne or sabko baareeki se show kiya. Pros -Story has dramatic turns that may gave readers soft corners about both main characters of story.Story characters k bich kaafi Saari misunderstandings hui jinhe aapne bahot ache se likha. Narration medium raha story kaa end Mein flow kaafi sahi show kiya or ek he vibe k sath end kiya aapne story ko jo mujhe personally bahot he pasand aaya.. Cons- Ye topic bahot he sensible hai specially jab aap Kahaani likh rahe ho woh bhi short kyunki bahot kuch miss ho Jaata Hai jo Yahaan hua aapne kaafi kuch miss kiya kuch jagah feelings and emotions bahot jyaada show kiye or kuch jagah bahot he kam. Or ek baat message jo aap dena caah rahi thi woh readers takk nahi pohancha yaa readers ne usse accept nahi kiya because Rape is Rape and it should be punished. In simple words for Raza's response to Hayaa, "Life's unfairness doesn't give you license to walk on the wrong path". Period. Overall a great story with a good plot but average narration and flow.
Points: 7.5/10
Story : Love Triangle...
Written by: AbhaySmarty
Read the story: here
Review:Overview :-Story title makes readers looking for 3rd character, if it's male or female. In start many readers may think main character is an obsessed lover, and it's kind of truth. Then story takes a sharp turn and makes it smile maker story in the end.In short Ektarfa pyar ko kaafi ache se show kiya aapne. Pros- Story has caught readers curiosity from start till the end, plot of story has remained intact. A touch of shayari gives a poetic toćhe.Story k characters se aapne focus loose nahi kiya jisase readers kaa Dhyaan bhi story se nahi hata.. Emotions ko kaafi ache se show kiya aapne.Kahin bhi over dramatic nahi hone diya story ko. Kabeer ki feelings ko bhi amazingly show kiya aapne maano aapne experience kiya ho ye sab.. Iss story se bahot se log relate kar shaktey hain jo ek plus point hai.. Cons -Altogether story was good, with new plot and good ending, many readers may have been looking for a little more drama (like Rani's BF or else). Besides its a good story but thoda saa Spark missing tha story Mein se jiski wajah se story kaafi plain lagi. Start on point thi aapki but middle Mein aake aapka flow tutta jiski wajah se story Mein unnecessary space create hua. Overall a cute story about love and relationships. Best of luck for the contest..
Points: 6.5/10
Story : Bachat
Written by: AbhaySmarty
Read the story: here
Review: Overview :- it's SHORT story that fits criteria of contest, while it's a moral based short story, but it still make us nod in yes that 'yeah he's right, we've seen that in lockdown'.Teer kaafi sahi jagah chalaya hai aapne :D or almost laga bhi sahi hai.. Pros- Nobody like moral based story as lengthy story so here writer has cut it in short. And explained why it's important to use a reasonable amount of money.Story ek seekh deti hai humein. Ye aapki piche waali story se kaafi different hai or alag alag tarah ki 2 kahaaniyan likhna ek bahot he achi baat hai readers ko different cheej milti hai padhne ko or ye aapke multi talent ko show karti hai. Cons -Overall a good story but readers were expecting more after one paragraph like sabko maalum tha ki aap kya kehna caah rahe ho kyunki ek type se ye reality based story he hai toh story Mein Woh suspense nahi tha or message aapka jo end Mein diya woh suruwaat Mein he mill gaya tha readers ko.. Overall a Nice story with a good message.
Points: 9/10
Story : अपहरण
Written by: HalfbludPrince
Read the story: here
Review: Overview :-A conspiracy theory within conspiracy theory. It's like a Russian doll within a Russian doll within another Russian doll. Story has made readers accuse each and every character of story even their maid too. Story finally ended at criminals sentenced to lifetime prison sentence but there is still a lot to know, another view of story to uncovers itself. And here's the end.Ek typical Ftk story jo purane readers hain woh samjh gaye main kya kehna cash raha hun.. Pros- Ek behtarin thriller story ko short Mein itane ache se likhna apne aap Mein he ek achievement hai or usme bhi jyaada kuch miss nahi kiya aapne story Mein readers ko sab milla thrill suspense and goosebumps story mostly unexpected thi jisase aage padhne Mein or maja aaraha tha.. Investigations part kaafi sahi tha like sab kuch Saamne horaha tha. Or best part story kaa tha story hindi Mein thi or spelling mistakes naa k barabar thi jaisa aapse expected tha.. Cons- Ek Thriller short story likhne kaa ek he negative point hai aapke pass time or words dono ki kami rehti hai but still aapne apna best diya Iss story mein lekin still kaafi kuch miss kiya aapne maybe time kam tha aapke pass wahi reason ho shakta hai kyunki words toh aapke pass Baaki they story kuch jagah rush ki gayi hai like bus hogaya jiska ek example ending Mein mila ki goliyaan chali goliyaan lagi pakkada unko then seedha police station and then sab bata diya like CID Waali feeling thi wahan par thappad laga and seedha confession woh bhi thoda awkward laga mujhe but again ye short story contest hai so maybe Iss wajah se ye jaldbaaji thi aapki so understandable hai.. Overall a perfect thriller..
Points: 7/10
Story :यादे अब भी है......
Written by: Adirshi
Read the story: here
Review: Overview:- Story has a different kind of impact on readers which is mostly known as 'if'. If Amit had foretold her to stay away from Vishal ? If he'd confessed his feelings for her ? If he could read her pain behind her eyes ? If, if and if. In the end Amit is still haunted by this 'if' even after years of happy married life.Story jyaada faili hui nahi thi limited characters they limited locations thi and bharr bharr k emotions and dialogues they.. Pros- - Story's end was kind of predictable for readers as they've assumed this will end with two possibilities, but still it didn't lessen impact of story aapne story ko weak nahi bananey diya. Jaisa maine kaha characters limited they but perfectly balanced they and sabke dialogues limited they..Limited dialogues k bich Mein Ek story ko likhna apne aap Mein ek positive point hai. :claps:.. Or ye story dusari story se bahot jyaada different hai so bahot he achi Baat Hai ye aapke readers k liye ki unko dono alag alag stories padhne ko milli aapke dwara.. Cons - Story usually stays on path, but many were expecting a good end, but it's the life. Writer tried to portray Amit's regret of this incident, but he should have shown her pov too.Story Predictable thi but again Iss genre Mein stories mostly predictable rehti hain. Ek or issue tha thoda slow paced story thi toh thodi boriyat hui bich Mein. Overall A Cute story..
Points: 7.5/10
Story : THE REVENGE (BADLA)
Written by: manikmittalme07
Read the story: here
Review: Overview - A story of revenge.Jisme bahot kuch add kiya aapne. Sheenu kaa character bahot he realistically show kiya aapne uski majburi ko bhi sahi se show kiya jo aaj ke Iss world Mein bahot dekhne ko millti hai.In short aapne story ko reality based rakha. Pros:Start jab hui story ki toh mujhe kaafi acha laga family drama kaafi well written tha and then Sheenu k mama and mami k baare mein btaaake aapne or deep bana diya story ko jisase story ka base strong hua.. Flow kaafi sahi tha story kaa throughout the story bichmein thoda dagmagaaya jarur but aapne ache se manage kiya usko. Then business line ko bahot he ache se show kiya aapne details Mein, jo mujh jaise anaadi ko bhi samjh aaya :D ye aapka experience show karta hai. Cons:-Start se middle takk story fast forward mode Mein rahi jo mujhe bilkul pasand nahi aaya mujhe characters ko thoda or jaanana tha i know short story contest tha but important part miss kiya aapne balki uske jagah aap kai cheejein remove kar shaktey they story se. Then narration kaafi weak thi story ki jiska main reason ye fast forwarding he thi jaisa maine kaha aapka flow halka saa dagmagaaya tha uska reason bhi yahi tha. Agar ek proper revenge story he likhni thi toh aapko start fast forward karni chaahiye thi like Sheenu kaa background, uske mama mami ka unnecessary part woh bahot he ummda tha but unnecessary tha ek revenge story k base par.. Story ki start uske end se bilkul match nahi kar rahi jabki passand mujhe dono he cheejein aai. Start meri favourite thi jo deep connection aap banana caah rahe they usme kamyaab hue aap start se but then story ne Revenge plot leliya toh fir awkward hogaya stuff.. Aap iski 2 stories likh shaktey hain start jaisi hui usase Vivek or Sheenu ki love story and then different start k sath same end with revenge plot.. :D. Overall a unique experience for me in a good way..
Points: 7/10
Story : The Inner Love
Written by: mohit98075
Read the story: here
Review: Overview -Writer ne title dhokadhaddi k liye rakha hai :D.. Inner love Kehne k liye hai story Mein but real Mein bus feelings he thi love nahi tha.. I mean Naina ko sab pata tha Pritam k baare Mein Yahaan takk ki ussne apni aankhon se sab dekha tha but still ussne usko Pehle chance diya and then usko injured kiya woh kyun tha i dont know. Maybe young ladki thi thodi naa samjh duniya nahi dekhi thi :D. Pros:-Story short thi kaafi short jiski wajah se focus karne k liye kuch nahi tha agar Issi story ko thoda details Mein likha jase toh or better rehta change kuch nahi karna tha naa he kuch naya add karna tha bus same events ko detail Mein likhna tha like past Mein exactly kya hua tha and then Gigolo banke Pritam aaya bus sabkuch jaldi jaldi nipat gaya.. Yahaan taareef main plot ki he kar shakta hun waakai Mein ummda tha romance and sexual frustration kaa mix plot tha.. Then best part narrate kaafi ache se kiya aapne story ko ye nahi tha ki Haan chalo likhdiya nahi narration on point tha aapka.. Cons:Again same thing short story thi focus karne ko kuch nahi tha spelling mistakes bhi kaafi thi story Mein.. Narration kaafi sahi tha but flow nahi tha story Mein jiski wajah same thi fast forward mode. Aapse mujhe iski umeed nahi thi reason jo bhi ho. Overall a good story..
Points: 8.5/10
Story : Docomo I love You.
Written by: Ankitarani
Read the story: here
Review: Overview :- Well well well what we have here :D.. Let me just say this is the most awkward story I have read in a contest both in a good way and bad way. Sach kahun toh start Mein maine expect nahi kiya tha ki he story aisi karwat legi you got me there :claps:. Amul hates animals specially dogs reason clear hai jo ek hissab se sahi bhi hai kuch darr humessa sath rehtey hain Amul kaa darr aage chalke Nafrat Mein badal gaya or uss Nafrat k Uppar puri story depend karti hai.. Pros:Story k baare Mein sabse main cheej main aapki tareeka karunga ye plot select karne k liye i mean contest story Mein aisa plot likhne kaa risk liya aapne well done. Then itana ache se narrate kiya aapne Iss story ko i love dogs and i can understand the message you were sending to the readers.. Good work on that. Then character development kaafi sahi thi Amul ki baaki kuch tha nahi character wise isme Sangeeta kaa character short tha usko judge karne k liye.. But still limited characters k bich aapne ye puri kahani likh di woh bhi itane behtarin narration k sath gajab. Cons:Jaisa maine kaha kaafi awkward plot tha ye jisse aapne ache se likha but again ek aise main character ko leke kuch likhna i know bahot hard hota hai jo dikha aapki story Mein you were struggling at some points. And then again ek or story start se fast forward hui I know ye ek short story contest hai but guys guys humein (As readers) pasand hai story characters ko halka saa Jaan lena interest badh Jaata Hai usase story kaa. Ab again Iss fast forward ki wajah se suru Mein aisa flow bigada story kaa jo waapis aaya middle Mein Jaake and then fir ending Mein flow weak hogaya jiska main reason tha adla badli. Amul kaa Docomo ban Jaana i know funny tha but woh kahin bhi story Mein fit nahi baithega uss scene ko hata dein toh ye mere liye second best story hai is contest ki. Overall a unique story of its own..
Points: 7/10
Story : Dream Girl
Written by: Ankitarani
Read the story: here
Review: Overview - Pehle toh iska title badalwaaiye madam ji :bat: aisa karta hai bhalla koi Jaan nikal jaati abhi romantic story kaa mood banaya tha pata nahi kaise khoon he khoon padh aaya. :confused:.. Ab sabse Pehle main he bataadun aapko you should write more thriller stories behad ummda likhti hain aap ye story aapki last story se bahot unique lagi mujhe i know fast forward isme bhi tha but isme justified tha woh sab. . Pros:First things first Iss story ki narration last story se bhi better thi iska Matlab amazing thi bahot he neatly explain kiya aapne Iss story ko. Plot sahi chuna tha Psychological Thriller nice but main isko thriller he kahunga Psychological level takk story nahi pohanch paai jo theek hai humein mill gaya jo chaahiye tha..Riya or Ravi kaa character suru Mein jaisa dikha rahi thi aap laga nahi tha aage chalke ye sab hoga woh surprise element ache se dikhaaya aapne. Cons:Ye story ek normal above average story thi overall but ek cheej thi jo weak thi woh tha aapka flow. I think aap story Mein Kuch jyaada he kho ja rahi hain jiski wajah se flow nahi catch kar paa rahi aap.. Ek writer ko story ek reader banke bhi likhni chaahiye taaki apni feelings or readers ki feelings ko match kar paaein..Ab ye ek thriller thi jisme sab theek tha but maarne kaa reason nahi ji nahi I know possible hai but Ravi kaa character jaisa aapne dikhaaya hai school Mein and all ye jama nahi. Investigation kam thi ye bhi ek issue tha but woh jitani bhi thi on point thi toh usko main ek negative point nahi maanunga but aage se Dhyaan rakhein Murder Mystery stories Mein sabse important hoti hai investigations so unpar khass Dhyaan dena chaahiye. Overall a perfect thriller with so much to offer..
Points: 7/10
Story : The Love Story
Written by: Ristrcted
Read the story: here
Review:Overview - First of all change the title to A Horror Love Story :D. I don't know Aajkal kya chal raha hai log 2 stories ki 1 story banaake likh rahe hain lekin aapne toh Hadd he kardi 3 stories ki he 1 banaa di awesome but baaki double sided stories Mein or aapki story Mein farak ye tha ki aapki story justifiable thi I mean aapki story sabse jyaada sense banati thi keval ek angle ko chhodke jiske baare Mein aage jaakar baat karunga main.. Pros :- Aapne story suru ki ek alag he andaaj Mein Vidya and Sunidhi ki jo start thi jab Sunidhi ne Vidya k pati ko jail bhijwaane Mein help ki and then apne sath rakha usse tab ye toh clear hogaya tha ki aap lesbian plot ki taraf Jaa rahe ho or aisa he hua jo bada he swiftly show kiya aapne.. Flow i must say puri story k dauraan maintain rakha aapne kahin bhi weak nahi tha flow.. Cons:Sabse awkward part jo maine Uppar jikar kiya woh tha Ghost waali situation woh nahi fit baithi Iss story Mein, love prove karne k Orr bhi tareeke they jo plot k hissab se fit baithtey but us angle ne story k majbutt base ko he hilla diya maine expect nahi kiya tha woh situation but jab hui tab laga ki ye awkward hogaya ab story ko iske base k Uppar dobara padhna padega.. And ek or important Baat thi uss situation Mein ki aapne narrate nahi kiya usko ache se maybe aapne woh situation baadmein add ki ho yaa jaldbaaji Mein add ki ho but woh Iss story k liye nahi thi.. Overall a great story..
Points: 8/10 (combined)
Stories :
1) Chhoti Si Kahani
2) Khamosh Mohabbat
3) Untold Story Of Twins
Written by: nain11ster
Read the stories: here
Review: kahaaniyaan Nainu bhai mouj kardi mouj.. Ab Baat karun toh teeno Mein se meri favourite story by far thi Khamosh Mohabbat by far.. Mukesh ka character jo dikhaaya naa aapne that hits in the heart awesomely done Nainu bhai. Then Chaitra k character ko aapne hard banaya or usko bhi easily show kiya Waah maja agaya.. And then jab pyaar kaa ijhaar hua toh 2 different characters k bond ko Ekdum lohe jaisa banaya.. :adore:.. Ab Meri least favorite story thi Untold Story of twins isme mujhe maja nahi aaya sach kahun toh woh Nainster waali chaap thi he nahi isme, laga koi typical fantasy story padh raha hun jiski vocabulary hard hai bus.. Then Baat karun Choti Si kahani ki toh woh story bhi bahot he behtarin likhi hai aapne. Woh time lapse :bow:. Sampoorananad kaa character buildup suru se he kiya aapne uski details then uski business details or uske Baad Raja or mantrimandal kaa jeevit chitran.. Gajab.. Sabse sarhaaniya Baat Hai aapne 3 bahot he alag alag stories likhi jo again prove kardeta hai ki Nainster bhai is great.. :bow:. Teeno stories Mein best part tha Chaitra or Mukesh ki conversation chuu gayi Ekdum woh cuteness woh ego woh attitude Waah nainu bhai Waah.. Overall 2 great stories and 1 good story :D..
Review: Overview - Bahot he ummda story thi too emotional. Samjh nahi aaraha isko real life based bolein yaa movies based because ye sab cheej bahot jagah dekhne ko millti hain. Vijay kaa character bahot he confusing raha i mean not for readers like woh khud confusing tha jisase woh or interesting bana.. Then uske dad kaa character bhi kaafi acha tha story k liye. Pros-Firstly let me talk about the swiftness in the language.. Devnagri ko bahot he ummda tareeke se likha hai aapne hats off to you. Vijay ne ego Mein aake sab kiya and then usse baadmein Jaake realise hua ki woh Kitana galat tha. Or in sabko bahot he ache se show kiya aapne jo regret tha woh saaf dikhaadiya waaah! .. Or jo message aap Iss story k through send karna caahtey they woh loud and clear aapne readers ko diya. Well done.. Cons-Family drama humessa he boring hoti hai but aapne isko ek boring story nahi banane diya but ek point par story boring hojaati hai because of the same thing going on story limited thi like kuch jyaada nahi tha jiski wajah se halki weak rehgayi story. Overall A wonderful experience.. Hats off..
Points: 7/10
Story : बदलते रिश्ते और मानसी
Written by: Lovely Anand
Read the story: here
Review: Overview :- A story with a unique plot.. Story start hui tab laga oh yelo ek or typical Bollywood story accident hua and then wahi same repeat but tumne story he badal di.. Bahot he unique way Mein likha tumne i give you that. Pros - Narration bahot he awesome tha story kaa.. And then language bahot he awesome thi. Grammatically bhi or theoretically bhi. And plus point aapne sabse hatt ke likha.. Emotions ko bahot he ache se show kiya aapne.. Start bahot he behtarin thi jo accident scene tha and then hospital usko aapne bahot he nicely likha.. Cons:-Narrartion awesome tha but jo flow tha story kaa woh narration k sath match nahi kar raha tha jiski wajah se kaafi awkward lagi story jiska ek reason ye bhi ho shakta hai ki plot unexpected tha but still jiss type ki start thi uske hissab se story kaa end kaafi weak tha.. Overall a cute and unique story
Review: Overview :- A story with a unique plot.. Story start hui tab laga oh yelo ek or typical Bollywood story accident hua and then wahi same repeat but tumne story he badal di.. Bahot he unique way Mein likha tumne i give you that. Pros - Narration bahot he awesome tha story kaa.. And then language bahot he awesome thi. Grammatically bhi or theoretically bhi. And plus point aapne sabse hatt ke likha.. Emotions ko bahot he ache se show kiya aapne.. Start bahot he behtarin thi jo accident scene tha and then hospital usko aapne bahot he nicely likha.. Cons:-Narrartion awesome tha but jo flow tha story kaa woh narration k sath match nahi kar raha tha jiski wajah se kaafi awkward lagi story jiska ek reason ye bhi ho shakta hai ki plot unexpected tha but still jiss type ki start thi uske hissab se story kaa end kaafi weak tha.. Overall a cute and unique story
Review: Overview - Well I guess aap unn chuninda writers Mein se ho jissne story k title k sath justice kiya. Jaisa title waisa he aapne show kiya fir woh caahe characters ki Baat Ho yaa fir plot ki. Pros:- Story ki start hui Rattan se then ussne bataaya uski dosti k baare Mein and then story badalti badalti Chandani se hoti hui Ravi and then ek incest relationship par end hui. Ye aapke multi talent ko show karta hai story ne kaafi turns liye in term of events. Or Iss bich story kaa flow jabardast raha jo maintain karna bahot he achi musqill hota hai. Cons:Story kaa narration bahot he weak tha like Rattan k pov se woh intensity show nahi kar paae aap jiske wajah se story middle Mein aake apne path se move hone lagi jiski wajah se end Mein Jo kuch hua woh jaldbaaji jaisa laga. Sensual scenes ko thoda sa weakly show kiya gaya tha jiski wajah se unmein koi point nahi tha.. Overall a good story with a great plot..
Review: Overview - A typical one sided college love story. Deepak Sandhya se pyaar karta tha and as a typical one sided lover woh Sandhya ko kuch Keh nahi paaya.. And then jab ussne himmat karke kehna caaha tab usse pata chala toh sandhya ki Shaadi tay ho chuki hai woh bhi kissi teacher k sath.. Ye concept thoda unique tha story Mein and Yahaan se story completely new hojaati hai.. Pros :- Start se he story ek typical one sided love story ki tarah lagti hai but jaise jaise hum aage progress karte hain toh story kaafi turns leti hai. College reunion part kaafi well described tha. Narration and scene sense kaafi sahi rahi story Mein jiski wajah se story kaa flow barkaraar raha.. Cons:- Iss story k base par aap 3 story likh saktey they teeno kaa plot alag alag rehta (College one sided love, College Réunion and then Horror Story) yaa maybe ye idea tha aapka ki teeno ko milake ek story likhi jaaye but i dont think so issne kaam kiya kyunki story bahot he confusing ban gayi like start Mein typical Bollywood one sided college love story then uski yaadein ye sab expected tha then College reunion or uske Baad kaa scene fir story ko or awkward banata hai aatma lekin kyun?? Tabhi kyun?? Bahot Saare questions un answered rahe story k dauraan..
Review:Overview-Story ki start padhke lagta hai ki ye koi horror story hogi. Kyunki start hoti hai Shah se usko raat ko kuch dikhta hai woh wahaan Jaata Hai darrtey hue then usse wahaan Shivshankar or Shivangi milltey hain jo injured they and wahan se story progress hoti hai. Pros-Story ko bahot he ache se narrate kiya gaya hai or aapki hindi kaafi achi hai kuch jagah mistakes hain but itana hota hai. Then story kaa flow kaafi sahi hai.. Story characters bus limited they but sabka apna alag mehtav show kiya hai usme aapne jo ek achi Baat Hai.. Cons:- I know ye ek short story contest tha but aapne story bahot he short rakhi jiss tarah ki thrilling start aapne di thi story se bahot kuch expected tha readers ko but in the end ye bus ek typical sex story banke reh gayi sex scenes thode weak they story ki sensuality missing thi.. I know you can write a lot better then that so I hope next time aap or better try karenge plot selection k maamle Mein.
Review: Overview - Ek or story jo apne title se justice karti hai totally. Ek behad ummda koshish thriller story likhne ki. I know short story Mein Ek murder mystery likhna bahot hard hota hai but you did a great job so hats off to you. Pros:- Story Mein bahot Saare characters involved they but mainly story kuch characters par he focused thi character buildup kaafi sahi tha.. Flow bhi bahot sahi raha throughout the whole story jisase story ki layy bani rahi. Or ek most important Baat thi, characters kaa background fir caahe woh ek Journalist ho yaa fir woh inspector Dushyant ho aapne sabko naturally show kiya unki job Mein Jo ek or plus point hai story kaa isase story Mein realistic feelings aati hain. Cons:Story ki start bahot he thrilling thi Neha kaa intro then Baaki sab or uske Baad fir murder. Then ab ek murder mystery kaa sabse hard and important part hota hai ending sab kuch explain karna jo ye nahi hai ki aapne ache se nahi kiya but unfortunately end kaafi awkward laga Ye sab bahot he easily show kardiya aapne like bus hogaya kind of vibes.. Jiski wajah se story kaa flow last mein aake thoda dagmagaaya or end Mein story over dramatic lagi. Overall a good thriller..
Points: 7/10
Story : जीवन-ज्योति
Written by: Lovely Anand
Read the story: here
Review: Overview - An interesting romantic story based on two lovers turned brother and sister.. Incest k hissab se Baat ki jaae toh kaafi acha plot banaya aapne normal direct bhai behen kaa scene naa rakh k Jeevan and Jyoti ko Pehle lovers banaya and then sab reveal kiya. Good One.. Pros - Story bhalle he incest themed ho but romantic scenes ko bhi baareeki se likha hai aapne. Characters limited they but unke Uppar focus rakha aapne jisase story kaa interest increase hua.. Then aapki narration kaafi achi rahi throughout the story. And then Aapne Jeevan or Jyoti ko lovers show kiya wahaan bhi aapne interest loose nahi hone diya readers kaa ye ek plus point tha Iss story kaa.. Cons:Story bhalle he interesting thi but start se he flow mising tha story kaa jo last takk raha aisa lag raha tha ki bus sab horaha hai and humlog padh rahe they woh.. Sex scene kaafi small and weakly written they maybe writer ne Dhyaan nahi diya story ko romantic based rakha but agar sex scenes likhe he they unko thoda detailed likhtey toh sensuality or increase hoti story ki.. Ek or cheej jo missing thi woh thi character dialogues, kuch jagah toh aisa lag raha tha ki ek likhi likhaai script padh raha hun lekin kuch jagah dialogues ko bahot he sateek or baareeki se likha gaya hai jo ummda Baat Hai jisase lagta hai story aapne jaldbaaji Mein likhi hai.. Overview a good romantic read.. I hope i see little bit more from your side in future because easily tum or bahot jyaada acha kar shaktey ho..
Review: Overview - An interesting romantic story based on two lovers turned brother and sister.. Incest k hissab se Baat ki jaae toh kaafi acha plot banaya aapne normal direct bhai behen kaa scene naa rakh k Jeevan and Jyoti ko Pehle lovers banaya and then sab reveal kiya. Good One.. Pros - Story bhalle he incest themed ho but romantic scenes ko bhi baareeki se likha hai aapne. Characters limited they but unke Uppar focus rakha aapne jisase story kaa interest increase hua.. Then aapki narration kaafi achi rahi throughout the story. And then Aapne Jeevan or Jyoti ko lovers show kiya wahaan bhi aapne interest loose nahi hone diya readers kaa ye ek plus point tha Iss story kaa.. Cons:Story bhalle he interesting thi but start se he flow mising tha story kaa jo last takk raha aisa lag raha tha ki bus sab horaha hai and humlog padh rahe they woh.. Sex scene kaafi small and weakly written they maybe writer ne Dhyaan nahi diya story ko romantic based rakha but agar sex scenes likhe he they unko thoda detailed likhtey toh sensuality or increase hoti story ki.. Ek or cheej jo missing thi woh thi character dialogues, kuch jagah toh aisa lag raha tha ki ek likhi likhaai script padh raha hun lekin kuch jagah dialogues ko bahot he sateek or baareeki se likha gaya hai jo ummda Baat Hai jisase lagta hai story aapne jaldbaaji Mein likhi hai.. Overview a good romantic read.. I hope i see little bit more from your side in future because easily tum or bahot jyaada acha kar shaktey ho..
Review: Overview :- This is the most interesting story I've read in this contest I am confused ki Iss story se kya except karun but finally i started reading it i was surprised with the detailed writing, great stuff. Karan was a robot ok then main isme involve hua toh aapne Karan ka love angle add kiya Miksha and uski death jo unnecessary tha mere hissab se. Then main uspar focus karne laga toh aapne Aniket ko add kiya ye character bahot he ummda tareeke se portray kiya aapne i give you that.. Pros:Story kaa narration bahot he neat and clean tha like on point. Then Karan And Aniket k dialogues on point they like lag raha tha ki Robot k words hain woh. Start bahot he precisely ki aapne Woh mahoool woh lover poitn woh view and then intro uske Baad Miksha kaa character jo ek hissab se Karan ki girlfriend he thi but uski death hogayi ussi time. And then Ekdum se Aniket kaa aana and then unki baatein Ruhi kaa involvement Karan kaa anger and uske anger k results uske Baad Ruhi and karan then Ruhi k dialogues uske Baad fir ek passionate kiss.. Isase ye saaf hai ki story Mein bahot kuch hua or aapne harr cheeej baareeki se likhi bhi.. Cons:Ab future stories yaa movies kaa sabse bada negative point ye hai ki unhe padhne waalon ne usase Pehle he future ki ek image apne dimag Mein set kar rakhi hoti hai ki future aisa hoga ye sabne kiya hai obviously toh jab story Mein Woh imagination match nahi hoti toh interest loose hota hai same mere sath hua. I totally think plot misguided tha aap ye complete story human based bhi likh shaktey they 2021 Mein bilkul same but Robots ko add karke Iss story kaa viewpoint he badal gaya and then story incomplete he rahi Vishwanath kaa kya hoga?? Or agar kuch hona he nahi tha toh usko unnecessarily add kyun kiya gaya? Ye ek or question tha mera.. Then Ruhi or Karan k bich itani easily sab hona ye or bhi awkward banata hai story ko. Story bahot detailed thi but still kaafi details missing thi. Overall a confusing yet good read..
Review: Overview - A good Incest story on brother and sister relationship. Koyal or Bablu dono k character ko he baareeki se show kiya aapne jisase story ko ek base milla buildup k liye. Pros- Plot kaafi well developed tha and then limited characters k bich itane Saare dialogues likhna apne aap Mein Ek skill hai jo aapne bakhubi dikhaya.. Emotions ki koi kami nahi thi story Mein. Story keval incest he nahi thi bahot kuch add kiya aapne 2 characters k base par he. Koyal kaa character bahot he naturally show kiya gaya jisase usme Jaan aagayi maano. Bablu ki shyness ko bhi bade he baareeki se show kiya aapne jisase woh bhi alive laga. Cons- Story Mein 2 cheejein missing thi 1st flow and second spark.. Flow kaafi weak tha story kaa jabki start Mein bahot he ummda tha aage chalke aap incest theme par kuch jyaada he focus hogaye jisase flow piche chutt gaya or story aage chaltey chaltey tutti futti lagne lagi. Then second tha spark, start se he plot dekh k readers ne bahot kuch expect kiya tha but aapne story ko plain and simple rakha jisase thodi boring lagne lagi story progress k sath sath i know Aap easily add kar shaktey they ye sab but kyun nahi kiya woh aapko he maalum hai. But according to us aapko add karna chaahiye tha story ko or interesting banaane k liye..
Review: Overview :-A family erotica, with quick escalation of scenarios. Plain but erotic story of Disha, the new daughter in law of house. Sudh hindi kaa kaafi acha use kiya hai aapne. Pros - A plain erotica with suitable ending, without notable grammar mistakes. Story stays in track from beginning to end.Open Relationship kaa concept kaafi sahi tarah se show kiya aapne.. Suruwaat kaafi sahi ki aapne seedha plot ko target kiya jo achi baat hai or plot par ek Hadd takk bane bhi rahe.. Cons -It's a plain erotica without ups and downs, like vanilla ice cream. Writer should have tried to add critical scenes in Story. Open relationship k concept k Uppar isme or bhi kaafi kuch add kar shaktey they aap easily. Lekin Yahaan ye keval ek typical family sex story banke rehgayi or jo aapne itana behtarin concept choose kiya tha woh feeka lagne laga.. Best of luck for the contest.. I hope aage aap thodi or variaties show karenge ek he plot Mein..
Review: Overview :- Story is based on rape scenario, may be based on true events. Writer is trying make a point here through this story, that society is still stucked in its judgemental behavior. Pros:-Story is about a sensitive topic and it seems the narrator is trying his best. While story has moral lesson for society, it also demands need of understanding environment not the sympathetic one.Isske sath sath aapne media kaa Kala cehhra bhi ujaagar kiya hai story k plot Mein bane rehtey hue jo bada he rochak bana deta hai Iss story ko..Or sabse ummda Baat story k andar rehtey hue ye message send kiya aapne :bow:.. Cons-Grammatical and spelling mistakes makes story hard to read, writer should have slowed down a bit and should have spent a little time on spelling, punctuation marks and paragraphs.Narration and flow kaafi weak tha story kaa jiska main reason tha story bahot he choti thi aap easily isme or bahot kuch add kar shaktey they lekin aapne jaldbaaji Mein end kardiya story kaa jisase story end hone k Baad bhi adhuri lagi.. Overall a good story with a strong message to the society.. Best of luck for the contest..
Review:Overview :-Story kaa title story se justice nahi karta hai beshak theme ek jaisa ho but kaafi alag lagti hai story.Story Mein kam he characters add kiye aapne or sabko baareeki se show kiya. Pros -Story has dramatic turns that may gave readers soft corners about both main characters of story.Story characters k bich kaafi Saari misunderstandings hui jinhe aapne bahot ache se likha. Narration medium raha story kaa end Mein flow kaafi sahi show kiya or ek he vibe k sath end kiya aapne story ko jo mujhe personally bahot he pasand aaya.. Cons- Ye topic bahot he sensible hai specially jab aap Kahaani likh rahe ho woh bhi short kyunki bahot kuch miss ho Jaata Hai jo Yahaan hua aapne kaafi kuch miss kiya kuch jagah feelings and emotions bahot jyaada show kiye or kuch jagah bahot he kam. Or ek baat message jo aap dena caah rahi thi woh readers takk nahi pohancha yaa readers ne usse accept nahi kiya because Rape is Rape and it should be punished. In simple words for Raza's response to Hayaa, "Life's unfairness doesn't give you license to walk on the wrong path". Period. Overall a great story with a good plot but average narration and flow.
Review:Overview :-Story title makes readers looking for 3rd character, if it's male or female. In start many readers may think main character is an obsessed lover, and it's kind of truth. Then story takes a sharp turn and makes it smile maker story in the end.In short Ektarfa pyar ko kaafi ache se show kiya aapne. Pros- Story has caught readers curiosity from start till the end, plot of story has remained intact. A touch of shayari gives a poetic toćhe.Story k characters se aapne focus loose nahi kiya jisase readers kaa Dhyaan bhi story se nahi hata.. Emotions ko kaafi ache se show kiya aapne.Kahin bhi over dramatic nahi hone diya story ko. Kabeer ki feelings ko bhi amazingly show kiya aapne maano aapne experience kiya ho ye sab.. Iss story se bahot se log relate kar shaktey hain jo ek plus point hai.. Cons -Altogether story was good, with new plot and good ending, many readers may have been looking for a little more drama (like Rani's BF or else). Besides its a good story but thoda saa Spark missing tha story Mein se jiski wajah se story kaafi plain lagi. Start on point thi aapki but middle Mein aake aapka flow tutta jiski wajah se story Mein unnecessary space create hua. Overall a cute story about love and relationships. Best of luck for the contest..
Review: Overview :- it's SHORT story that fits criteria of contest, while it's a moral based short story, but it still make us nod in yes that 'yeah he's right, we've seen that in lockdown'.Teer kaafi sahi jagah chalaya hai aapne :D or almost laga bhi sahi hai.. Pros- Nobody like moral based story as lengthy story so here writer has cut it in short. And explained why it's important to use a reasonable amount of money.Story ek seekh deti hai humein. Ye aapki piche waali story se kaafi different hai or alag alag tarah ki 2 kahaaniyan likhna ek bahot he achi baat hai readers ko different cheej milti hai padhne ko or ye aapke multi talent ko show karti hai. Cons -Overall a good story but readers were expecting more after one paragraph like sabko maalum tha ki aap kya kehna caah rahe ho kyunki ek type se ye reality based story he hai toh story Mein Woh suspense nahi tha or message aapka jo end Mein diya woh suruwaat Mein he mill gaya tha readers ko.. Overall a Nice story with a good message.
Review: Overview :-A conspiracy theory within conspiracy theory. It's like a Russian doll within a Russian doll within another Russian doll. Story has made readers accuse each and every character of story even their maid too. Story finally ended at criminals sentenced to lifetime prison sentence but there is still a lot to know, another view of story to uncovers itself. And here's the end.Ek typical Ftk story jo purane readers hain woh samjh gaye main kya kehna cash raha hun.. Pros- Ek behtarin thriller story ko short Mein itane ache se likhna apne aap Mein he ek achievement hai or usme bhi jyaada kuch miss nahi kiya aapne story Mein readers ko sab milla thrill suspense and goosebumps story mostly unexpected thi jisase aage padhne Mein or maja aaraha tha.. Investigations part kaafi sahi tha like sab kuch Saamne horaha tha. Or best part story kaa tha story hindi Mein thi or spelling mistakes naa k barabar thi jaisa aapse expected tha.. Cons- Ek Thriller short story likhne kaa ek he negative point hai aapke pass time or words dono ki kami rehti hai but still aapne apna best diya Iss story mein lekin still kaafi kuch miss kiya aapne maybe time kam tha aapke pass wahi reason ho shakta hai kyunki words toh aapke pass Baaki they story kuch jagah rush ki gayi hai like bus hogaya jiska ek example ending Mein mila ki goliyaan chali goliyaan lagi pakkada unko then seedha police station and then sab bata diya like CID Waali feeling thi wahan par thappad laga and seedha confession woh bhi thoda awkward laga mujhe but again ye short story contest hai so maybe Iss wajah se ye jaldbaaji thi aapki so understandable hai.. Overall a perfect thriller..
Review: Overview:- Story has a different kind of impact on readers which is mostly known as 'if'. If Amit had foretold her to stay away from Vishal ? If he'd confessed his feelings for her ? If he could read her pain behind her eyes ? If, if and if. In the end Amit is still haunted by this 'if' even after years of happy married life.Story jyaada faili hui nahi thi limited characters they limited locations thi and bharr bharr k emotions and dialogues they.. Pros- - Story's end was kind of predictable for readers as they've assumed this will end with two possibilities, but still it didn't lessen impact of story aapne story ko weak nahi bananey diya. Jaisa maine kaha characters limited they but perfectly balanced they and sabke dialogues limited they..Limited dialogues k bich Mein Ek story ko likhna apne aap Mein ek positive point hai. :claps:.. Or ye story dusari story se bahot jyaada different hai so bahot he achi Baat Hai ye aapke readers k liye ki unko dono alag alag stories padhne ko milli aapke dwara.. Cons - Story usually stays on path, but many were expecting a good end, but it's the life. Writer tried to portray Amit's regret of this incident, but he should have shown her pov too.Story Predictable thi but again Iss genre Mein stories mostly predictable rehti hain. Ek or issue tha thoda slow paced story thi toh thodi boriyat hui bich Mein. Overall A Cute story..
Review: Overview - A story of revenge.Jisme bahot kuch add kiya aapne. Sheenu kaa character bahot he realistically show kiya aapne uski majburi ko bhi sahi se show kiya jo aaj ke Iss world Mein bahot dekhne ko millti hai.In short aapne story ko reality based rakha. Pros:Start jab hui story ki toh mujhe kaafi acha laga family drama kaafi well written tha and then Sheenu k mama and mami k baare mein btaaake aapne or deep bana diya story ko jisase story ka base strong hua.. Flow kaafi sahi tha story kaa throughout the story bichmein thoda dagmagaaya jarur but aapne ache se manage kiya usko. Then business line ko bahot he ache se show kiya aapne details Mein, jo mujh jaise anaadi ko bhi samjh aaya :D ye aapka experience show karta hai. Cons:-Start se middle takk story fast forward mode Mein rahi jo mujhe bilkul pasand nahi aaya mujhe characters ko thoda or jaanana tha i know short story contest tha but important part miss kiya aapne balki uske jagah aap kai cheejein remove kar shaktey they story se. Then narration kaafi weak thi story ki jiska main reason ye fast forwarding he thi jaisa maine kaha aapka flow halka saa dagmagaaya tha uska reason bhi yahi tha. Agar ek proper revenge story he likhni thi toh aapko start fast forward karni chaahiye thi like Sheenu kaa background, uske mama mami ka unnecessary part woh bahot he ummda tha but unnecessary tha ek revenge story k base par.. Story ki start uske end se bilkul match nahi kar rahi jabki passand mujhe dono he cheejein aai. Start meri favourite thi jo deep connection aap banana caah rahe they usme kamyaab hue aap start se but then story ne Revenge plot leliya toh fir awkward hogaya stuff.. Aap iski 2 stories likh shaktey hain start jaisi hui usase Vivek or Sheenu ki love story and then different start k sath same end with revenge plot.. :D. Overall a unique experience for me in a good way..
Review: Overview -Writer ne title dhokadhaddi k liye rakha hai :D.. Inner love Kehne k liye hai story Mein but real Mein bus feelings he thi love nahi tha.. I mean Naina ko sab pata tha Pritam k baare Mein Yahaan takk ki ussne apni aankhon se sab dekha tha but still ussne usko Pehle chance diya and then usko injured kiya woh kyun tha i dont know. Maybe young ladki thi thodi naa samjh duniya nahi dekhi thi :D. Pros:-Story short thi kaafi short jiski wajah se focus karne k liye kuch nahi tha agar Issi story ko thoda details Mein likha jase toh or better rehta change kuch nahi karna tha naa he kuch naya add karna tha bus same events ko detail Mein likhna tha like past Mein exactly kya hua tha and then Gigolo banke Pritam aaya bus sabkuch jaldi jaldi nipat gaya.. Yahaan taareef main plot ki he kar shakta hun waakai Mein ummda tha romance and sexual frustration kaa mix plot tha.. Then best part narrate kaafi ache se kiya aapne story ko ye nahi tha ki Haan chalo likhdiya nahi narration on point tha aapka.. Cons:Again same thing short story thi focus karne ko kuch nahi tha spelling mistakes bhi kaafi thi story Mein.. Narration kaafi sahi tha but flow nahi tha story Mein jiski wajah same thi fast forward mode. Aapse mujhe iski umeed nahi thi reason jo bhi ho. Overall a good story..
Review: Overview :- Well well well what we have here :D.. Let me just say this is the most awkward story I have read in a contest both in a good way and bad way. Sach kahun toh start Mein maine expect nahi kiya tha ki he story aisi karwat legi you got me there :claps:. Amul hates animals specially dogs reason clear hai jo ek hissab se sahi bhi hai kuch darr humessa sath rehtey hain Amul kaa darr aage chalke Nafrat Mein badal gaya or uss Nafrat k Uppar puri story depend karti hai.. Pros:Story k baare Mein sabse main cheej main aapki tareeka karunga ye plot select karne k liye i mean contest story Mein aisa plot likhne kaa risk liya aapne well done. Then itana ache se narrate kiya aapne Iss story ko i love dogs and i can understand the message you were sending to the readers.. Good work on that. Then character development kaafi sahi thi Amul ki baaki kuch tha nahi character wise isme Sangeeta kaa character short tha usko judge karne k liye.. But still limited characters k bich aapne ye puri kahani likh di woh bhi itane behtarin narration k sath gajab. Cons:Jaisa maine kaha kaafi awkward plot tha ye jisse aapne ache se likha but again ek aise main character ko leke kuch likhna i know bahot hard hota hai jo dikha aapki story Mein you were struggling at some points. And then again ek or story start se fast forward hui I know ye ek short story contest hai but guys guys humein (As readers) pasand hai story characters ko halka saa Jaan lena interest badh Jaata Hai usase story kaa. Ab again Iss fast forward ki wajah se suru Mein aisa flow bigada story kaa jo waapis aaya middle Mein Jaake and then fir ending Mein flow weak hogaya jiska main reason tha adla badli. Amul kaa Docomo ban Jaana i know funny tha but woh kahin bhi story Mein fit nahi baithega uss scene ko hata dein toh ye mere liye second best story hai is contest ki. Overall a unique story of its own..
Review: Overview - Pehle toh iska title badalwaaiye madam ji :bat: aisa karta hai bhalla koi Jaan nikal jaati abhi romantic story kaa mood banaya tha pata nahi kaise khoon he khoon padh aaya. :confused:.. Ab sabse Pehle main he bataadun aapko you should write more thriller stories behad ummda likhti hain aap ye story aapki last story se bahot unique lagi mujhe i know fast forward isme bhi tha but isme justified tha woh sab. . Pros:First things first Iss story ki narration last story se bhi better thi iska Matlab amazing thi bahot he neatly explain kiya aapne Iss story ko. Plot sahi chuna tha Psychological Thriller nice but main isko thriller he kahunga Psychological level takk story nahi pohanch paai jo theek hai humein mill gaya jo chaahiye tha..Riya or Ravi kaa character suru Mein jaisa dikha rahi thi aap laga nahi tha aage chalke ye sab hoga woh surprise element ache se dikhaaya aapne. Cons:Ye story ek normal above average story thi overall but ek cheej thi jo weak thi woh tha aapka flow. I think aap story Mein Kuch jyaada he kho ja rahi hain jiski wajah se flow nahi catch kar paa rahi aap.. Ek writer ko story ek reader banke bhi likhni chaahiye taaki apni feelings or readers ki feelings ko match kar paaein..Ab ye ek thriller thi jisme sab theek tha but maarne kaa reason nahi ji nahi I know possible hai but Ravi kaa character jaisa aapne dikhaaya hai school Mein and all ye jama nahi. Investigation kam thi ye bhi ek issue tha but woh jitani bhi thi on point thi toh usko main ek negative point nahi maanunga but aage se Dhyaan rakhein Murder Mystery stories Mein sabse important hoti hai investigations so unpar khass Dhyaan dena chaahiye. Overall a perfect thriller with so much to offer..
Review:Overview - First of all change the title to A Horror Love Story :D. I don't know Aajkal kya chal raha hai log 2 stories ki 1 story banaake likh rahe hain lekin aapne toh Hadd he kardi 3 stories ki he 1 banaa di awesome but baaki double sided stories Mein or aapki story Mein farak ye tha ki aapki story justifiable thi I mean aapki story sabse jyaada sense banati thi keval ek angle ko chhodke jiske baare Mein aage jaakar baat karunga main.. Pros :- Aapne story suru ki ek alag he andaaj Mein Vidya and Sunidhi ki jo start thi jab Sunidhi ne Vidya k pati ko jail bhijwaane Mein help ki and then apne sath rakha usse tab ye toh clear hogaya tha ki aap lesbian plot ki taraf Jaa rahe ho or aisa he hua jo bada he swiftly show kiya aapne.. Flow i must say puri story k dauraan maintain rakha aapne kahin bhi weak nahi tha flow.. Cons:Sabse awkward part jo maine Uppar jikar kiya woh tha Ghost waali situation woh nahi fit baithi Iss story Mein, love prove karne k Orr bhi tareeke they jo plot k hissab se fit baithtey but us angle ne story k majbutt base ko he hilla diya maine expect nahi kiya tha woh situation but jab hui tab laga ki ye awkward hogaya ab story ko iske base k Uppar dobara padhna padega.. And ek or important Baat thi uss situation Mein ki aapne narrate nahi kiya usko ache se maybe aapne woh situation baadmein add ki ho yaa jaldbaaji Mein add ki ho but woh Iss story k liye nahi thi.. Overall a great story..
Review: kahaaniyaan Nainu bhai mouj kardi mouj.. Ab Baat karun toh teeno Mein se meri favourite story by far thi Khamosh Mohabbat by far.. Mukesh ka character jo dikhaaya naa aapne that hits in the heart awesomely done Nainu bhai. Then Chaitra k character ko aapne hard banaya or usko bhi easily show kiya Waah maja agaya.. And then jab pyaar kaa ijhaar hua toh 2 different characters k bond ko Ekdum lohe jaisa banaya.. :adore:.. Ab Meri least favorite story thi Untold Story of twins isme mujhe maja nahi aaya sach kahun toh woh Nainster waali chaap thi he nahi isme, laga koi typical fantasy story padh raha hun jiski vocabulary hard hai bus.. Then Baat karun Choti Si kahani ki toh woh story bhi bahot he behtarin likhi hai aapne. Woh time lapse :bow:. Sampoorananad kaa character buildup suru se he kiya aapne uski details then uski business details or uske Baad Raja or mantrimandal kaa jeevit chitran.. Gajab.. Sabse sarhaaniya Baat Hai aapne 3 bahot he alag alag stories likhi jo again prove kardeta hai ki Nainster bhai is great.. :bow:. Teeno stories Mein best part tha Chaitra or Mukesh ki conversation chuu gayi Ekdum woh cuteness woh ego woh attitude Waah nainu bhai Waah.. Overall 2 great stories and 1 good story :D..
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So that was it guys i hope you guys like the results because the judges did and wonderful job IMO. According to the judges selecting top stories was very hard as we had some amazing stories and each one of them deserved a prize but unfortunately we can't do that. Judges said they enjoyed reading every single story posted in this contest some new writers did there best and that was amazing and because of that in future story contests the experienced writers like Yug Purush HalfbludPrince nain11ster Mahi Maurya SANJU ( V. R. ) will have to do there best just to beat these new writers.. 
So that's the end of this contest guys i hope you guys enjoyed this thanks to all of you again and if you have any questions or concerns please feel free to contact me anytime..
Regards
XForum Staff
So that's the end of this contest guys i hope you guys enjoyed this thanks to all of you again and if you have any questions or concerns please feel free to contact me anytime..
Regards
XForum Staff
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